Living w/ autism

[Maray]

Hoi!
I'm sixteen years old. I was diagnosed a few months ago. I am somewhat concerned that all my struggles are getting worse. I used to be fine with leaving the house and speaking to people when I was younger. These days I don't go out without my mother; I always need someone to hold onto, and even then I'll start feeling ill after a few hours. I'm afraid it's only going to get worse, and I don't know what to do about it. I feel trapped and miserable. I struggle to go to school and keep up with work, despite, in theory, enjoying the lessons. I'm caught in a cycle of school, exhaustion and procrastination. I feel guilty for kicking up such a fuss about everything (particularly school attendence), since I don't know if I am justified in acting as I do. I don't know if I can/should 'pull myself together', and if I can, how to go about doing it.
Any advice?

 

[Graphin]

I'm getting into a similar situation, no idea what to do since everybody denies responsibility and help

 

[Bolletje]

I have developed a panic disorder about going outside, which also causes me to feel sick and anxious when I leave the house, especially when I know I’ll be out for a while. I will freak out when I know It makes everyday life - work, hobbies, grocery shopping - rather challenging. I’ll soon be starting with a combination of cognitive behavioral therapy and exposure therapy to hopefully help me regain my composure and make life easier again.

 

[Major Tom]

I'd try and learn some coping strategies as soon as you can, the older you get, the more challenging things become. As far as what strategies, I don't know unfortunately . I have similar issues, but because I have a family I need to raise, I just do what I have to, no matter how difficult things are. Hopefully it doesn't break me someday.

 

[Sarah S]

What you need to do is besides Major Toms excellent statement is to inform your mother about this so that she can then seek professional help = psychologist, preferably one that is accustomed to ASD diagnosis dear, and also talk to the school so they can perhaps help you as well. Trying to solve this by your self is NOT the right way here (NOT meant as don't try to find a way to deal with this your self ) but more you ALSO need professional help. as well as help in school

Oh and you have NOTHING to feel guilty for asking or needing extra support either at home or in School dear its YOUR RIGHT .

 

[Tom]

No real advice on 'how' to do it, at the moment. But do know its very common among us. All I can say is don't give up trying to integrate with people and society as it is very rewarding and important thru out life. I did notice phases for me personally. Its easier at times, harder at others. The first time it happened seriously I was about the same age as you and that was maybe the most difficult. But after having it happen, somehow getting thru it and have it happen again years later made the second and later ones not as frightening.

 

[Nervous Rex]

Agree with the comments above - a counselor should be able to help you learn some coping skills. Here are some that work for me - your results may vary:

1) Break problems down into smaller parts, and work on one part at a time. For intimidating projects, finding one small part that I can do helps me to get started and avoid procrastination.

2) Plan for and look forward to breaks. E.g., if you know you have to go to the store, plan for time to rest and recover afterward. Looking forward to that time can help you get through the difficult things.

3) Do nice things for future you: For exhaustion, I have to tell myself every night that if I get to bed early, I will have a better day tomorrow. For procrastination, I have to remember that the sooner I get something done, the less time I will spend worrying about it.

 

[Shamar]

Hoi!
I'm sixteen years old. I was diagnosed a few months ago. I am somewhat concerned that all my struggles are getting worse. I used to be fine with leaving the house and speaking to people when I was younger. These days I don't go out without my mother; I always need someone to hold onto, and even then I'll start feeling ill after a few hours. I'm afraid it's only going to get worse, and I don't know what to do about it. I feel trapped and miserable. I struggle to go to school and keep up with work, despite, in theory, enjoying the lessons. I'm caught in a cycle of school, exhaustion and procrastination. I feel guilty for kicking up such a fuss about everything (particularly school attendence), since I don't know if I am justified in acting as I do. I don't know if I can/should 'pull myself together', and if I can, how to go about doing it.
Any advice?

So far, good advice here for you. My two cents worth: I (and many others here) have learned that simply being diagnosed is a tremendous help in understanding our life and struggles. Knowing what is going on in your mind helps you to deal with yourself. Many of us were diagnosed late in life, and the diagnosis came as a form of enlightenment.

Learn about autism in general, and how it affects YOU in particular. Every one of us is different, hence the term "neurodiverse." You will probably find autism gives you certain strengths and talents. Learn these and develop them. As Temple Grandin said, "The world needs all kinds of different minds."

 

[paloftoon]

Are you in the US in a state where cyber schools are okay to operate in?
If your parents are okay with this, you could have them help you transfer over.

There are a few private cyber schools that exist which I'm sure are expensive, but if this is an option for you, it might improve your concerns and improve your ability to learn.

With school being one less worry, you'll be able to focus on yourself outside of school more and work on improving your skills socially at your speed more.