It angers me when people are nasty to fat people

[SunnyDay16]

I don't condone obesity, as it's no question that it's unhealthy on every level. With that being said though, the way people treat people a little heavier on the scale has always aggravated me. From calling them awful names, to dehumanizing them, and failing to treat them with basic decency all because they're fat.

I've seen it with my own two eyes and I've seen tons of people say how different they're treated when they gain weight. And not because of them having a harder time finding dates or jobs, but just people not using basic manners with them or being flat out nasty.

There are so many factors that affect obesity, that it can't simply be summed as just laziness or gluttony. And yeah, while poor diet and lack of exercise tend to factor in, there are usually symptoms of bigger problems such as depression or sense of worthlessness. If somebody is depressed or feeling worthless, we shouldn't call them dehumanizing names or make fun of them for it, we should show compassion to them and try to help them. Why should obesity be any different?

 

[Pats]

I totally agree with everything you've said here. I know people that weight is the only important thing in life. I was always thin and then I hit 50 and soon after retired. 50 your metabolism just changes and there's not much you can do about it. I know I'm also not as active (not working and running up and down halls) . My daughter in law is always commenting on how little I eat but I've definitely added pounds over the last 10 years. I think with women it might be related to the changes in hormones, since after menopause it almost always happens.
But even before I hated hearing it and in today's society that you're not allowed to say this or that or make comments about this person or that person, it's still okay to make fun of people that's overweight. That and religion seems to be the only things left that you're allowed to make fun of.
But then today it seems you have to fit into a mold that society has made up. This is the same society that will try to pass laws protecting hamsters (yes) and yet it's okay to dehumanize certain groups of people.

 

[Mary Terry]

It's a shame that society makes fun of anyone who is different from them. Most people view the cause of obesity as a lack of discipline which they believe can be addressed and changed by the over-eater. Where I live in the deep South, obesity and poverty are rampant, usually accompanied by lack of education.

I did chuckle at your word choice that you have "seen tons of people say how different they're treated when they gain weight".

 

[SunnyDay16]

I totally agree with everything you've said here. I know people that weight is the only important thing in life. I was always thin and then I hit 50 and soon after retired. 50 your metabolism just changes and there's not much you can do about it. I know I'm also not as active (not working and running up and down halls) . My daughter in law is always commenting on how little I eat but I've definitely added pounds over the last 10 years. I think with women it might be related to the changes in hormones, since after menopause it almost always happens.
But even before I hated hearing it and in today's society that you're not allowed to say this or that or make comments about this person or that person, it's still okay to make fun of people that's overweight. That and religion seems to be the only things left that you're allowed to make fun of.
But then today it seems you have to fit into a mold that society has made up. This is the same society that will try to pass laws protecting hamsters (yes) and yet it's okay to dehumanize certain groups of people.

I do believe in freedom of speech (that is, the government shouldn't try to regulate speech) but that doesn't mean people shouldn't be criticized for the stuff they say. Unfortunately, in this society it's pretty common for people to mock fat people without being called out for it.

 

[SunnyDay16]

It's a shame that society makes fun of anyone who is different from them. Most people view the cause of obesity as a lack of discipline which they believe can be addressed and changed by the over-eater. Where I live in the deep South, obesity and poverty are rampant, usually accompanied by lack of education.

I did chuckle at your word choice that you have "seen tons of people say how different they're treated when they gain weight".

Yeah, lack of self-discipline is a big part of many obesity cases, but the lack of self-discipline is again usually a symptom of a much bigger issue. When you feel terrible about yourself and feel hopeless, you don't really have the motivation to enforce it. Just making it soley a matter of self-discipline is dismissive and overly simplistic.

 

[Monachopia]

For some reason unknown to me I was a chubby child, my sister and I were fed the same, yet I just had a little extra padding and she didn't... I lived in a country where bigger children were an anomaly and the constant teasing and name-calling scarred me for life. What can a 5-6 year old do against it? Nothing. If anything it subsequently fuelled an unhealthy relationship with food for the rest of my life which took years to correct.

Having said that though, there is a difference between overweight and obese. I would never EVER make someone feel bad about their weight or appearance having gone through it myself, there's just no need. They know it's unhealthy they don't need to constantly hear it. Like yourself I don't understand how people can be outright nasty for no reason other than to make themselves feel 'good' while tearing someone else down. It's pathetic. There are more reasons than laziness or lack of self-discipline. I've been morbidly obese before and it's a hole that seems impossible to get out of. I've lost the weight, but it's very difficult - a) to lose it and b) to keep it off. Those people who criticise most probably don't truly know how difficult it can be mentally or physically.

 

[Mary Terry]

I totally agree with everything you've said here. I know people that weight is the only important thing in life. I was always thin and then I hit 50 and soon after retired. 50 your metabolism just changes and there's not much you can do about it. I know I'm also not as active (not working and running up and down halls) . My daughter in law is always commenting on how little I eat but I've definitely added pounds over the last 10 years. I think with women it might be related to the changes in hormones, since after menopause it almost always happens.
But even before I hated hearing it and in today's society that you're not allowed to say this or that or make comments about this person or that person, it's still okay to make fun of people that's overweight. That and religion seems to be the only things left that you're allowed to make fun of.
But then today it seems you have to fit into a mold that society has made up. This is the same society that will try to pass laws protecting hamsters (yes) and yet it's okay to dehumanize certain groups of people.

My metabolism changed about age 60, too. I was always actually a little underweight until I retired and started getting into cooking as a hobby. I'm a normal weight but I monitor what I eat in order to stay this way so I avoid desserts and watch my cholesterol intake.

 

[Mary Terry]

Yeah, lack of self-discipline is a big part of many obesity cases, but the lack of self-discipline is again usually a symptom of a much bigger issue. When you feel terrible about yourself and feel hopeless, you don't really have the motivation to enforce it. Just making it soley a matter of self-discipline is dismissive and overly simplistic.

It seems to be a cycle for many people - they overeat because they are depressed, they are depressed because they overeat, and it takes something significant to break that cycle. Mental illnesses can also be involved such as borderline personality disordered people who are often binge eaters.

 

[SunnyDay16]

For some reason unknown to me I was a chubby child, my sister and I were fed the same, yet I just had a little extra padding and she didn't... I lived in a country where bigger children were an anomaly and the constant teasing and name-calling scarred me for life. What can a 5-6 year old do against it? Nothing. If anything it subsequently fuelled an unhealthy relationship with food for the rest of my life which took years to correct.

Having said that though, there is a difference between overweight and obese. I would never EVER make someone feel bad about their weight or appearance having gone through it myself, there's just no need. They know it's unhealthy they don't need to constantly hear it. Like yourself I don't understand how people can be outright nasty for no reason other than to make themselves feel 'good' while tearing someone else down. It's pathetic. There are more reasons than laziness or lack of self-discipline. I've been morbidly obese before and it's a hole that seems impossible to get out of. I've lost the weight, but it's HARD AF - a) to lose it and b) to keep it off. Those people who criticise most probably don't truly know how difficult it can be mentally or physically.

I'm really sorry you had to go through that. People's true colours can really shine through when they see someone who is a little different from the norm.

 

[disconnected]

It’s true. When I was on meds I topped out at 262 lbs and people where douches. I went off meds and lost 80 lbs and people treated me completely different.

 

[tducey]

I'm big and have been made fun of for it. Got to try to lose some weight though.

 

[onlything]

Agreed. Unfortunately, people always look for someone 'weak' in a social sense to mock and belittle to boost their own low self-esteems or to feed their pathetic egos. Remember nerd/bookworms/solitary kids at schools as early as primary or even preschool? It's everywhere and not only towards the obese.

 

[Autistamatic]

I'm no bloater but I put weight on in the last decade. I'm 48 now and I've had mobility difficulties since my late 20s due to spinal arthritis. I took a desk job because it's easier to cope with but it's far less active than I used to be. I eat like a mouse but I just don't burn energy the way I once did. I've put on a couple of stone in the last few years. I've never been ridiculed for it, but then fat-shaming is something I've rarely seen in this country (UK)
I've had the P1$$ taken out of me for so many reasons but my weight has never been one of them

 

[TempeFan]

Front page news in the local paper last week proclaimed that the state where I live has the highest percentage of obese people in America. I remember the first time I walked into a West Virginia McDonald's. It was packed and I was the second skinniest person there, as my husband weighed the same as me but is 4 inches taller. I used to be a size 7 and ate 3 big meals per day with decadent deserts at night while sitting behind a desk 8-12 hours per day snacking. Now I have to go to extremes undereating and overexercising to maintain size 18. I work out for hours 5-6 days per week and get two diet meals with high protein lean meat and green vegtables every day and only eat cake twice a year on our birthdays. Menopause sucks!

I've heard that for every 500 dieters trying to lose weight, there is 1 person trying just as hard to gain. I just saw a show on tv where one lady was dying from anorexia and had her doctors operate on her brain so that she would finally let herself eat a sandwich. Then there are some sturdy strong BBWs at our gym. So many factors contribute to gaining extra pounds, but the only things known to work for weight loss is mental/physical/social illness, coma, death and enough wealth to hire a great plastic surgeon.

The way I look at it, if you are healthy enough to get through your daily routines every day, you're doing good enough.

 

[Progster]

Obesity is and should be regarded as a medical condition which may be caused by lifestyle choices, but also exacerbated by other factors beyond our control - mental health issues or genetics, hormone levels and that individual's metabolism. People who are obese should be helped to lose weight if their weight is causing health problems, to exercise and become healthy, mentally and physically, and not shunned or made fun of. A person's body is personal to them and people have no business to judge.

 

[Monachopia]

but then fat-shaming is something I've rarely seen in this country (UK)

I hate to say it, but it's definitely a thing in the UK too... I've had white van drivers shout obscenities at me as they're passing by before I lost the weight... So I'm sure it happens more often than you think

 

[Autistamatic]

I hate to say it, but it's definitely a thing in the UK too... I've had white van drivers shout obscenities at me as they're passing by before I lost the weight... So I'm sure it happens more often than you think

Wow! I can honestly say I've never seen or heard anything like that myself. I've heard the odd unkind comment behind people's backs by gossipy types but never anything as overt as you describe. Very disappointing to hear

 

[Bronzelincolns]

no one should be bullied, but most of the vitriol I see against fat people is pushback against the fat acceptance movement.

 

[Ylva]

Obesity is not a crime nor something people do to antagonize others. There's noting to condone. Literally no one gets obese on purpose.

 

[Elemental]

I stopped seeing one of my closest, longest standing friends because of their compulsive eating habits & the health problems it was generating for them. I understand it's a hard habit to kick, like any compulsive behaviour is & that it's often a symptom or co-mordant condition. I get that but found it was too distressing to witness so don't see them anymore.