Need help describing this issue.

[Zalzo Zen]

Hello! Need help with this as it has been a nuisance for a while.

Whenever I have thoughts of something I usually construct the sentences in my head for me to speak. But when I do it comes out sort of chopped up. Like I know the words are there but it gets lost in the process anyway and leaves me speaking at a level that sounds immature that frustrates me to no end.

TL;DR: Words get cut/replaced in the process and leaves a garbled mess that makes it hard to convey what I want to say.

(Apologies if this sounds confusing, struggled with grammar and sentence structure for the longest time. I can clarify later on to the best of my ability.)

 

[Neonatal RRT]

Welcome to the club.

My thoughts and my written word are at a higher level than my spoken word. It's a form of dyspraxia and also effects the prosody, a common occurrence in autism. It's a processing delay. The only way for me to minimize it is to consciously focus upon keeping my mind in a relaxed state and speaking slowly and steadily. This, in and of itself, creates a different sort of speech pattern but at least my mind isn't in an "excited state" where I am stumbling and stammering trying to find the right words to come out at the right time. My mind is often several words and thoughts ahead of my mouth. There's just enough of a processing delay that I have to consciously force my brain to slow down, or else.

It takes a lot of self-discipline, especially since I work in a busy ICU at the hospital and am often forced to think on my feet very quickly. I absolutely cannot allow other people's excitement cause a "mirror effect" in my brain. I have to be the quiet, calm, collected person at the bedside. I cannot react to other people's anxiety-ridden behaviors. Deep breathe, focus, purposeful movements, precision.

 

[Chailatte_]

Hello! Need help with this as it has been a nuisance for a while.

Whenever I have thoughts of something I usually construct the sentences in my head for me to speak. But when I do it comes out sort of chopped up. Like I know the words are there but it gets lost in the process anyway and leaves me speaking at a level that sounds immature that frustrates me to no end.

TL;DR: Words get cut/replaced in the process and leaves a garbled mess that makes it hard to convey what I want to say.

(Apologies if this sounds confusing, struggled with grammar and sentence structure for the longest time. I can clarify later on to the best of my ability.)

It happens a lot to me and my best friend, and it was really embarrassing for years until we discovered that we are on the spectrum and have ADHD. There are days when it still embarrasses me, but you know what I think when I feel embarrassed? I think that I'm not hurting anyone, I think I'm doing my best, and I'm facing challenges that the person I'm talking to can't even imagine. Do they think I'm stupid? Or clumsy? It's not my responsibility; my responsibility is to be a polite and respectful human being, and 'stumbling' while speaking or mixing up words doesn't make me bad or rude!

(By the way, my best friend and I joke about it and feel less embarrassed over time because we see it as a fun trait that sets us apart from other people.) I hope I brought you some comfort with my experience,
And remember :be kind to yourself.

 

[Catwoman]

(Apologies if this sounds confusing, struggled with grammar and sentence structure for the longest time. I can clarify later on to the best of my ability.)

I struggle with this because of dyslexia. Difficulty getting thoughts down is also an issue.

 

[Tom]

Odd enough, the autist can be the calmest person in the room. I think maybe because some of us are not caught up in the emotion or group response in the moment but prefer to evaluate the situation for ourselves. This does not directly relate to your situation, except perhaps to try and slow down and maybe shorten the response to first and foremost communicate clearly. Perhaps this includes not paying attention to non essentials around you.

 

[Nervous Rex]

Happens to me a lot. I have to stop and say, "Let me take a second and get my words together."

 

[Hypnalis]

@Zalzo Zen

This can be trained.

Results are more or less guaranteed, but it's like training to build muscle.
It takes time and effort, and you'll have to practice on people. Which will be like training anything else as a beginner together with experts - a PITA at first. There's a certain amount of truth in "no pain, no gain" though (but the old-style version - there's no juice for oratory).

So the first thing you need to ask yourself is how much you want this.

 

[Rodafina]

@Zalzo Zen

I have definitely experienced what you are talking about, too.

For me, it has quite a lot to do with the setting. If the setting is quiet and I can speak slowly and stim without embarrassment, I do much better. I surprise myself at how much spinning my fidget gears helps me to say what I want to say. Closing my eyes also helps me to get the words out right.

When there is too much sensory stimulation or I am speaking to a person who moves the conversation along pretty quickly, I experience exactly what you described.

 

[Zalzo Zen]

Thank you all for your kind responses!

It's a form of dyspraxia and also effects the prosody, a common occurrence in autism. It's a processing delay. The only way for me to minimize it is to consciously focus upon keeping my mind in a relaxed state and speaking slowly and steadily.

Looking back on this and I do remember going to a speech class when I had a bad stutter when I was younger. Tbh I couldn't see the connection for the longest time as that stutter went away over time. I do admit that I forget to slow down when talking about something in the moment

It is something I am working on by talking with more people and getting more comfortable, just had a hard time understanding what this was. Ya'll have a wonderful day!