My sister called me mentally ill

[Bosko]

Now this may seem like she was being malicious. But I’m not quite sure of it. She told me she was “constantly going through phases.” I responded by saying so do I.” She than told me that it because of mental illness. I don’t know how to feel about it because it either may be she doesn’t quite understand or she was being rude or maybe she’s right. I just want to know

 

[Forest Cat]

I think siblings just argue and say things and stuff sometimes. My sister hit me in the head with a shovel once. Siblings are siblings. I don't think you should worry too much about it. Don't let it get to you.

 

[Tom]

I think siblings just argue and say things and stuff sometimes. My sister hit me in the head with a shovel once. Siblings are siblings. I don't think you should worry too much about it. Don't let it get to you.

I almost hit my sister with an arrow once.

Good times...

 

[Crossbreed]

Autism is not a mental illness.*
Some co-morbids can be.
I don't know enough about you to know if the latter is true for you.

*It is a difference.

 

[Crossbreed]

I almost hit my sister with an arrow once.

It sounds like you miss her...

 

[Tom]

It sounds like you miss her...

I do indeed. But she is still fottunately with us. But I will tell the story.

It was back when I was 15 and she 12. At the time we were involved in a long drawn out and bitter sibling war. Made all the more humiliating as she was much wittier and often drew blood in our endless verbal sparring.

One day I was in the back yard target shooting and she came to a 2nd story window in the house and started to taunt me. I intended to scare her and shot aiming above her hopefully to hit the upper sil or roof. But I also shot weakly and instead it went right thru the screen window a few inches above where her head had been. She had moved away but I did not know where and so dreaded it might have hit her for a few seconds. But no and she popped back up to taunt me some more.

Postscript. Not many years later our relationship healed and I came to think her probably the coolest person on earth to hang out with. She was hysterically funny and a natural mimic. She went on to become a successful beauty editor for Madimoselle and Glamour Mags in New York City. No thanks to my efforts.

 

[Nick12]

i wish you a happy day filled with sunshine and rainbows

 

[Bosko]

I

Autism is not a mental illness.*
Some co-morbids can be.
I don't know enough about you to know if the latter is true for you.

*It is a difference.

believe she was talking about my ADHD so she’s probably right. And frankly mental health and mental illness are taught properly or not at all in school

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Family says stuff you don't like. It's a constant. But you only have one family. So forgive and pretend like you didn't hear it.

 

[Slim Jim]

My grandmother told me this when I was a teenager. She would also slap me for "cheekin her."

Oh ...on the mental illness part, this was my reaction:

Autism = mental illness in most peoples mind. Also "we're all a bit autistic" was another one of her favourite lines too.

 

[Aspychata]

Defintely was called many names by my brother. Lol. And he made it clear l was a defect. So l left and found my life on my terms. And discovered l wasn't a defect. My mom still tries to weave this storyline, she refuses to accept l am autistic, and refuses to accept who l am. Because then she must accept her poor parenting. It's a twisted complicated relationship that l never exposed my daughter to.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

My sister put a pichfork prong through my brothers nostril once, I had to step in and stop the fight. we all grow up and some how survive.

 

[Homulilly]

I don’t think she was trying to be malicious.

She said she goes through phases, you said it happens to you too. So when she said it’s because of mental illness, she probably thought it (partially) pertains to her too.

Also mental illness isn’t exactly a bad word, though many people attach negative connotations to it. “Mental illness” is also a layperson’s term, I think, so the definition isn’t exactly clear. Some use it only for mood disorders (like depression) and some use it for everything in the DSM.

 

[Slime_Punk]

Also "we're all a bit autistic" was another one of her favourite lines too.

This one stings. Or anytime someone tries to minimize your experiences and issues

 

[Neonatal RRT]

We had a lengthy discussion on this topic of the language "illness" on another thread here. Reading the language used by the N.I.H. and W.H.O., one is either in a state of mental "health" or "illness",...it's literally that simplified. Now, the rest of the language like "disorder", "dysfunction", "disease", and "condition" appears to be a matter of semantics, political correctness, and social stigma. You can do a Google search on this topic "mental health vs mental illness",...and the other words mentioned, as well. Although there is this line of thought that, clearly there must be a differentiating factor between these words. Clearly, a person with an ASD is not mentally ill,...right? Something like schizophrenia is "illness",...but not autism. I was born this way,...so I am not "ill",...it's "neurodivergence". I know we would love to think that way,...that people who are mean, nasty and without empathy throw the "mentally ill" at us like a pie in the face,...but technically,...as much as I wear and accept my "autism spectrum condition" label,...by definition, the reason I have that label is that I am not in a state of "mental health" per se.

The terminology that we use in the non-medical, layman's world,...there is a tendency to make separations or come up with some sort of severity scale,..."illness" being the worst,..."condition" being the least. However, like I said, professionally, I can't see a line where psychologists are making these distinctions. You are in a state of "mental health",...or a state of "mental illness". The language "mental illness" appears to be a huge "catch all",...with a long, long list of "conditions" that are included in it.

It's interesting how some words really get under our skin and bother us.

 

[Atrapa Almas]

I also had strong arguments and some figths with my little sister. I may have called her retarded like hundreds times... And I meant exactly that. To me she was mentally retarded. She was so bad at maths, chemistry, physics, could not concentrate to learn, would memorize answers instead of understand things... She probably just have some Adhd traits and I was not a good brother for her. She wanted to call my attention and play with me and I wanted her to go away, let me alone or just vanish from my life.

Now I know the difference between illness, condition and disorder, but it is a blurry difference that may be understood different by different people. I feel my autistic traits as a condition that makes me different but not inferior. I am better in some ways and worse in other ways to most "normal" people. And I am happy with myself, so its a condition for me.

If I was depressed and more focused on what I do worse than others, I migth think that I have a disorder.

And if I was believing or wanting to be "cured" I may think that I have an illness.

What "should" other autists think about their situations, how should they call it? I have no idea.

By saying that you are ill, your sister migth be revealing a secret wish of seeing you "cured" or better or happier. I would ask her.

None of my three sisters pay much attention to my feelings about ( what I percieve as) my condittion, I would find lovely if any of them or my parents were worried about my "illness". I could explain them the differences between illness, disorders and conditions. But none of them care about that.

On the other hand, last weekend I hurt my knee and they all were worried about that.

So what can I say?

 

[Sarah S]

I believe she was talking about my ADHD so she’s probably right. And frankly mental health and mental illness are taught properly or not at all in school

There is NO known Co morbids to either ADHD or ASD as far as i know that is listed as mental illness. Feel free to let her know i said that so that's just plain ....... So please just drop those thoughts that you are mentally ill Bosko. IF you, where they would already have diagnosed you earlier when they diagnosed, you're ADHD Etc...

 

[Crossbreed]

There is NO known Co morbids to either ADHD or ASD as far as i know that is listed as mental illness.

I respectfully beg to differ. My ASD2 son has OCD. Bipolar Disorder, clinical depression & clinical anxiety are all very common co-morbids, too.

 

[Judge]

I respectfully beg to differ. My ASD2 son has OCD. Bipolar Disorder, clinical depression & clinical anxiety are all very common co-morbids, too.

I was formally diagnosed with chronic clinical depression, social anxiety and OCD. From my own perspective I've always thought of them as far more problematic than considerations of autism itself. No matter how anyone categorizes them.

Autism often ends for me when I close my front door and cease socialization.

My comorbids? They follow me around 24/7.

 

[Sarah S]

I respectfully beg to differ. My ASD2 son has OCD. Bipolar Disorder, clinical depression & clinical anxiety are all very common co-morbids, too.

I stand corrected just checked what mental illness seem to imply these days and i was wrong. In my world Mental illness is like: Psychopath, Narcissist, schizophrenic etc... But it seems they have lumped all kinds of diagnosis under this label now (incl ASD /Bipolar / OCD / Anxiety, wouldn't surprise me if ADHD is on that list as well etc.... So, i guess i also am mentally ill then (this is so far up the creek i don't know what to say any more about this actually, i mean the lumping all this diagnosis under mentally ill not our discussion in here of course)

Thanks for the respectfully correction of my wrong statement Crossbreed (blushing face)