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lets try this discussion again shall we?

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kchapman1988

kchapman1988

Well-Known Member
having noted the poor direction my last thread went i feel i should start again as i would honestly like to try and debunk some of the ideas fueling the hatred and abuse certain marginalized groups receive in our society.

"seeing the hate that certain situations outside the 'mainstream' get i have to ask myself 'why are these people hated?' the thing is reproduction is not a straightforward thing sure 'tab A goes into slot B' is the basic idea but after going through all that you have just rolled the die, boy or girl isn't even a sure thing! evolution is still going on, how can that happen? children are born different than their parents! as i understand it : be it gay, lesbian, transgender, disabilities in some cases, they are all born that way. so what's to hate? is it worry that all gay/lesbian people lust after you? get your damn ego in check! if they wanted you they would come onto you like any other person to someone they want and you have the right to politely turn them down and make your orientation clear.

is it because 'they are different'? everyone is different! even twins are different. get to know them they are just people and are unlikely to bite (unless they are having a bad day like ANYONE ELSE!) is it flamboyance? that isn't just a gay thing! girly girls are like that too so its not because of that. do you think transgender people are lying to you? trying to deceive? they were born in a unique situation and are simply trying to correct something that was mismatched at birth (mind and body) all we need to do is get to know the person not the orientation, they are a person just like you, they likely have an interesting story to tell.

however, one request if i may: if you want to change the status quo to simply become the one on top kindly don't speak, you are no better than the group there now you are just angry its not you, treating everyone with respect you want to be treated with as a human being is a better plan, everyone may be different, with different skills and things we are predisposed to be good at but we are still all human and deserve the live the life we were born to the best we can, we all have internal problems we don't need added to" this thread will hopefully leave inflammatory things at the door as this is a discussion and problem that truly needs to be had and to be taken in, re-educate the parents and they will change what they teach their children.
 
kchapman1988 said:
having noted the poor direction my last thread went i feel i should start again as i would honestly like to try and debunk some of the ideas fueling the hatred and abuse certain marginalized groups receive in our society.

"seeing the hate that certain situations outside the 'mainstream' get i have to ask myself 'why are these people hated?'...what's to hate?...

get your damn ego in check! if they wanted you they would come onto you like any other person to someone they want and you have the right to politely turn them down and make your orientation clear.

...is it flamboyance? that isn't just a gay thing! girly girls are like that too so its not because of that. do you think transgender people are lying to you? trying to deceive? they were born in a unique situation and are simply trying to correct something that was mismatched at birth (mind and body) all we need to do is get to know the person not the orientation, they are a person just like you, they likely have an interesting story to tell.

however, one request if i may: if you want to change the status quo to simply become the one on top kindly don't speak, you are no better than the group there now you are just angry its not you, treating everyone with respect you want to be treated with as a human being is a better plan, everyone may be different, with different skills and things we are predisposed to be good at but we are still all human and deserve the live the life we were born to the best we can, we all have internal problems we don't need added to" this thread will hopefully leave inflammatory things at the door as this is a discussion and problem that truly needs to be had and to be taken in, re-educate the parents and they will change what they teach their children.
Click to expand...

The Ranting Room is this way.
 
There might be hope for this thread continuing if the focus were clearly defined.

To "debunk some of the ideas fueling the hatred" it seems to me that the point would be
to examine the stories people tell themselves which prompt the hating. The exact details
of the instigating factors aren't as important as the intervening story.

Example = Event or Condition A.
One person's response to A..."That's a terrible threat to me. I should kill it."
Another person's response to A "That's boring. I will leave it alone."
Yet another response.."I have never heard of that. That surprises me. I will find out more about it."
 
tree said:
There might be hope for this thread continuing if the focus were clearly defined.

To "debunk some of the ideas fueling the hatred" it seems to me that the point would be
to examine the stories people tell themselves which prompt the hating. The exact details
of the instigating factors aren't as important as the intervening story.

Example = Event or Condition A.
One person's response to A..."That's a terrible threat to me. I should kill it."
Another person's response to A "That's boring. I will leave it alone."
Yet another response.."I have never heard of that. That surprises me. I will find out more about it."
Click to expand...
focus is an issue for me :( but you're right, i would ask people to think about those they hate and think "why?" normally that hatred is based on a misconception or simply lack or knowledge.
 
Just for my information; considering the previous thread, on which this is a continuation, has been locked, I take it, it has been taken up with any staff member (perhaps the one who closed it in particular) to see if it's ok to restart this debate and steer it in a proper direction?
 
King_Oni said:
Just for my information; considering the previous thread, on which this is a continuation, has been locked, I take it, it has been taken up with any staff member (perhaps the one who closed it in particular) to see if it's ok to restart this debate and steer it in a proper direction?
Click to expand...
yes, it was locked by wyvern and gave permission to be restarted because the topic was helpful but the direction it had headed was against the rules and likely would lead to an argument. this was meant to be a discussion and talk things through rather than a rant
 
kchapman1988 said:
yes, it was locked by wyvern and gave permission to be restarted because the topic was helpful but the direction it had headed was against the rules and likely would lead to an argument. this was meant to be a discussion and talk things through rather than a rant
Click to expand...

Ok :) thanks for clearing it up.

about.png
 
Hey----I thought this was a discussion of why people react with hatred.
Not a list of stuff/things/people/activities...
 
kchapman1988 said:
tea to relax, coffee to cope :p i also don't enjoy bitter things. care to weigh in on this discussion king_oni? any groups you dislike that don't actually hurt people i mean
Click to expand...

I'll think about it and perhaps get back to this thread later... I had a few thoughts to share about the initial thread, but as it turned out it got locked.

So yeah, I might return to offer my 2 cents here later today.
 
in a certain circumstance i could understand anger at transgender people if they were not upfront when dating/picking someone up at a bar or what have you, getting to the making out stage and finding something that shouldn't be there (or should be there but isn't) as they expected one thing from the visual indication but found something else underneath, not exactly ronseal in that case (exactly what it says on the tin) but outside of that? no. they are mostly just people trying to get on with their lives like you are, they just have more problems to deal with
 
kchapman1988 :) - Are you saying that it doesn't make sense to you that people should be so hateful towards certain groups and that you want to understand/figure out what motivates people to hate?

(I'm asking this as a means of clarifying what the main focus of the thread is.)

(BTW, love your use or the Ronseal slogan as an analogy)
 
It is likely that the story in a hating person's head involves one or more of these irrational ideas (Albert Ellis):
  • It is a dire necessity for adult humans to be loved or approved by virtually every significant other person in their community.
  • One absolutely must be competent, adequate and achieving in all important respects or else one is an inadequate, worthless person.
  • People absolutely must act considerately and fairly and they are damnable villains if they do not. They are their bad acts.
  • It is awful and terrible when things are not the way one would very much like them to be.
  • Emotional disturbance is mainly externally caused and people have little or no ability to increase or decrease their dysfunctional feelings and behaviors.
  • If something is or may be dangerous or fearsome, then one should be constantly and excessively concerned about it and should keep dwelling on the possibility of it occurring.
  • One cannot and must not face life's responsibilities and difficulties and it is easier to avoid them.
  • One must be quite dependent on others and need them and you cannot mainly run one's own life.
  • One's past history is an all-important determiner of one's present behavior and because something once strongly affected one's life, it should indefinitely have a similar effect.
  • Other people's disturbances are horrible and one must feel upset about them.
  • There is invariably a right, precise and perfect solution to human problems and it is awful if this perfect solution is not found.
 
Vinca said:
kchapman1988

(BTW, love your use or the Ronseal slogan as an analogy)
Click to expand...

"Ronseal is a British wood stain, paint and preservative manufacturer,
known for the "Does exactly what it says on the tin" phrase." wikipedia

I was completely at a loss to know what that was.
I looked it up.
 
Vinca said:
kchapman1988 :) - Are you saying that it doesn't make sense to you that people should be so hateful towards certain groups and that you want to understand/figure out what motivates people to hate?

(I'm asking this as a means of clarifying what the main focus of the thread is.)

(BTW, love your use or the Ronseal slogan as an analogy)
Click to expand...
im trying to figure out why these groups are marginalized and hated for likely the way they were born, its not like these people see all the hatred and hardship others of that group have suffered and think " wow i want that in my life!" as people with AS we are also born different to the mainstream so atleast for us we should be able to see these groups as simply people with their own inborn problems they need to live with
 
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