Intense Fear

[KevinMao133]

One of my biggest fears: the fear of judgements

it has gotten so bad that basically talking to strangers is anxious

everytime I go to a new place, I am bound to be hit with questions like: “oh how are you? What’s your name blah blah blah.” Stuff like that

Self introduction in public, impossible, because I have nothing to share. I don’t do how to self introduce myself

Also I find it very tough talking in groups, even to individuals in a one on one setting

unable to express my true feelings and thoughts

 

[Slim Jim]

Depending on the day,hour , minute, I can be the most personable talker. Or as lively as a statue. I wish I could control it.

One on one, is generally no problem. Crowds, Sure, You can sometimes feel... out of place. Of course, I generally avoid crowds, If I can help it. Or just block them out, If I can't.

 

[KevinMao133]

Depending on the day,hour , minute, I can be the most personable talker. Or as lively as a statue. I wish I could control it.

One on one, is generally no problem. Crowds, Sure, You can sometimes feel... out of place. Of course, I generally avoid crowds, If I can help it. Or just block them out, If I can't.

for me it really depends on the person. I need love, as I never received any growing up so the insecurity is there. Also I can never express my thoughts without worrying about others judging me

I will give you an example: I prefer dating older women. Like I’m 25, I would like to date women who’s over 35, preferably 40. Yet the crazy thing I am unable to express it and even when the opportunity rises, I am unable to go after

 

[Slim Jim]

A man , trying to involve himself with a woman , 15 years older. Some might say "For Shame!"

Of course...not me. I don't have many fixed rules.

Spoiler

My type, For. e.g. Emma stone. Very attractive. Same age as me.

Damn, this has degenerate from Fear into Lust. Can we Get any Lower... Shame on me.

 

[LadyS]

One of things that took me a long time to realize is that no one thinks of you the way you think of you. We're all our own worst critics. We think that others are analyzing us and judging us but in reality they don't think about others too much in depth because they're too busy thinking about themselves.

Research Confirms That No One Is Really Thinking About You

Sometimes someone might make a stinging comment about something you said, did, or about your appearance and while we continue to dwell on it, that person doesn't and moves on. They don't dwell on it but we do unfortunately. Best thing is to brush it off and let it go which is easier said than done. The thing I'm still working on is putting too much power into others, because we're all of us trying to fit in somewhere, not just me. Everyone is insecure in some aspect. That makes it easier to not be afraid.

 

[Wolfnox]

One of things that took me a long time to realize is that no one thinks of you the way you think of you. We're all our own worst critics. We think that others are analyzing us and judging us but in reality they don't think about others too much in depth because they're too busy thinking about themselves.

Research Confirms That No One Is Really Thinking About You

Sometimes someone might make a stinging comment about something you said, did, or about your appearance and while we continue to dwell on it, that person doesn't and moves on. They don't dwell on it but we do unfortunately. Best thing is to brush it off and let it go which is easier said than done. The thing I'm still working on is putting too much power into others, because we're all of us trying to fit in somewhere, not just me. Everyone is insecure in some aspect. That makes it easier to not be afraid.

I would add unless it benefits them to that. Given recent events.

 

[Tom]

When I was small I was absolutely terrified of earwigs.

But they aren't really that bad.

"The earwig gets its skin-crawling name from long-standing myths claiming the insect can climb inside a person’s ear and either live there or feed on their brain. While any small insect is capable of climbing in your ear, this myth is unfounded. Earwigs don’t feed on the human brain or lay their eggs in your ear canal." (Healthline.Com)

In fact as omnivores they serve an important place in ecology and can help control other more harmful insects.

In recognition of their contributions, Latvia even named them 'Insect of the Year' in 2021.

All eyes and ears on the earwig in 2021!

So earwigs don't frighten me anymore, and I don't automatically kill those I find in the house if I can capture and release outside. Instead I invite a friend over and have them sleep on a futon on the floor. And when the earwig crawls in their ear I drag them outside and shake their head till it falls out.

 

[Aspychata]

We will always have haters, and a fan club. My family was always my hate club. When l left, l found that l could and did have friends.

You need to give yourself a chance. I also realize that there are many insecure people so you can't claim that special role only for you. Lol

 

[Neonatal RRT]

One of my biggest fears: the fear of judgements

it has gotten so bad that basically talking to strangers is anxious

everytime I go to a new place, I am bound to be hit with questions like: “oh how are you? What’s your name blah blah blah.” Stuff like that

Self introduction in public, impossible, because I have nothing to share. I don’t do how to self introduce myself

Also I find it very tough talking in groups, even to individuals in a one on one setting

unable to express my true feelings and thoughts

Welcome to the wonderful world of autism. Even the most sociable, "highly functioning" autistic, by their very nature, will likely experience some level of anxiety in social situations. I highly dislike answering the door,...I will either NOT,...or will literally tell my wife to do it, despite her protests. I hate the phone,...if it is important,...leave a message or text. With my job as a respiratory therapist,...I am basically put into an environment where I am forced to socially interact,...it is what it is,...and after all these years of just doing it,...still don't like it,...still am not good at it,...and would simply prefer to just be left alone to do my job. When my work phone rings,...that split second,...anger,...then I have to compose myself,...3, 4, 5 rings,...then answer in my "customer service voice". When a text goes through,...again, that little notification "buzz" and sound,...my first impulse is to ignore it,...and I might not even click onto the message for quite a while.

Self introduction to a patient's family is still with some anxiety and awkwardness. Self introduction to a class of students is actually easier,...still can be awkward,...as it is less "personal" when standing in front of a group. Yes,...I still have that inner monologue with myself,..."What should I bring up about myself?" "How much time is appropriate to talk about myself?"..."How to I throw the topic back to them in order for them to talk about themselves?" Oh, this discussion in my head can go on and on,....and never ends up the way I think it should go,...more awkwardness. I can have "limited conversation" with other people, one-on-one,...but with 2 or more people, I still don't have the skills to jump in and out of a multi-person discussion without being clumsy. I may have plenty to say,...but then the conversation moves on to a different topic,...and I am left behind with all this information just pent up and unable to release. Now, I actually do best in a lecture situation where I can talk for hours, elaborating on a topic I know very well,...I have a habit of running over the time given to me.

 

[Slim Jim]

Yeah, I have such reluctance to do those things too. It doesn't phase me, in the moment. Though I might find it unnatural at times. If my back is to the wall, and I have to deal with somebody, in person, on phone, I will. And I'll do it to the best of my ability. But I have no inclinations to enter into such circumstance, generally. I'd rather be left alone, to do what I want to do,a t any given moment. And it's easy to get annoyed, if I have to deal with something, I didn't want to.