I was born a gorgeous looker

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

And no one can take it.
There are always more beautiful woman
But I can enjoy my looks each day if that is what I want
I have the looks of an angel.
I should be proud of my beauty, I will not listen to anyone that disagrees.

 

[AGXStarseed]

Hope you learn to develop other interests. Great looks don't get you jobs, or pay for housing. Perhaps you might consider doing some volunteer work to help others who aren't as lucky as you. Just a suggestion.

Agreed.
Beautiful appearances attract eyes and smiles, while Beautiful personalities attract hearts and minds.

 

[Rodafina]

@lovely_darlingprettybaby

"Looks" seem very important to you. I wonder why. Not trying to criticize, just curious why you mention them so often.

Feeling pride seems more appropriate for accomplishments you've made rather than the the structure of your bones and the characteristics of your skin.

 

[Misty Avich]

And no one can take it.
There are always more beautiful woman
But I can enjoy my looks each day if that is what I want
I have the looks of an angel.
I should be proud of my beauty, I will not listen to anyone that disagrees.

Being beautiful can increase confidence levels, and confidence is key to get anywhere in this world.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

Being beautiful can increase confidence levels, and confidence is key to get anywhere in this world.

Yes but anyone build confidence. But some are more confident than others.
I have trauma and illness so I am actually not the most confident. I think people with disabilities often are not.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

@lovely_darlingprettybaby

"Looks" seem very important to you. I wonder why. Not trying to criticize, just curious why you mention them so often.

Feeling pride seems more appropriate for accomplishments you've made rather than the the structure of your bones and the characteristics of your skin.

They are important to me as a woman.

I think it is important to take pride in your appearance as a woman. So I think God gave woman their beauty to be celebrated and embraced.
It is really hard surviving as a woman sometimes because other women are so nasty and a lot of people think it is wrong to say you are beautiful or pretty or gorgeous and it is not in my view and it does not make you the most confident person if you ask me.
People often judge on appearance...if you are pretty you often can too get criticised more especially if you are vain or celebrate your beauty or are vocal or proud of it.
I am proud of my accomplishments too because I love myself a lot more now but still feel a lot of trauma shame and blame and like people are trying to hurt me particularly women.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

Agreed.
Beautiful appearances attract eyes and smiles, while Beautiful personalities attract hearts and minds.

You could have both. Some beautiful people are very nice I know I am.

 

[Rodafina]

They are important to me as a woman.

I think it is important to take pride in your appearance as a woman. So I think God gave woman their beauty to be celebrated and embraced.
It is really hard surviving as a woman sometimes because other women are so nasty and a lot of people think it is wrong to say you are beautiful or pretty or gorgeous and it is not in my view and it does not make you the most confident person if you ask me.
People often judge on appearance...if you are pretty you often can too get criticised more especially if you are vain or celebrate your beauty or are vocal or proud of it.
I am proud of my accomplishments too because I love myself a lot more now but still feel a lot of trauma shame and blame and like people are trying to hurt me particularly women.

Thank you for explaining. I feel differently from you, but I understand your perspective as you describe it.

My biggest hesitation in attaching any sense of self-worth to our looks is that they’re not only subjective, but change over time. If we begin to feel less worthy as we begin to feel less beautiful, that could be problematic.

Additionally, if some people find me attractive and some people do not, nothing about me changes. I am still the same person regardless of what others observe about me physically. Others’ perception of me does not seem like a reliable method of assessing my own self-worth.

 

[Misty Avich]

It's nice to know you're beautiful. Often people on the spectrum say they're ugly. I'm not very satisfied with my looks. My eyes are too close together, my forehead is too small, and my face is too long. I hate it. I wish I looked like my autistic friend, who is naturally beautiful. She was born an odd-looking premature baby and the doctors thought she'd be deformed, but her face formed itself into a normal face and she grew into a beautiful child and a beautiful adult. All the men like her, which is why she has a lot of pride and confidence in herself, despite the sexual abuse she suffered.

 

[Suzanne]

For once someone is being positive about their looks.

I wish I could feel that way about myself, but sadly, each time I catch a look at myself, I shudder with how ugly I look and even though I have been told I am pretty, I wonder what is going on with my mirrors lol

I have a baby picture of myself, which I do admit, I look as cute as anything.

We are funny ie humans. When someone is positive about their looks, we deem it as arrogance and when one is not positive about their looks, we want to raise them up and say how wrong they are.

I have a friend ( wow) and she said the other day that she is no miss world. I laughed and said: yes, but those women are not real. They are heavily made up anyway and some are not that attractive. I have also said before to her, that she is just her. I would not want her to change, because then she would not be her.

However, for the first time, I saw her putting mascara on and wow, it is astonishing what it does for the eyes, because hers were sparking.

Whereas, there is another female I know, who does go around saying that many can't understand why she is with her husband, since she is a stunner and could easily get a better looking man. The thing is, she agrees to this, which, if I am being trueful, I do laugh in my heart, because, although she is not ugly, I would not call her a stunner. But, I think people base it on her sisters, who are indeed, different to herself. As it happens, her husband is not ugly, so not sure why people have said that.

I have learned that it really is: the eye of the beholder. One may deem someone to be amazing looking and someone else things not. It is all down to the kind of person who catches our eyes.

 

[Suzanne]

It's nice to know you're beautiful. Often people on the spectrum say they're ugly. I'm not very satisfied with my looks. My eyes are too close together, my forehead is too small, and my face is too long. I hate it. I wish I looked like my autistic friend, who is naturally beautiful. She was born an odd-looking premature baby and the doctors thought she'd be deformed, but her face formed itself into a normal face and she grew into a beautiful child and a beautiful adult. All the men like her, which is why she has a lot of pride and confidence in herself, despite the sexual abuse she suffered.

We are similar, Misty Avich. In fact, really I am embarrassed with my looks.

Just out of curiousity, how do you feel that your friend?

 

[Dagan]

I've thought deeply on all aspects of looks at one time or another, and there's humor to it, usually. Two people are attracted visually (mostly), they get closer and closer, and then when it's time that they get down to "things"....the lights are off / mostly darkness and don't really see each other, haha.

I've thought about when women wear a lot of make up, to the point that they really do transform, and these are more often than not just everyday NT gals. And I laugh realizing that they intentionally mask more in public than I ever do.

If there's anything bothersome concerning looks and such, it's a few things: I feel bad anytime that I was expected to notice looks and comment on them, but that I don't. I never mean to offend, but it sure sounds that way if whatever woman is upset about it. Oops. I feel weird when people compliment me but also say things like how I should "clean up" more and take advantage of my looks. First, I don't feel like anything special to look at - second, I am never going to be vain or think I'm special to look at - third, it won't matter if I do attract attention because it'll probably either bother me being stared at, or I might just completely not notice because I don't go staring at people intentionally, anyway...or all of the above.

I do notice differences in beauty according to the mainstream standards, but those don't affect me or make me more attracted to a gal. It's never just one aspect, either. There's always a combination of things going on, and it can be any number of combinations. I will have to use famous people to explain: Rebel Wilson is attractive, more attention is given to her lately after a lot of transformation, but I seriously thought she was attractive before her changes. I still feel attracted to Julianne Moore, and she's quite older than I. I think Mindy Kaling and Anna Kendrick are both stunning and attractive. In comparison, I have no attraction at all to Taylor Swift, Lady Gaga, nor did I ever feel attracted to Madonna. I can't really explain it beyond that, I guess.

 

[wards]

I was always classed as ‘fit but not cool’ growing up according to school acquaintances, because I had issues interacting with others I would cut conversations short if people tried to talk to me and I always had the typical Autism neutral to negative face which turned people off from interacting with me.

 

[Dagan]

Yes, the resting grump face often gives others apprehension, and if I realize I'm doing it, I'll just start laughing at myself. Most of the time, I don't realize I'm doing it, though. Oops.

 

[Misty Avich]

We are similar, Misty Avich. In fact, really I am embarrassed with my looks.

Just out of curiousity, how do you feel that your friend?

I like my friend and wouldn't hold a grudge against her because of her looks. Although I do get jealous of people who have what I don't, I still don't show resentment towards them. I hate when people bully you because they're jealous of you.

I just hate my face because I look too much like my dad. While my dad is good-looking, it's not so attractive for a woman to look like it, if you get what I mean. I often worry that I look too much like a man. I don't wear make-up only lipstick sometimes. Maybe I should put some foundation on and shape my eyebrows, see if that works. I don't like plucking my eyebrows though, as it stings and I'm sensitive to it.

 

[Aspychata]

I found this post triggering, not the OP's fault. I have been sexually harassed in soooo many jobs, l was raped, and stalked for four years. I find being attractive more of an issue to deal with. And kicked out of my home as a teenager for issues with my stepfather. But l am glad you found a bright light and appreciate your beauty. And l am trying to appreciate myself. Also hope the OP goes thru life way better then l did. I hope you have better luck then me @lovely_darlingprettybaby

 

[Misty Avich]

I found this post triggering, not the OP's fault. I have been sexually harassed in soooo many jobs, l was raped, and stalked for four years. I find being attractive more of an issue to deal with. And kicked out of my home as a teenager for issues with my stepfather. But l am glad you found a bright light and appreciate your beauty. And l am trying to appreciate myself. Also hope the OP goes thru life way better then l did.

That's how my attractive friend feels, even though she's heavily into beauty and spends most of her time applying a lot of make-up perfectly, even though she's still attractive without it. She's also very fashionable, thin and has nicely styled hair.
I'm just a plain sugar-addicted tomboy chav. Not very appealing. Don't know what my husband sees in me lol.

 

[kriss72]

I think we tend to be more critical of our looks than others are, nothing bad in that, I see a great deal of asymmetry in my own face, but I really don't think that is what others see, they probably see the age and gray/white hair that is taking over my look thou - I usually say it is a sign of wisdom, not age (being an autism forum, I don't see myself as wise, it is just a thing I find fun to say)