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Inappropriate dreams

exiledpartitioner

exiledpartitioner

New Member
So, throughout my life, I haven't had many close friendships. I spent time around a few of my cousins, and didn't have friends until I was an adult. I never really knew how to socialize, and had no interest in socializing, because the kids my age were concerned with trivial things. I was more into memorizing facts about animals, and rock collecting, and they were trying to date in kindergarten...

Anyway, as a child, I developed crushes on family members, but only those whom I didn't live with. This was unknown to them until I was a teenager. That doesn't happen anymore as I've made connections outside of my family.haha I had a dream last night, a rather vivid dream about my cousin, and I've had dreams about family members before, and I believe that it is my subconscious manifesting my closeness with these family members that is causing these dreams.

I am really weirded out, and am unsure how to face my cousin. The images are still so vivid.haha
 
We all can have what I consider to be "dark thoughts" from time to time. It would seem though what really matters is whether or not you are prepared to act on such thoughts. In this instance though I'm not sure this even constitutes such a thing in a purely legal sense.

Anyways if not, they're just dreams you need not share. No harm, no foul.
 
Rather than going with the attitude that you must be embarrassed
by your dreams, you could try analyzing them.

Since they were dreams, and you were the dreamer, ask yourself
in what way you are like each person in the dream. Also, how the
situation in the dream resembles your own life. "How am I like..."
being a question to ask yourself. "In what way is this me?"

I have found this type of Gestalt dream analysis helpful to me.
 
tree said:
Rather than going with the attitude that you must be embarrassed
by your dreams, you could try analyzing them.

Since they were dreams, and you were the dreamer, ask yourself
in what way you are like each person in the dream. Also, how the
situation in the dream resembles your own life. "How am I like..."
being a question to ask yourself. "In what way is this me?"

I have found this type of Gestalt dream analysis helpful to me.
Click to expand...
I also think that they stem from my admiration of each, and I do practice introspection, but there are blocks at times.
 
I find it fascinating to analyze my dreams that I can actually recall. Where they usually project some kind of metaphor (such as fear of failure) or simply as a reaction to something I witnessed or read about that truly disturbs me- especially on a subconscious level.

More often than not I end up chuckling at myself for how my mind works. :p
 
Judge said:
We all can have what I consider to be "dark thoughts" from time to time. It would seem though what really matters is whether or not you are prepared to act on such thoughts. In this instance though I'm not sure this even constitutes such a thing in a purely legal sense.

Anyways if not, they're just dreams you need not share. No harm, no foul.
Click to expand...
I have no intention of acting upon them, believe me. It was just something that was common during my childhood. I have never thought about her in that way, and I admire nothing about her, so I am at a loss. Maybe in a week or two, my discomfort will subside, and I will have become distracted by other things.
 
exiledpartitioner said:
I have no intention of acting upon them, believe me. It was just something that was common during my childhood. I have never thought about her in that way, and I admire nothing about her, so I am at a loss. Maybe in a week or two, my discomfort will subside, and I will have become distracted by other things.
Click to expand...

Like I said, no harm, no foul. Don't sweat it. ;)

Who knows...it could be a metaphor for something you just haven't figured out.

-Yet.
 
Two things:
  1. Sexualized dreams happen (and they can get weird). You can't stop them, but you can minimize them by staying away from porn and maintaining a modest relationship with your cousin.
  2. Cousins can appeal as strongly as non-relatives. They can even legally marry in some places. So, your attraction is not unprecedented.
 
I cannot remember what age this occurred, but I was sleeping over at my gran's place with a sister and it was in the living room, when I woke up in tears and very frightened, because I had dreamt that my ENTIRE family were on drugs. Now, as a grown woman, that is still vivid on how I felt, but I cannot for the life of me think why it FREAKED me out so much, but perhaps it had something to do with the fact that in the 80's, glue sniffing was a common feature in the news and perhaps it just got through to my subconscious and that caused the dream.

I was fixed on the fear that I would become a drug addicted; it was like I had no control and I would be forced or something and so, when I dealt with glue, I would hold my breath lol

I also remember a new shop opening called: superdrugs and I was like: oh my goodness me, they even have a shop for drugs now :rolleyes:

I eventually learned the difference between medicine and recreation drugs.

I see dreams are a manifestation of our subconcious.
 
exiledpartitioner said:
I have no intention of acting upon them, believe me. It was just something that was common during my childhood. I have never thought about her in that way, and I admire nothing about her, so I am at a loss. Maybe in a week or two, my discomfort will subside, and I will have become distracted by other things.
Click to expand...

Read some books about dream analysis.

I read one years ago. The author had a dream about sleeping with her brother. Which thought had never entered her conscious mind.
So,for her, it was mlre about what the dream represented.

Strange dream, yes. Problem? Unlikely.
 
Any random thought can come into your head or into your dreams. You have as much control over it as you do over junk mail in your mailbox.

What you do with it is up to you. You can decide to accept it or reject it.
 
It's only a dream that you have little or no control over, so I wouldn't concern yourself too much about it, but it's common for people to have sexual dreams if they've been without sex for a while, it's almost like your subconscious attempting to kick your arse into action, but it won't necessarily choose the best person for you. It's also allegedly more common for autistic people to have more unusual sexual desires, but I understand that it is perfectly legal to have a sexual relationship with a cousin and even marry in the vast majority of countries since there is only a very slightly higher chance of it leading to birth defects than with someone totally outside of the family. That said I have what many other people have considered as two very attractive female cousins that are only slightly older than me (they've long been married now), yet I personally have never had any sexual attraction towards either of them even when I was much younger, but I have come across people who are in a sexual relationship with their cousin, so as long as it's legal in your country it's not even totally out of the question if you both happen to be interested in each-other (some families might still be against it however which could cause complications).
 
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The only kind of dream that can linger in my mind is when I suspect it might be what I consider "a visitation". Which may not really be a dream at all. Though they don't happen very often for me.

Of course I don't count things like hypnopompic hallucinations to be in that realm either.
 
Judge said:
The only kind of dream that can linger in my mind is when I suspect it might be what I consider "a visitation". Which may not really be a dream at all. Though they don't happen very often for me.

Of course I don't count things like hypnopompic hallucinations to be in that realm either.
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That's really interesting, especially your "visitations", perhaps you should keep a dream dairy as you may find you have a lot more dreams and perhaps even visitations than you realise, in fact we normally dream every night, but often don't remember them. To do this you basically need to keep a pen and paper next to your bed and write down quick notes about any dreams you remember immediately upon waking before you forget them, later you will often forget and will be very surprised at what you've written, if you then concentrate and try to remember again in as much detail as possible with the help of what you've written you can train your brain over time to start to remember your dreams much better by counting them as important information that should be stored in long term memory. This can allegedly have a side effect of also remembering any astral projection experiences should you wish to attempt it (I have) and it can also allegedly improve psychic abilities.
 
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@exiledpartitioner
I would agree with your idea that the dreams maybe be coming from the fact that you don't bond or care to socialise with anyone except family.
I grew up the same. I didn't care for befriending other kids or peers.
I only felt comfortable and wanted to be with immediate family. They were the only ones I could truly trust and feel unconditional love from.

So with keeping your love within the family only theme, the dream may have taken on the desire for sexual undertones as a form of love. But your ability to only feel close to family put a family member in that position.
Make sense?

I've only had a couple of sexual dreams in my life,
(and I am a very prolific, lucid dreamer so I think I would remember), and they were of some movie actors.
I do not find the two I dreamt of being with physically attractive, so my subconscious must have had a different type of attraction, yet it came out as sexual in the dreams.
I can probably interpret the reasons.
One was an action hero type characture, strong, brave.
Probably the desire for someone I would want as a protector type in my life.
The second was a comic type.
This was probably a desire for a fun loving comical pal.
 
pjcnet said:
That's really interesting, especially your "visitations", perhaps you should keep a dream dairy as you may find you have a lot more dreams and perhaps even visitations than you realise, in fact we normally dream every night, but often don't remember them. To do this you basically need to keep a pen and paper next to your bed and write down quick notes about any dreams you remember immediately upon waking before you forget them, later you will often forget and will be very surprised at what you've written, if you then concentrate and try to remember again in as much detail as possible with the help of what you've written you can train your brain over time to start to remember your dreams much better by counting them as important information that should be stored in long term memory. This can allegedly have a side effect of also remembering any astral projection experiences should you wish to attempt it (I have) and it can also allegedly improve psychic abilities.
Click to expand...

I went through a stage many years ago when I did record those dreams I remember. Of course the real gist of it were dreams I could recall versus those I couldn't. Which reflects yet another mystery to me. That some no matter how hard they are to recall never come back to me in my mind other than in bits and pieces.

I've only had two incidents where I gave much thought to them being manifestations of astral projection. They were so profound to me that I'm still "working the problem" in that sense. Though in both cases I was upright and sitting, and lapsed into a deep sleep. So my concern of hypnogogic and hypnopompic hallucinations remains part of that equation.

Psychic abilities? Well, let's just say that a few people in my life have told me I was a "sensitive".
 
I’ve had some very weird, sometimes pretty graphic dreams about friends, family members and acquaintances. I usually just shake it off, pretend it never happened, and try not to read too much into it.
My dreams are pretty weird as a rule, so I just chalk it up to that.
 
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