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Might get a "Write-Up" for sexual harassment

2010Dolby

2010Dolby

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
I want to get some other opinions on this. I work with a girl named Chelsea. We both go to the same college and we flirt a lot. She works in the office, I spend most of my time in the warehouse doing construction and assembly work.

So the other day she drove up to the warehouse to give me a pick-up ticket for a client. I didn't see her at first, and I was shirtless and cutting sheet-board. (Keep in mind, she gets angry easy. And I tease her a lot)

Chelsea: "You're kinda hot when you're shirtless using the hacksaw."
Me: "You're kinda pretty when I'm drunk."

She felt insulted and complained that I sexually harassed her. I have two problems with this: 1. She CLEARLY said something sexual to me first. 2. Shes just trying to get me in trouble for my awesomly hilarious remark.

Agree or disagree?
 
2010Dolby said:
I want to get some other opinions on this. I work with a girl named Chelsea. We both go to the same college and we flirt a lot. She works in the office, I spend most of my time in the warehouse doing construction and assembly work.

So the other day she drove up to the warehouse to give me a pick-up ticket for a client. I didn't see her at first, and I was shirtless and cutting sheet-board. (Keep in mind, she gets angry easy. And I tease her a lot)

Chelsea: "You're kinda hot when you're shirtless using the hacksaw."
Me: "You're kinda pretty when I'm drunk."

She felt insulted and complained that I sexually harassed her. I have two problems with this: 1. She CLEARLY said something sexual to me first. 2. Shes just trying to get me in trouble for my awesomly hilarious remark.

Agree or disagree?
Click to expand...

To be fair, it appears that you both made innappropriate comments.

I realize that it may have been meant all in fun but, obviously, this person you said this to did not truly think so.

I am not a politically-correct person but I have seen that on jobs, etc, one must be very careful nowadays.

If anyone is to be written up, it is only without bias that you should both be, not just you alone.
 
WOW. That is freakin hilarious, if it did happen like that, as most people would have a hard time being that quick with a comeback.

She may be able to claim that she was suggesting you possibly would overheat whilst using a piece of equipment in a partially clothed state
However, there is nothing to say on your side as it is a fairly harmless statement: your level of attractiveness is only moderate and it becomes apparent when I am inebriated!

Seriously, I can be no help at all as I live in another country and don’t know how hair trigger you laws are, it may all blow over or you could get fired and end up a shirtless beggar LOL

Personally, I reckon it will be fine as it looks like she could just be upping the game on your flirting
 
NeverEnder: Yea, those finicky laws can be tricky to work around. Theres a fine line between funny and what someone gets offended by. But everyone at work knows she was offended, she just got mad about the joke. Nothing sexually, just like she thought I was mean. I hope that makes sense.

Gomendosi: Hahaha! It's a line from a song and it seemed like she set me up perfect for the joke. How could I not use that?! :) Personally, I think shes simply being a baby about it and is trying to get me to apologize for a well-timed friendly insult
 
2010Dolby said:
NeverEnder: Yea, those finicky laws can be tricky to work around. Theres a fine line between funny and what someone gets offended by. But everyone at work knows she was offended, she just got mad about the joke. Nothing sexually, just like she thought I was mean. I hope that makes sense.

Gomendosi: Hahaha! It's a line from a song and it seemed like she set me up perfect for the joke. How could I not use that?! :) Personally, I think shes simply being a baby about it and is trying to get me to apologize for a well-timed friendly insult
Click to expand...

2010Dolby:

I get what you're saying. I'm sure it was all meant in a harmless manner.

Did she overreact? In some ways, definitely, considering what she said to you first.

It will all probably blow over. People say/do far worse.
 
After that she got mad and said, "Oh whatever! We all know you check me out when Im turned around!" and then went to her truck, did a solid (and damn impressive) 7 or 8 second burnout, and hauled *** back down to the office
 
Yeah that clinches it, she was definitely mucking around, didn’t get the response she wanted and so, got ******! Don’t worry about it 2010Dolby, I reckon nothing will happen cause of it.
 
I just stopped by the office to get my paycheck. Chelsea and my boss where there and laughed as soon as I walked in. Apparently it was just a big joke and I was never in any threat of trouble. Not sure if I'm relieved that all my friends and co-workers now I'm somewhat of a gentleman... or annoyed that my boss is 50 year old child...
 
That's ridiculous.

I think she's just offended about you implying that she's not very attractive.

Her telling you that you "You're kinda hot when you're shirtless using the hacksaw" is much more "sexual" than you saying "You're kinda pretty when I'm drunk." Since when is calling someone "pretty" a sexual thing?

I'll admit that you telling her that she's pretty only when you're drunk wasn't a very smart thing to say and I can see how someone could get offended by that, but it's far from being "sexual".
 
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Chances are she is just bluffing because she knows if she did go as far to file a grievance, you would have the upper hand with what she said to you. Even so, I don't think she would have a leg to stand on with her complaint. It takes a LOT more than just a flirty remark. Since neither one of you said anything explicitly, unmistakably sexual, I think that HR would simply say hey, just watch it. Real sexual harassment, the kind where the courts get involved, is a lot more serious than that. They aren't going to waste time on an exchange like yours.

I would, however, watch how I interacted with her from now on, as she sounds like a troublemaker in other ways. However, I wouldn't be surprised to hear you say that she ended up getting fired because if she is playing that game with you she's doing it to others. She needs to watch it because employers do take notice of such things.
 
But I do agree that it was rather unprofessional of your boss to be joking around with her in that manner. I'm not sure whether you might mention something to someone in HR if there is anyone that you can trust. Sometimes the "front office" hasn't a clue as to what is going on in back and would not tolerate it if they knew. I wouldn't make a big deal of it, I'd just say something casual like oh bye the way, are you aware that this incident happened and this is how it was handled? This might put them on notice where they start watching things a little more closely.
 
Spinning Compass said:
But I do agree that it was rather unprofessional of your boss to be joking around with her in that manner. I'm not sure whether you might mention something to someone in HR if there is anyone that you can trust. Sometimes the "front office" hasn't a clue as to what is going on in back and would not tolerate it if they knew. I wouldn't make a big deal of it, I'd just say something casual like oh bye the way, are you aware that this incident happened and this is how it was handled? This might put them on notice where they start watching things a little more closely.
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I have two jobs; one is at a warehouse for a furniture restoration and manufacturing company. I basically just build chairs. The other is a very unprofessional construction company, this incident happened at the construction company. We don't have an HR person. If us guys get into an argument it either gets resolved by a drinking contest or a fist fight. Thats part of why I was freaking out, because I've never truely had a confrontation with a girl before. I had no idea what to do. Since I didnt know how to resolve a confrontation with a girl, I tried to ignore it haha I just got a lil confused
 
Yeah, I guess I'm spoiled because I work in a professional environment, but I know what you mean, because I hear the same sort of thing from people I know who work in factories. Apparently there's a looser standard of conduct there. I probably wouldn't fit in well.

But as I said, I really would not worry about it. Because there is no way of dealing with that sort of thing "in-house", if she really wanted to lay a sexual harassment charge on you she would have to go to a lawyer and that takes money even assuming she can find a lawyer who will listen. Of course the more money she's willing to spend the more they are willing to listen, but in the end if she doesn't have an airtight case, no amount of money is going to interest them. Getting a lawyer isn't always as easy as people make it sound. I'd just try to stay out of "politics" and do your job. She's just trying to throw her weight around and scare you.
 
That was a brilliant comeback!

As the others have said, there's nothing to worry about and you have the upper hand anyway since she made a "sexual" remark to you first.
 
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