need advice for my 20 months old autistic daughter

[Qian]

I am new here, just confirmed the medical diagnosis of autism for my daughter today. I am still try to process everything at this point. Is there any parents have the same situation like me? Not sure how much ABA therapy and speech therapy that can help? and not sure how long does it takes to get those set up. I don't know how her future would be like even with those therapy, or any other organizations/help program I can get?.......Too overwhelm......

 

[Crossbreed]

Hello & welcome @Qian.

If you are in the USA,
https://autlanders.blogspot.com/2019/07/finding-support-resources-in-usa.htmlI am ASD1 and have children at all three severity levels.

 

[Rodafina]

Hello and welcome Qian.

I hope that we can be supportive to you. I would recommend that you take everything just one moment at a time right now. The diagnosis of autism at such a young age is just the beginning, and you don’t have to figure everything out right in this moment.

You will find that most of us here regard autism as a lifelong condition, and so there will be no cure. Rather, it will be about learning how your child’s mind works, and just like any other parent, figuring out how you can set them up for success in the world.

I hope you stick around and read the experiences that many of us have shared here on the forum. It could be particularly relevant for you to read about some of our experiences with ABA therapy and other childhood treatments that people have gone through. Most of us are adults with autism here, but you’ll be able to learn so much about what our experience in the world has been. This can prepare you for being a parent to your autistic child. There are a good amount of parents here, too, so I think you will be in good company, and I hope that you will learn a lot.

 

[Au Naturel]

I am new here, just confirmed the medical diagnosis of autism for my daughter today. I am still try to process everything at this point. Is there any parents have the same situation like me? Not sure how much ABA therapy and speech therapy that can help? and not sure how long does it takes to get those set up. I don't know how her future would be like even with those therapy, or any other organizations/help program I can get?.......Too overwhelm......

I'd strongly recommend speech therapy. Even an NT child at that age who isn't speaking a few clear words should be getting speech therapy. As to the rest, ABA isn't the same as it was a decade ago, but there are many who have sour experiences with it.

Give your child as much experience around other children as possible. At that age, there's still a bit of plasticity in the brain. I suppose what level of autism makes a difference in where you go from there. Love her unconditionally.

 

[Qian]

Hello & welcome @Qian.

If you are in the USA,
https://autlanders.blogspot.com/2019/07/finding-support-resources-in-usa.htmlI am ASD1 and have children at all three severity levels.

Yes, I am in CA, the USA. Thank you for the link. My income is not eligible for the state's medical assistance program, I think, but I cannot afford of all the therapy, they are so expensive, so I need to do lots of homework on it.

You are so brave and strong, I don't known how you handle of three? mine is severity level too. I am already going crazy. She is in bed now and screaming (happy screaming most of time, she is self talking and in her own world), usually takes a while for her to fall asleep. I can hear her voice and I can see her in the monitor right now I am typing. Every voice she makes that hurts me so much.

How old are your children, and how're they doing? I just changed my job to on call, can not see our future !

 

[Qian]

Hello and welcome Qian.

I hope that we can be supportive to you. I would recommend that you take everything just one moment at a time right now. The diagnosis of autism at such a young age is just the beginning, and you don’t have to figure everything out right in this moment.

You will find that most of us here regard autism as a lifelong condition, and so there will be no cure. Rather, it will be about learning how your child’s mind works, and just like any other parent, figuring out how you can set them up for success in the world.

I hope you stick around and read the experiences that many of us have shared here on the forum. It could be particularly relevant for you to read about some of our experiences with ABA therapy and other childhood treatments that people have gone through. Most of us are adults with autism here, but you’ll be able to learn so much about what our experience in the world has been. This can prepare you for being a parent to your autistic child. There are a good amount of parents here, too, so I think you will be in good company, and I hope that you will learn a lot.

Thank you so much for your support, and thank you for take time to reply my message. I do have a lots of things to learn and this just beginning. So many adults with autism here can share their experiences that is great. I hope my daughter one day can type or can communicate whatever the way she can use. What worry me the most is that she doesn't have the ability to learn. She doesn't follow simply directions. The doctor today said she knew how to match the different shapes while she was playing the toys, maybe there is hope. I asked the doctor from her previous experiments, how other kids doing when they grow up, she didn't give me a direct answer. I know I asked the stupid question because everyone is different, and everyone is unique.

 

[VictorR]

Welcome.

I'm going to make two general reading suggestions that may assist you in your journey:

https://philosophy.ucsc.edu/SinclairDontMournForUs.pdf
https://www.autismforums.com/resources/uniquely-human.198/

 

[Qian]

I'd strongly recommend speech therapy. Even an NT child at that age who isn't speaking a few clear words should be getting speech therapy. As to the rest, ABA isn't the same as it was a decade ago, but there are many who have sour experiences with it.

Give your child as much experience around other children as possible. At that age, there's still a bit of plasticity in the brain. I suppose what level of autism makes a difference in where you go from there. Love her unconditionally.

Thank you for your recommendation. I asked the doctor if I should send my daughter to daycare/preschool center, she said we need to do ABA with their team first, but I do want to send her to daycare just want her to be with other children to see how she doing. I registered her to a school about one month ago, will start in a couple month.
My daughter randomly speak few words, but not meaningful, even with mama mama.

 

[Qian]

Welcome.

I'm going to make two general reading suggestions that may assist you in your journey:

https://philosophy.ucsc.edu/SinclairDontMournForUs.pdf
https://www.autismforums.com/resources/uniquely-human.198/

Thank you, I already saved

 

[Crossbreed]

How old are your children, and how're they doing? I just changed my job to on call, can not see our future !

If an adult autistic requires a legal guardian, they are functionally ASD3.
If they do not require a legal guardian (because they can express choices), but SSI requires a representative payee on their behalf, they are functionally ASD2.
ASD1s require neither, but could benefit from social coaching.

An autistic heroine, Temple Grandin, started off as an ASD2, but improved to ASD1 with help from her mother. (She is now a college professor.) Unfortunately, she is an exceptional example.

My 28yo ASD3 daughter lives at home with us. I am her guardian.
My 35yo ASD2 son lives in a supervised apartment in a nearby big city.
My 32yo (suspected ASD1) daughter is married with two kids.
My 24yo ASD1 son just graduated from university and is engaged.

All of my other kids (22-39) are living on their own, too.

 

[Au Naturel]

I don't know where you live. California has an early intervention program for children with disabilities and delayed speech. Other states do too. It isn't means tested.

"The Early Intervention Program for Infants and Toddlers with Disabilities was enacted in 1986 under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA; 20; U.S.C., Section 1431 et seq.). This program is California’s response to federal legislation ensuring that early intervention services for infants and toddlers with disabilities and their families are provided in a coordinated, family-centered system of services that are available statewide."

https://www.dds.ca.gov/services/early-start/

 

[kenaij]

You are so brave and strong, I don't known how you handle of three? mine is severity level too. I am already going crazy. She is in bed now and screaming (happy screaming most of time, she is self talking and in her own world), usually takes a while for her to fall asleep. I can hear her voice and I can see her in the monitor right now I am typing. Every voice she makes that hurts me so much.

You say she is screaming happily. This might not be specific to an autistic child because it also works with NT children. But what is your ritual for going to bed? See is there is a lot of stress, excitement or things for her to process. The screaming and talking might come from an overload of input. Try and make the routine of going to bad as relaxed as possible. Don`t overload her with information by talking a lot. Only say the things you absolutely must. After dinner get her ready for bed. If she likes to cuddle you can do that. Just sit with her, no talking no other inputs. And bring her to bed. Without telling her let her know (her brain know) it is the end of the day and it is time to rest now.
It might not take everything away. But it might calm her down so she does not have to process so much. If this means that it takes longer to get her into bed. So be it. If she falls asleep faster because of it, it means you can relax quicker aswell.
Hope it helps.