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NTWife

Well-Known Member
I am currently in the process of divorcing my Aspie husband. In addition to the Asperger's, he apparently hid from me for the duration of our 22 year relationship that he was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder (some time during the first year) and about the same time he was diagnosed with AS, he was also diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

I'm stretching my memory here but... I believe he was diagnosed with AS and NPD just under a year ago. In the initial stages of the AS, he accepted the diagnosis and told both me and the marriage counselor it seemed to just make sense and answered SO many questions he had about himself. However, he refused to seek help for this after spending time on an Aspie forum where he was told he was "fine" and that I was the one who needed to get help to learn how to "deal" with him.

My marriage to him was fraught with abuse of all kinds and affairs on his part, always met with (afterward, and almost immediately) WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GET OVER IT????

I'm currently living in the Western US, but will be moving back to my hometown once I can get to settlement in the divorce (he and his attorney are dragging it out as much as they possibly can, not because he doesn't want the divorce, but because "I" left "him".

I'll post more in a more appropriate forum, probably one centered around divorce.
 
Welcome NTWife, if your not new here your new to me:)

I think it would good for us and you. we can then have a balanced point of view on the marriage break up a lot of the time people only hear it from one side
 
Hello!

I'm no doctor, but unfortunately, it does sound as if your soon-to-be ex-husband definitely has NPD. Treatment is possible, but marital/relationship therapy is more successful when both partners participate. Clearly his refusal to seek help, spurred by comments from well-meaning but ill-informed forumgoers, did neither of you any favors. But you may take comfort in that once the divorce is finalized, you'll be able to move on from this painful chapter in your life. I hope your almost-ex gets the help he needs, too, even if it seems unlikely at this point.

Best wishes.
 
Sounds like a very difficult situation. Unfortunately, marriage only works if both people are willing to work at it, and it sounds like he is not at that place right now. My divorce was just final a few months ago after 20 years together, so I know how tough it is to go through that. It's good to hear that you will be able to move back to your hometown - hopefully you will find a good support network there if you don't already have one. Good luck!
 
NTWife said:
I am currently in the process of divorcing my Aspie husband. In addition to the Asperger's, he apparently hid from me for the duration of our 22 year relationship that he was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder (some time during the first year) and about the same time he was diagnosed with AS, he was also diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

I'm stretching my memory here but... I believe he was diagnosed with AS and NPD just under a year ago. In the initial stages of the AS, he accepted the diagnosis and told both me and the marriage counselor it seemed to just make sense and answered SO many questions he had about himself. However, he refused to seek help for this after spending time on an Aspie forum where he was told he was "fine" and that I was the one who needed to get help to learn how to "deal" with him.

My marriage to him was fraught with abuse of all kinds and affairs on his part, always met with (afterward, and almost immediately) WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GET OVER IT????

I'm currently living in the Western US, but will be moving back to my hometown once I can get to settlement in the divorce (he and his attorney are dragging it out as much as they possibly can, not because he doesn't want the divorce, but because "I" left "him".

I'll post more in a more appropriate forum, probably one centered around divorce.
Click to expand...

I'm sorry things are hard for you right now. I've got two members of my family with NPD too, and it can be rather crippling at times.

Although I don't know you or your husband, my experience with NPD has taught me one thing; run, and never look back! Your life will only get better once you do.

I hope things work out for he best. If you ever need someone to vent to, my door's always open.
 
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