Is it alright to feel sad in this context?

[mysterionz]

One of my coworkers that I had a relatively close friendship with has put in his two weeks at the job I work with. I feel kinda sad as he was a good friend.. said he likes discussing South Park with me.. I’m gonna miss that.. never saw me as different for being autistic and having a strong interest in the tv show South Park. Ryan, if you see this, I wish you good luck in whatever you do in the future.

im sitting in the couch watching the casa Bonita episode trying to cheer myself up.

 

[Mr. Stevens]

I think it's normal to feel sad in that situation. For me, it's helpful to understand why I feel something, rather than wonder if it's right or wrong. I don't know if feelings are ever wrong. It sounds like you understand why you're sad, since this person accepted you.

 

[Rodafina]

Feeling sad right now is very reasonable and logical. You’re losing something that was positive in your life and that is a sad thing. Even if your friend is going on to something that is good for them, it is still a loss for you and it is perfectly fine to be sad.

 

[Stuttermabolur]

It's okay to be sad in any context. There's no need for people to justify their feelings. Whether it's sadness, anger or happiness, feelings don't need a good reason to exist, they just do. If course it can be a problem if they are severely affecting you over a longer time, but they don't get reasoned away just like that. Our emotions are ultimately a part of us, no matter how frustrating that can be, and so we shouldn't view them as enemies even when we don't like them.

In this case it sounds like you had a close friendship with someone who valued you in a way not a lot of people in your life do. It's up to you how you view this of course, but in a way you are honoring him. You wouldn't feel this sadness if he hadn't respected you, and to have had such a positive effect on someone that they get sad when you leave is honestly what I strive for.

You are not carrying this sadness alone, as I'm sure many members of the forum know the feeling of being left behind and want the best for you. It's difficult to lose a friend. I hope you have some way to stay in touch, even if it's less frequent.

 

[Nitro]

It's ok to be sad that you will no longer see him at work,
but just because the two of you will no longer be working together doesn't mean a friendship has ended.

I have two extremely good friends I worked with years ago.
Mike has been a part of my world since 1980.
We both moved on with other opportunities, but still remained in contact.
Guy, who I just saw in person last Monday entered into my world roughly 30 years ago.
We last worked together 26 years ago.

 

[VictorR]

I hear you. I've lost many work friends as a result of one of us leaving. Interacting with someone every day (or close enough), sharing common interests, and supporting each other when you've had a difficult client or meeting, etc. can lead to strong bonds and connections.

Alas, even with swapping contact details, it's just not the same when you don't have the regular and natural interaction, and I don't know how it is for you, but I'm not usually one to initiate contact, and lots of people I like are kind of similar in that regard, so through mutual lack of contact we just drift apart.

Perhaps you could create some reminders for yourself to check in every now and then with them to keep the connection going?

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

Yes, a person who has meaning to your life is moving to different pastures. That does not mean that your friendship is ending. Do you know if he would like to maintain contact? I wish you all the best in maintaining the friendship.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

Casa Bonita, OMG. i didn't see the episode but went there when I saw it in Roadside America. Weird and crazy place.

 

[Raggamuffin]

You can always keep in touch outside of work.

I went to the same school for 11 years and my first job for nearly 10. Saw a lot of friends come and go in that time.

If you're willing to put in the time and effort, you can stay friends with anyone, no matter where in the world they end up.

Ed

 

[Owliet]

One of my coworkers that I had a relatively close friendship with has put in his two weeks at the job I work with. I feel kinda sad as he was a good friend.. said he likes discussing South Park with me.. I’m gonna miss that.. never saw me as different for being autistic and having a strong interest in the tv show South Park. Ryan, if you see this, I wish you good luck in whatever you do in the future.

im sitting in the couch watching the casa Bonita episode trying to cheer myself up.

Yes. It’s perfectly alright to feel like this. I hope that you are able to stay in contact with your colleague.=)

 

[Judge]

It's perfectly understandable to be sad about such happenings. Reminds me of when my boss the underwriting manager left the corporation and poached my best friend at work, along with my underwriting assistant.

At work, socially things were never the same after that. Three years later I too left the company, having been tipped off that the shareholders were intending to sell or merge with an outside entity. I had enough of that place and left to retrain for a year as a web designer.

In looking back at decades of employment, it always seemed a bit bizarre- and equally predictable that when people quit their jobs they leave their social contacts behind them. It still stings that years later I tried to rekindle that working friendship by contacting him on the Internet, and clearly he had moved on, not wanting to communicate with me. Which forced me to answer a very difficult question. "What makes for a real friendship?"

- I haven't the slightest idea anymore. Small wonder in retirement I live in near isolation. It's true, that for some of us, our lives will not result in happy endings.