I think I can see where a lot of my “worst possible outcome” thinking comes from.

[Metalhead]

Earlier today, my mother gave me a surprise visit. My house is usually spotless and organized, but between my left arm and my left knee being in tons of pain, I decided to let my body rest and get back to the spotless cleaning after I recover, and I am recovering and my house should be clean again in a couple of days.

Because my house was a bit of a mess, I had to get an earful from my mother telling me that if I did not clean my house ASAP and my landlord came to visit, I would immediately be evicted and become homeless.

Thanks a lot, Mrs Doom and Gloom.

She was always jumping to the worst possible outcome if I was not picture perfect in her eyes, and a lot of that rubbed off on me. I need to knock that kind of thinking off.

 

[Neonatal RRT]

Seems to be a human trait that many people are sort of "hardwired" for negativity and fear. I am not one that does this, but I have many people around me that tend to go down these negative paths. It's difficult to talk to people that get really emotional and want to "hammer" in their negative thoughts on other people. Some people simply cannot accept that within any given topic, there are good things and bad things, that we cannot avoid some "collateral damage" when it comes to certain actions. Something could be 90% positive, but all they see is the "devastating consequences" to the other 10%. It's like when your doctor prepares you for a surgical procedure and lists all the potential, but highly unlikely bad outcomes, you only focus on the 0.0001% possibility that you might not wake up from anesthesia, not the 99% chance that you will have a good outcome. OK, at that point, I can't help your psychosis. Your ability to assess risk is highly impaired.

Once I studied these behavior concepts around cognitive biases, perspective taking, and context, it certainly cleared my head, slowed my thinking, allowed me not to have "knee-jerk" responses, and see the whole spectrum of blacks, greys, and whites. It allowed me to have more temperance, in general.

 

[tree]

@Metalhead

And yet, she didn't offer to help (clean anything).

 

[WhitewaterWoman]

@Metalhead

And yet, she didn't offer to help (clean anything).

Exactly!

 

[Judge]

Civil Protection Orders - King County, Washington

Hint-hint...

 

[Metalhead]

And, naturally, she decided to leave behind a bag of overly processed potato starch Styrofoam pseudo food called Veggie Straws. She admitted she did that on purpose because she believed I would not be able to stick to eating actual veggies as a snack for the long haul. She is trying to sabotage my diet. I threw those Veggie Straws away.

Are Veggie Straws Bad For You? - Here Is Your Answer.

 

[tree]

And she will present this as a kindness, since she *knew*
you wouldn't be able to manage your own food intake
in a reasonable way.

 

[Metalhead]

I think the marketing team behind Veggie Straws should be imprisoned for fraud. There is absolutely nothing healthy about them and they have none of the benefits that actual veggies have.

 

[Aspychata]

I think you handled this well, you saw her for what she really was, and how her help wasn't really help, and she had no consideration to even offer to help with anything. You basically see thru her now, you can view her actions in a more deattached manner. l am dealing with someone who is medically held back, and l remind myself to offer choices, give emotional support, give them space, and to treat them with dignity no matter how tired, or frustrated l am. I need to put my needs on the side, and be a support system until their life becomes more manageable. Something that your mother has no understanding of. l have stumbled a bit, but we always talk things out, and sometimes l come up with better solutions.