My Problem With Relationships

[KevinMao133]

No one can be 100% logical, same with me. That said, I try my best to do so by rationalizing things I do

Anyways, here’s my problem with relationships: I can prepare for it and it also doesn’t come naturally

I can respect all the women I meet but still, no relationship will ever come out

Unlike being a writer, there’s a blueprint to follow, I carve my own path by preparing diligently. I also know what to expect. I do these things and results present itself

Anyways, I don’t know how to prepare for relationships. I also don’t know how to improve my social skills. If a woman comes up to me and pursues me, I won’t know what to do

 

[Neonatal RRT]

Now-a-days, I would not try to create a script or a narrative with anyone. There may be physical attraction that will create that initial meeting, but from there, it is highly individualized and cultural, and when I say that it could even mean from the city, the suburbs, or rural. It could mean modern feminism vs. "old school" feminism. It could mean college educated urban liberal vs. working class, conservative rural. Throw in ethnic or religious background. Holy Moses! Your best bet is to be open and honest, as well as, intellectually curious about the other person. If the other person senses that you are interested in them as a person, it's more likely a bond will form, and they will open up and converse for hours with you. Keep in mind, truth and facts are highly tied to context and perspective, so chances are, they will say or believe something that you won't and vice-versa. This is NOT the time for arguments, but rather an opportunity for probing deeper into the reasons why they believe that way, and then accept it for what it is. Learn something. Differences are expected, but not a deal breaker. I think you just have to be good at listening to their life experience and put things into perspective, as does the other person. Are you a good listener? Are they a good listener?

I tend be more of a political independent, whereas my wife is more liberal. I did not grow up around the church, and my wife did. She was raised in a totally different household than I, so we had some differences in opinion when it came to child rearing. My interests are not hers, and vice-versa. Here's the deal though, we complement each other in many ways. As a couple, we actually use our differences to our advantage as a team. So, this idea that you NEED to find someone with similar interests and background in order for a relationship to work is false. What you need is a mindset of acceptance and intellectual curiosity about each other.

 

[Suzette]

What you need is a mindset of acceptance and intellectual curiosity about each other.

That is indeed the secret. And honesty. About all things.