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I feel like a wimp

M

Misty Avich

Hellooooooooooo!!!
V.I.P Member
OK I know I'm a wimp anyway but I mean when it comes to colds. People often judge people who go sick from work when they have a cold, like adults are expected to "toughen up" and get on with it. Most people I work with turn up for work with a cold, and if they don't they get called a wimp or a baby for being off sick.
But for me a cold is very distracting and it seems to increase my executive function issues and all I want to do is rest as much as I can and stay away from people so that I don't pass it on (covid or not). So it just makes it such a big, draining effort to turn up for work and drag myself around doing tasks with one hand (the other hand mostly being used to hold a tissue to my nose), and I hate it.

Does anyone else take time off sick when you have a full on cold? It's why I try my hardest to avoid catching colds, but it's hard to avoid when you're married and you kiss and cuddle your husband every day, who is usually the first out of the two of us to have the lurgy, as I'm always extra hygienic when out and about.
 
I wish everyone would for the sake of everyone else. But I also don't like taking time off for any reason. It's so awkward.
 
If you have enough sick leave time you can stay home for whatever reason you want.
It's illegal for an employer to ask your reason for illness.
 
As a child, I still had to go to school when I had a cold. Anyway, all the other kids would have the same cold and that's where I doubtlessly caught mine from. Now, as an adult, I never get colds. Got Covid once, though. I work online so I can neither catch nor spread them, and I keep working unless I'm really, really sick.
 
You should home and take care of yourself whenever you are sick and contagious, even if it's a "just" a common cold. Coming to work not only spreads the viruses around but your work performance could be poor if you're not feeling 100%. It's not wimpy, it's smart! Anyone who says otherwise is dumb as a bag of rocks. There could be people with health conditions like asthma or HIV, where even a cold could end up putting them the hospital. And then there's covid. Just hearing others coughing is more painful then ever to me now because covid. Covid covid covid, how it has shown me just how moronic most of the human race really is.

Ever heard of Typhoid Mary? She was an asymptomatic carrier of, well, typhoid, and made many people horribly sick and some even died, but even after she found out she refused to quit her job cooking and rarely washed her hands (which wasn't that strange for the time)

All diseases are bigger and scarier than ever now, and if we don't stop acting like idiots we're going to have the next bubonic plague or smallpox pandemic on our hands.
 
I don't need to worry about catching colds at work, my kids ensure I don't miss out. The words that strike fear into the heart of every parent is when your kid says "oh yeah, xxxxx threw up in class, apparently they have a virus" because you know for sure that a) your kid WILL bring it home and b) in a few days time they'll faithfully pass it to you as you help them with buckets. I am beyond tired of norovirus and would happily take multiple colds over that yearly purge going through our household.

Anyway, onto OP. Stay home. You're not obliged to operate according to other people's ideas of heroism.
 
Ella Spell said:
If you have enough sick leave time you can stay home for whatever reason you want.
It's illegal for an employer to ask your reason for illness.
Click to expand...
That's completely incorrect, at least in the States. Many places I worked you have to have a doctor's explanation of your illness. This explanation is sent to a medical evaluator who decides if your absence was excused. Then you'd get unpaid time off through the government FMLA program. Otherwise, you'd be placed an a "step." Three steps led to being fired. It was written right into the employment contract.

I was once carted out of the work area by paramedics on a gurney due to an extreme case of vertigo and nausea. The doctor wouldn't give me a note. Some doctors are that way; they don't want to take responsibility. So I got written up for the unexcused absence, and the union said they could do nothing.

I was amazed at how useless the union was. It was spineless. But they still took your dues.

A former employee eventually sued the company in a class action suit because they had pressured the evaluators to reject valid sick time. The employee won, and every employee at the site got a thousand dollars, whether they'd ever been rejected for sick leave or not. However, the requirement for the doctor's note remained in place.
 
Misty Avich said:
OK I know I'm a wimp anyway but I mean when it comes to colds. People often judge people who go sick from work when they have a cold, like adults are expected to "toughen up" and get on with it. Most people I work with turn up for work with a cold, and if they don't they get called a wimp or a baby for being off sick.
But for me a cold is very distracting and it seems to increase my executive function issues and all I want to do is rest as much as I can and stay away from people so that I don't pass it on (covid or not). So it just makes it such a big, draining effort to turn up for work and drag myself around doing tasks with one hand (the other hand mostly being used to hold a tissue to my nose), and I hate it.

Does anyone else take time off sick when you have a full on cold? It's why I try my hardest to avoid catching colds, but it's hard to avoid when you're married and you kiss and cuddle your husband every day, who is usually the first out of the two of us to have the lurgy, as I'm always extra hygienic when out and about.
Click to expand...
Yes.
1. I work in a neonatal unit. Immunocompromised, premature infants. No, I will not be coming into work sick.
2. When you're autistic AND dragging, tired, exhausted, etc. your ability to mask is almost zero. I am not fun to be around. Grumpy, irritable, sensory issues at their peak. Try to maintain a professional composure under that sort of stress. No, I will not be coming into work sick.
3. No matter how much you think you are washing your hands, wearing your mask, however you think you are trying to protect others from your "creep and crud", bugs will spread to your co-workers. No, I will not be coming into work sick.
 
I don't get grumpy or irritable when ill, but I do have greater brain fog and will more likely be easily distracted from my work (even though I am easily distracted at work anyway, but more so when ill). Although I work in a garage, I still don't want to spread a virus around. Having a cold isn't pleasant and I rather stay indoors and recover than to go spreading it to other people.
I suffer with hay fever and chronic sinusitis, although I'm on meds for it I still sometimes get it, so I'm often sneezing a lot at work anyway but I can easily tell the difference between a cold and hay fever, and this time it's a cold, so the sneezes will be contagious.
 
Misty Avich said:
OK I know I'm a wimp anyway but I mean when it comes to colds. People often judge people who go sick from work when they have a cold, like adults are expected to "toughen up" and get on with it. Most people I work with turn up for work with a cold, and if they don't they get called a wimp or a baby for being off sick.
But for me a cold is very distracting and it seems to increase my executive function issues and all I want to do is rest as much as I can and stay away from people so that I don't pass it on (covid or not). So it just makes it such a big, draining effort to turn up for work and drag myself around doing tasks with one hand (the other hand mostly being used to hold a tissue to my nose), and I hate it.

Does anyone else take time off sick when you have a full on cold? It's why I try my hardest to avoid catching colds, but it's hard to avoid when you're married and you kiss and cuddle your husband every day, who is usually the first out of the two of us to have the lurgy, as I'm always extra hygienic when out and about.
Click to expand...
It is important to take time off and rest the body. Maybe you catch it because it is a time you need to rest.
Works should allow time off saves everyone else from getting it.
Nothing worse than avoiding a sick person or fearing one at work.

It is hard for autistics to have colds, throat and nose hurts worse, nose feels disgusting and sore from blowing.
Fatigue and headache worse. Feels like death warmed up and grumpy too.
 
Misty Avich said:
Does anyone else take time off sick when you have a full on cold?
Click to expand...

When I was in college I got pneumonia, it took me a week and a half to finally go to the doctor and get it treated and I think this is why this happens

Every time I got a cold it would right away turn into bronchitis. I don't get colds, I get bronchitis and horrible throat infections (luckily I am healthier nowadays)

So I took days off work to fend it off, however, my parents would just insult me and call me lazy and a wimp for not working at the farm (very physical demanding job, plus filled with dust) and being extremely sick. They would also insult me for looking sickly

They are horrible people

So yeah I get super sick when I get a cold. I don't get colds, I get bronchitis or throat infections
 
Au Naturel said:
That's completely incorrect, at least in the States. Many places I worked you have to have a doctor's explanation of your illness. This explanation is sent to a medical evaluator who decides if your absence was excused. Then you'd get unpaid time off through the government FMLA program. Otherwise, you'd be placed an a "step." Three steps led to being fired. It was written right into the employment contract.

I was once carted out of the work area by paramedics on a gurney due to an extreme case of vertigo and nausea. The doctor wouldn't give me a note. Some doctors are that way; they don't want to take responsibility. So I got written up for the unexcused absence, and the union said they could do nothing.

I was amazed at how useless the union was. It was spineless. But they still took your dues.

A former employee eventually sued the company in a class action suit because they had pressured the evaluators to reject valid sick time. The employee won, and every employee at the site got a thousand dollars, whether they'd ever been rejected for sick leave or not. However, the requirement for the doctor's note remained in place.
Click to expand...

I just lost/quit a job because of this same sick policy. Only one day off from work if sick and you have to have a doctor's note . . . tell me how many doctors do you know who work on Sunday? And you think I'm going back to working 12 hr days/seven days a week after only one day off? It took me five days of sleeping just to get up to a normal sick level of energy. Not well, just normal sick and I slept for three more days after that.
 
Too many times I have caught something that was "going around" the office when people came in sick. It impacted everybody's productivity, so I had thought that coming into work sick was irresponsible. I always stayed away as even colds sometimes knocked me on my ass.
 
Au Naturel said:
That's completely incorrect, at least in the States. Many places I worked you have to have a doctor's explanation of your illness. This explanation is sent to a medical evaluator who decides if your absence was excused. Then you'd get unpaid time off through the government FMLA program. Otherwise, you'd be placed an a "step." Three steps led to being fired. It was written right into the employment contract.
Click to expand...
This caught my attention and it sounds harsh. We've got stronger industrial relations laws here although there's always companies that will try and abuse them.

In Australia by law you get 10 sick days a year and 20 days annual leave a year as an employee. Annual leave is accumulative but sick leave is not. If you're only taking one day off you can without a doctor's note unless it's a day adjacent to a long weekend.

From there different companies have different policies, some will let your sick days accumulate, some will be as draconian as possible with them. Most are quite reasonable, if they value your work and it doesn't look like you're a systematic abuser they'll let you get away with a fair bit.

I used to take days off for stress but I could never tell employers that, fortunately I could just pull a day here and there if I really needed to. Just ring up early and leave a message on the answering machine.
 
I stay home. I listen to myself and my body first.
It is the same as put the mask on yourself before helping someone else.

During the last season of Covid I worked in a grocery store and decided to stay unvaccinated. I wasn’t sick during that 4 months I worked there during both the Halloween and Christmas. I felt often too stressed to wash hands properly, because I knew someone could need me now. I don’t know how many messy things, spilled milk or something else I cleaned up. I felt so stressed and then I bite my nails.
Still I wasn’t sick.
After 4 months, I changed to a calm Danish classroom instead.

Of course your should stay home if you are sick, one of my friends always worked non stop for years, his own company plus as a rail road worker. He decided to visit me on the country side and take 1 week holiday, I mean he was close to 50 years old then and had never had a calm moment since he began working as 15 years old.
He came to my place and truly relaxed. Walked for hours in the forest with my dog.
He came back and started to work again and ended up at hospital with a mix of bacterias trying to kill him, yes he almost died.

So lesson learn! Either you take care of yourself now or sometimes later..
 
I'm in the same boat of never taking time off enough. My managers actually make me take vacations sometimes. Work is my most stable routine, and they don't understand such...or understand me enough, still, overall. However, I will absolutely stay home if my stomach is all kinds of messed up. I don't fear public restrooms or anything. I do fear that I might get caught in traffic somewhere that is nowhere close to a bathroom, and that's a horrible, scary thing.
 
Dagan said:
I'm in the same boat of never taking time off enough. My managers actually make me take vacations sometimes. Work is my most stable routine, and they don't understand such...or understand me enough, still, overall. However, I will absolutely stay home if my stomach is all kinds of messed up. I don't fear public restrooms or anything. I do fear that I might get caught in traffic somewhere that is nowhere close to a bathroom, and that's a horrible, scary thing.
Click to expand...
That happened to me before. It is like a nightmare.
 
Back when I was working, I usually had about four colds and influenza each year. The job had a good union, I took days off when I was pretty sick. Colds were the worst, I'd become a massive mucus generator. Couldn't hear or breathe through my nose.
But I'd come back to work while I still had some symptoms- It usually took a month for my head to finally clear out.
Turns out that one is most contagious at the very beginning vague symptoms, So I was going to be infectious to others no matter what?
 
My colleagues would be pretty mad at me if I showed up with a runny nose and coughing all over the place. And I'd feel pretty terrible expecting some of them to be sick the next day because of me. You're certainly not a wimp for wanting to get better faster and not pass your sickness on to your colleagues (and potentially their families, friends, neighbors,...)
 
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