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my experiences

H

hazel

Well-Known Member
hiya everyone, i relatively new here so i thought i'd share my experiences to see if they are common with people with aspergers.

all through my child hood ive never liked playing 'pretend' with other children and to be honest i have always found it easier to get on with people alot older than me rather than people my own age. although i suppose when i am older i will probably relate to people alot younger than me...

i have felt monumentaly different from people my own age. i mean im not talking about clothes or music differences , i'm on about thinking differently and like i was almost a different species. my interests when i was younger werent particually odd.. i loved dinosaurs and space and fossils so not too bad. it was when i turned 11 or 12 that me and other people grew apart on so many levels.. i didnt seem to change..and i still haven't . every day since then has been a struggle. at last though i feel i am embracing my differences and trying to like my self as i am as i have tried very hard to be normal ~
(whatever that is ) but i dont actually like being normal lol .:lol2:
i actually like to be by my self for the majority of the time and i no this is weird but i feel like i can relate to animals more than humans at times.:wtf:
i find this world clashes immensly with 'my' world.
its too loud too bright too harsh.. i hate loud noises and bright lights but this doesnt seem to bother other ppeople.
i want to start listing my 'differences' just to see if anyone else has them..
i hate being hugged by people i dont know
i really struggle to make eye contact
i dont see the point of gossip/ social chit chat
i'd much rather talk about a subject at school like science or maths rather to friends than fashion or boys:-O
i also have little trouble with reading social situations however i do often mistake peoples compliments for sarcasm( which is very unusual for ppl with AS)
i find it extremely hard to show emotion - i have a very 'stiff' posture
i find it very hard to know what to do when people show strong emotions such as happiness or sadness


those are SOME of my quirks so please reply if you any similar problems :)

Hazel
 
Hi, Hazel, yes, I can relate to what you said. I have problems with all of those things, too.

I have gotten somewhat better reading social situations (I am in my 50's). One thing that has helped is that I joined an organization called International Association of Administrative Professionals (IAAP). They have all kinds of seminars and training and speakers with a lot of emphasis on what is called the "soft skills" or "people skills". So it isn't just Aspies that have these problems too!

As far as the eye contact thing--this came up in one of the seminars I attended because there are cultures that are not big on eye contact either. The speaker said that as long as you are focused on the person's face, direct eye contact is not that big of a deal. So I hope this helps.
 
I share many of the same quirks that you have. In particular, I would say that the comment about relating more to animals than people is very similar to how I feel. I have two cats and I much prefer spending time with them than many people. My eye contact used to be worse but I think I am better at maintaining eye contact than I used to be, although I'm never really comfortable with it and I think it probably comes across as being too forced when I do it.

I also think the section where you refer to emotions is very close to me. In general, I show very little emotion, whether it be anger, happiness, sadness, etc. I actually got kind of mad the other day and it was really shocking to me because it is rare lol. Also, I hate being around people who are very emotional, because as you are I don't know how to react very well to that. I usually just stand there and wonder what I should do next.
 
hiya thanks for your reply, i am alot better at maintaining eye contact than i used to be but its good to know that aslong as i look at the person it doesnt matter too much
 
hello :) i'm glad you can relate to how i feel and vice versa i also have a cat and when i'm distressed for what ever reason he seems to calm me down lol
 
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