I got employee of the month, unfortunately.

[sharlinski]

I'm the office manager of a small team of people. Four of them are in the field all the time, and our boss is not a good communicator, so I'm the one keeping them in the loop, printing whatever they need, solving problems, etc. They love me, I love them, and they banded together and nominated me for the staff member of the month at the college where we work. It's a huge honor. Too huge, if you know what I mean. I'm way too embarrassed and overwhelmed and uncertain to navigate this comfortably.

Normally they present an award at a chamber of commerce luncheon with the winner's coworkers present, but because of covid they had the luncheon without us. Two weeks ago I was unceremoniously handed my plaque by the communications guy, who then took my picture for the paper. (I don't know why I try to smile in pictures, I'm so bad at it.) Today the president of the college emailed me a link to the recording of the luncheon where my awkward picture was shown on two big screens, while the President read verbatim the details I wrote on the questionnaire they gave me. It was all just very fill-in-the-blanks, checking the Staff Member of the Month box, and didn't really feel like an honor at all.

So the whole process was weird, and I don't know how much gratitude to show my coworkers. I'm a little bit disappointed on their behalf, because if they knew how stressed out I am they would feel bad, and I don't think I've properly conveyed how much their opinion matters to me. The ceremony was a non-starter, but I am really, really grateful that they think so highly of me and the work I do. I thanked them several times and chatted in depth about the whole thing with a couple of them, and I'm just tired now and glad it's over. That's all. Just needed to spill to people who understand.

 

[Judge]

So the whole process was weird, and I don't know how much gratitude to show my coworkers.

I've both served on corporate committees which determined what employee would receive such a distinction, as well as been one who received it.

It is weird- downright awkward. Worse when you discover that the process for choosing persons is less about merit and more about "spreading the good news". Which in my case seemed more like that mentality of people stressing that "everyone wins a trophy". So much for merit, and merit advancement.

Where even if you overtly excel in your job, more likely than not you don't get a raise because it's simply not in the annual budget to do so.

 

[sharlinski]

So much for merit, and merit advancement.

Yeah, that's what it felt like. Just an opportunity for them to manufacture press for themselves. My boss was quite petty about the whole thing, because they never did that for her. lol But the team is mostly very supportive and uplifting, which is what I hope they got out of the whole thing. I would never say any of the above to them, because I want them to keep their good feelings.

Where even if you overtly excel in your job, more likely than not you don't get a raise because it's simply not in the annual budget to do so.

Haha, totally!

 

[Rae Ray]

I'm the office manager of a small team of people. Four of them are in the field all the time, and our boss is not a good communicator, so I'm the one keeping them in the loop, printing whatever they need, solving problems, etc. They love me, I love them, and they banded together and nominated me for the staff member of the month at the college where we work. It's a huge honor. Too huge, if you know what I mean. I'm way too embarrassed and overwhelmed and uncertain to navigate this comfortably.

Normally they present an award at a chamber of commerce luncheon with the winner's coworkers present, but because of covid they had the luncheon without us. Two weeks ago I was unceremoniously handed my plaque by the communications guy, who then took my picture for the paper. (I don't know why I try to smile in pictures, I'm so bad at it.) Today the president of the college emailed me a link to the recording of the luncheon where my awkward picture was shown on two big screens, while the President read verbatim the details I wrote on the questionnaire they gave me. It was all just very fill-in-the-blanks, checking the Staff Member of the Month box, and didn't really feel like an honor at all.

So the whole process was weird, and I don't know how much gratitude to show my coworkers. I'm a little bit disappointed on their behalf, because if they knew how stressed out I am they would feel bad, and I don't think I've properly conveyed how much their opinion matters to me. The ceremony was a non-starter, but I am really, really grateful that they think so highly of me and the work I do. I thanked them several times and chatted in depth about the whole thing with a couple of them, and I'm just tired now and glad it's over. That's all. Just needed to spill to people who understand.

Yeah Sharlinski, I can totally relate with what your saying. When it is all said and done, things like this leaves me totally exhausted.

 

[zozie]

I have an aspie friend who was my coworker when we both were at the same company, and they used employee of the month awards as a way to mitigate sinking morale. I got it after I worked myself to the bone, she also got it for working herself ragged.

Both times, the award was a conspicuous response to "we need to expand the department, so please do something or I think I might have to take more drastic measures."

(Delivered in the totally stone-faced way that (many) aspie women tend to do, without any outward indication of the stress and meltdowns happening off-hours or internally. I had a harder time hiding it, but my coworker tends to be on the quieter side, at least at work.)

I hated all the attention and "corporate bonding" required at office jobs. I hated being in the spotlight in any way, good or bad. I regularly ended up laughing way too loud and long at the wrong thing, and usually I couldn't stop and would almost choke. So embarrassing.

So, solidarity. We get it.

 

[sharlinski]

On a bright note, a lady who comes into the library where I also work recognized me in the paper and struck up a conversation. It was nice.

(And of course I need another job, because they gave me a plaque instead of a raise. lol)

 

[Suzanne]

Tons better than me. I could not cope at all with that kind of environment and would have my head reeling, if in the same situation as you ie being complimented. Whoa, you are brave lol

 

[Meistersinger]

I absolutely despise employee of the month programs, primarily because 90% of the time it’s a popularity contest, and almost always the recipient is an ass kisser.

I was, when I was still employed, the only motivation for employment is to collect your paycheck: nothing more, nothing less.

 

[Bolletje]

Hey, congratulations! I fully understand why it felt awkward for you, but I still think it’s pretty cool that you got the award

 

[Soleil]

I got something like that once. In order to accept, they took my picture (actually several) and I had to go to an awards lunch on my time off, sit through the ceremony, and get the certificate from the general manager in front of a small crowd.

I hated the fuss, the attention, the interruption of my usual "time off" routine. Food was good, but I would never have gone through with all that, but they also gave me a $50 gift card, and I had to go through with all that to get it.

 

[Joshua the Writer]

I wouldn't like getting that award unless I'm self-employed and have the power to give it to myself or a pet. Yeah, I would totally do that.

 

[sharlinski]

Tons better than me. I could not cope at all with that kind of environment and would have my head reeling, if in the same situation as you ie being complimented. Whoa, you are brave lol

Hey, congratulations! I fully understand why it felt awkward for you, but I still think it’s pretty cool that you got the award

Thank you both! I was very touched that my coworkers think that highly of me, but of course I don't know what to do with that emotion, so... It's a vicious cycle. lol Praise me! But not too much. And definitely not publicly.

 

[Bolletje]

Indeed I’m leaving my job at the end of this month after two and a half years. Normally that’s cause for cake and flowers and speeches at our office, but due to COVID-19 everyone is working from home and the festivities are canceled. Can’t say I mind, at all

 

[sharlinski]

I’m leaving my job at the end of this month after two and a half years.

Good luck in your next phase of life!