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I can’t stop thinking about being disliked

Markness

Markness

Young God
V.I.P Member
I can’t stop thinking about how some people on this forum dislike me and wish I was gone. It causes a lot of childhood trauma to come back to me.
 
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Markness said:
I can’t stop thinking about how some people on this forum dislike me and wish I was gone. It causes a lot of childhood trauma to come back to me.
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I don't see what there's not to like about you. You've always been a kind, thoughtful guy. You're my friend anyway.
 
Markness said:
I can’t stop thinking about how some people on this forum dislike me and wish I was gone. It causes a lot of childhood trauma to come back to me.
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I think you're great. Try focusing on the people who want you to stay around. Anyone who doesn't want you around doesn't count.
 
Markness said:
I can’t stop thinking about how some people on this forum dislike me and wish I was gone. It causes a lot of childhood trauma to come back to me.
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Imma ask this blunt: What have you done to make people dislike you and wish you were gone?
 
I know that feeling well. And worse still, if I do not even get one thumb up and others have those, I feel very unliked.

It is an awful feeling to contend with.
 
I expect the worst from people. That way, I am never disappointed. Sometimes, however, I am pleasantly surprised!

So what if they don't like me? I probably would not like them, either.
 
Yes I feel like frequently that people dislike me and secretly hate me and want me dead.
Because I have borderline personality disorder too and people tend to revile me a lot.
It is hard knowing what they actually think, it is nice when people care. I am extremely quiet and shy too that I will try to avoid getting too much attention but still want to be loved.
I like not knowing a lot of people but still knowing some.
Because I like a quiet and private life just being me.
 
All of us are liked and disliked by others with an almost 100% guarantee. Everyone can't be your friend or enemy, and most casual encounters are probably pretty neutral. That's kind of how it goes.
 
I can't stand the idea of anyone not liking me. It doesn't affect me to a clinical degree, it just really bothers me to think that anyone doesn't like me.
 
I don't think the issue is whether or not people like you. Some people in this world will, and some won't. I think the root issue is caring.
 
Markness said:
I can’t stop thinking about how some people on this forum dislike me and wish I was gone. It causes a lot of childhood trauma to come back to me.
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Well I don’t want you gone

I don’t dislike you

Listen I was in the same boat

I’m here, I’m good, I’m me
 
For anyone in this thread who is feeling disliked by others and thinking that they wish you were not even alive, I would encourage you to remember that you are probably not on these people's minds nearly as much as you think. Even if they don't really like you, they are probably not even thinking about you.

I hope this is an idea that can free your feelings from being tied to the disapproval and dislike of others. Most humans are focused on themselves and their own experiences in life. Most people decide not to give too much thought to people that they don't know well or don't really like. They are not wishing for your downfall and your death. They are not thinking about you at all.

If we can each accept that none of us is really that important nor that special to others, we can allow ourselves to just go through our lives without caring so much about what others think. We can free ourselves from living through the assumptions we make about others' thoughts... none of us are mind readers.
 
I have to keep telling my self that others probably don’t even think about you enough to judge/hate you etc.. I am a manager and unfortunately people don’t like me lol, comes with the turf unfortunately and is so incredibly hard on me. I hate my job.
 
Rodafina said:
For anyone in this thread who is feeling disliked by others and thinking that they wish you were not even alive, I would encourage you to remember that you are probably not on these people's minds nearly as much as you think. Even if they don't really like you, they are probably not even thinking about you.
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I think this is a great thing to remember. It's also common to mistake indifference for dislike.

People have their own lives - no one is walking around thinking of us. I actually find that sort of liberating, tbh.
 
The only people who may dwell on the fact that they hate you are bullies who have serious issues. But even they get bored of it after a while and you don't stay their top priority for long. I've had people online keep reminding themselves, me and everyone else that they hate me and how awful I apparently am, and if I got upset they'd use the old "we wasn't talking about you, but you thinking it's about you just proves you're a self-obsessed narcissist!" trick. It's called gaslighting, where they make you become paranoid and play mind games with you. Horrible messed up people.
Thankfully most people aren't like this, even if they dislike you for whatever reason. Most people who dislike people prefer to distance themselves as much as possible, which just does you a favour and it's probably the kindest thing they're doing, although it is hurtful when people dislike you for no reason or for stupid reasons.
I try to like everyone unless they give me a good reason not to. But I like to forgive if I can. If they carry on hating me then I'll hate them, if that's how they want it.
 
I would like to state something for myself that, in some way, expands on @Rodafina 's post.

Envy of others can spur alot of the self-loathing, along with loathing towards others. If there is something others have accomplished that you haven't and/or something others have that you never got. Then jealousy ensues. This becomes more of a poison to your soul and your mind, the more you let it fester. In some way you feel like you are being mocked for not having whatever that something is. But in reality, you are only doing this to yourself. The delusions of being mocked only feel stronger the more you feed your Envy.

The reason I bring this up, is that I am coming to terms with a deeply rooted Envy of my own. Jealousy of my half-siblings. Jealousy of others who got good, loving, families. Jealousy of those who have love in any shape and form.

This explains too why Valentine's Day gets so deeply under my skin as a day.
 
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