Introducing Myself

[BK111]

I'm Brandon.

Essentially, I am here because I want to get to know more people with the condition I have. I am currently self-diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, but I will find out tomorrow if I have the condition or not. However, I greatly suspect I do since I was diagnosed with autism at age 3 (I am now 19.); this diagnosis, however, was rejected for Dystonic Cerebral Palsy at age 5. This proved to be the better diagnosis for me as I was able to be in regular public education. At the time I did not suspect I had Asperger's because my parents never brought up this possibility with me. For my father, while he wanted to bring this up to me at one point in my adolescent years, he did not, arguing that it would be best for me to find out for myself if I have it or not. And my mother denied the very possibility that I had Asperger's Syndrome and never wanted my father to bring this condition up with me.

Even the symptoms for Asperger's, though, did not begin to emerge until I got to college. I attend St. John's College in Santa Fe, NM, USA, the most rigorous college in the country that goes by the Great Books Program, a program that makes everyone do everything. So everyone does mathematics and history and philosophy and language and music and so forth. This has been a worthwhile experience; but what I found there was that I could not find the "whole." I had the "parts," but I could not understand how this part related to that other part and the part way over there. It's hard to bring everything together unless if I am discussing these concepts with my peers in class. The process of doing this, though, as much as it proves itself insightful, it is quite stressful. Whether I am demonstrating different concepts of math on the board, translating a sentence from Ancient Greek to English on the board, attempting to relate my "part" to the "fuller" conversation at hand, understanding how something theoretical can apply physically in our world, or relating to the musical notes on a page, I find it hard to relate the "part," me and what I have noticed, to the "whole," what is discussed or done at hand.

I am on this forum because, as I said before, I want to get to know more people with this condition. But I also am looking for help with living with my everyday symptoms of Asperger's Syndrome.

My interests are very diverse, but nevertheless they all group themselves together in the end:

--Food / Veganism

--Individual Behavior / Group Behavior (Sociology, Cultural Anthropology, Cultural Geography, Social Philosophy)

--Mythology and Religions

--Foreign Film

--Writing

--People's Problems

They all relate in the end because these the things that bring people together and then allow us to see how these people behave. I am interested, ultimately, in one thing, and that is understanding the question of "What brings people together?" and "Why do people trust each other so much?" So, in short, human behavior.

I think this is enough said about me. I look forward to speaking with all of you in the future.

 

[Peace]

Hello BK111,
I think you may come to discover that it does not matter what you have or what it is called, as long as you understand it and how to best work with it to achieve what you want. I hope being here helps you to find what you are looking for. I have never met anyone else with Aspergers (that I know of), and may never do so. I too though look for the same thing. Other people that I can relate to, or that can relate to me. Usually, it is people that think I am a freak, or people that marvel at my ability to speak or understand things,etc, or those who just tolerate me. I think we all long for acceptance, understanding and friendship.
Good luck.

 

[BK111]

Thank you, Peace, for your kind words. I will definitely take them into my examination today.

 

[Geordie]

Hi Brandon,

I am sure you have overcome a great deal. This is great!

I am sure we have a place where everyone accepts each other as what we are.

Btw the Program is a great program with lots of different required reading. You may emphasize that because you worked hard for it, so I can definitely see it, and I am really happy and proud for you to have reached thus far in life. I may not be part of some liberal arts program, but I hear classmates and friends who experienced similar programs in similar liberal arts colleges (there could only be a few Great Books programs, so ). Perhaps the 'whole' is in the essence of life, that is, life is mostly good but we need to look at ideas with a holistic and critical point of view. How do we further examine that... Hmm, it is a never ending process, and we keep doing it because we want to know more and understand better, no?

Nevertheless, when the tasks ahead are overwhelming, I can offer you a big virtual hug, if you allow me to

 

[BK111]

Geordie,

Your heartfelt words are most appreciated. I have to say that the Great Books Program is very helpful for my case because what it allows me to do is to listen while enjoying very great conversations and great classics of Western literature. But it is more helpful in the immediate term with my Don Rag advice--"To look more at the whole and to switch between looking at the Part and the Whole." Personally, what I have found is this: To look at the "whole" is to look at the relationships between the parts and wonder how those relationships came to be in such and such fashion. I find this difficult because I feel as though I find "sums," just conglomerates of "parts" without understanding the relationships between them. It is so hard for me to understand these parts--and this struggle throughout my Freshman year of college led me to getting tested for Asperger's--which I am confirmed officially. I hope that the Great Books Program along with psychotherapy will allow me to look for this elusive "whole" that I am yet to find.

Your hug is mostly appreciated. *hugs*

 

[Heissonear]

Hello Brandon.

I too struggled with learning a wide range of college subjects. Big time struggle. I made some D,s just to get padt speech, anthropology, and a few others.

I hope thid forum helps inform you that you are not alone. Keep on learning!