There must be some kind of way out of here
Said the joker to the thief
There's too much confusion
I can't get no relief
-Bob Dylan, "All Along The Watchtower"
I had to delay the final move by at least a month, since the trailer still needs work and my mom wants to make sure it's done right before I leave so I will have to live there for a few weeks while it's in the backyard to make sure nothing bad pops up.
The thing is, I find that I need to move ASAP. Except for a year and a half in San Francisco in 1994-95 at age 19/20, I've lived in Placer or Sacramento counties my entire life, and most of my adulthood has been spent on land once owned by my grandfather. Everything is familiar, TOO MUCH so. Every street has a bad or embarassing memory, a passing car that looks a certain way can trigger an old memory.
I have to travel to the far northeastern suburbs where I grew up constantly for stuff like doctor appointments, and my childhood was VERY unhappy. I can't drive around too much anymore because it's retreading the same boulevards with the same horrible memories again and again. I keep having to drive past the high school where I was tormented for four long years. I keep having to drive past the entrance to the subdivision where I grew up. I drive the same streets that I have traveled for 46 years, and they all have "strings attached" you could say. I'm sick of it, and it is getting worse, and my mom says "you can't run from your failures in life" but I just need to start over.
Said the joker to the thief
There's too much confusion
I can't get no relief
-Bob Dylan, "All Along The Watchtower"
I had to delay the final move by at least a month, since the trailer still needs work and my mom wants to make sure it's done right before I leave so I will have to live there for a few weeks while it's in the backyard to make sure nothing bad pops up.
The thing is, I find that I need to move ASAP. Except for a year and a half in San Francisco in 1994-95 at age 19/20, I've lived in Placer or Sacramento counties my entire life, and most of my adulthood has been spent on land once owned by my grandfather. Everything is familiar, TOO MUCH so. Every street has a bad or embarassing memory, a passing car that looks a certain way can trigger an old memory.
I have to travel to the far northeastern suburbs where I grew up constantly for stuff like doctor appointments, and my childhood was VERY unhappy. I can't drive around too much anymore because it's retreading the same boulevards with the same horrible memories again and again. I keep having to drive past the high school where I was tormented for four long years. I keep having to drive past the entrance to the subdivision where I grew up. I drive the same streets that I have traveled for 46 years, and they all have "strings attached" you could say. I'm sick of it, and it is getting worse, and my mom says "you can't run from your failures in life" but I just need to start over.
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