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New Here. Have been in denial.

FarmGirl

FarmGirl

Active Member
Hi all,
I'm new to the forum. I've signed up because I'm hoping to connect with others who can help me and maybe whom I can help, too. I first read about Aspergers earlier this year after searching and searching online for answers to problems I've always dealt with. I'll never forget when I first read up on this, I felt like someone was finally describing who I am and how I approach life. It was a huge relief!

...And then I went into denial and have struggled ever since. I've not done a formal diagnosis and wonder what that would benefit since I'm in my 30's now?

I do have children and have often wondered if each of them have the same thing?

Looking forward to making new friends here!
 
Understandable. I went through my own denial myself. But my curiosity got the best of me and eventually my logic overcame my denial. I'm still self-diagnosed, although at my age a formal diagnosis doesn't seem necessary for now.

But once you're self-aware, you're in a better position to improve things, when and where possible. And to know and accept whatever limitations you may have.

Welcome to AC.
 
I found out the same way you did. It was a few years ago that I saw a list of symptoms for Aspergers. It was one of those aha moments when the light goes on. In my 70's now, I had a lot of previously confusing situations clarified. My wife now knows and helps me a lot by interpreting the social cues for me.
Instead of the formal diagnosis, as a mature adult, you know about yourself now. Once we're entered into the healthcare system they can pigeonhole us and limit our opportunities, so I like to stay away from the government healthcare system.
Being an Aspie is not a disease, it's just a difference. Some very successful people are reputed to be Aspies: Einstein, Bill Gates, etc.
Please ask questions around this site. There's a lot of very helpful folks.
 
I got diagnosed in my 30's. I always knew something was different about me, I never di understand why, I just happened to be reading about a man who got diagnosed in his 50's in the news and reading the traits really hit home and described me. I told my partner about it and she agreed and I did more research and I felt for the first time in my life, that my life made more sense to me. Then like you I went through the denial phase but I got a referral to see a specialist and got a diagnosis. It was a massive relief and also a small burden in that I was not going to change into the person who I wanted to be.
But now after a few years I can acknowledge who I am and what my strengths and weaknesses are.
 
For those that are self-diagnosed, do you tell people? Family, close friends? I think that my family wouldn't believe it and might refuse to ever try to understand me unless I had a formal diagnosis. And I feel weird in thinking and saying that about them. But they've always been incredibly impatient and annoyed with me.

I've been following Temple Grandin's story and am fascinated by that woman! She's an inspiration.

Thank you for the warm welcome!
 
Hello FarmGirl, welcome to AC. I have children too but no chickens unfortunately, I love fresh eggs!
 
Welcome!!!! :)

I am in my 30s and getting an assessment in a little over a week from now. I have 3 children with 1 officially diagnosed with ASD. In my family, I've only told my husband, his aunt I'm close to, and my sister. I don't plan on telling anyone else anytime soon.
 
I'm self-diagnosed as well and can't seem to figure out for the life of me how to tell my family. I believe that they will not understand and try to dismiss the whole thing so I don't say a word. Idk what to do either.
 
Self diagnosed also. I don't see the need to tell anyone. If the situation arises there are a couple of close friends and family members I would feel comfortable discussing it with. Most people in my life would be dismissive or just not be able to understand.
 
FarmGirl said:
For those that are self-diagnosed, do you tell people? Family, close friends? I think that my family wouldn't believe it and might refuse to ever try to understand me unless I had a formal diagnosis. And I feel weird in thinking and saying that about them. But they've always been incredibly impatient and annoyed with me.

I've been following Temple Grandin's story and am fascinated by that woman! She's an inspiration.

Thank you for the warm welcome!
Click to expand...

"Need-know-basis-only". Otherwise telling people even those presumed to be closest to you can be risky. To the point where it might potentially change the relationship you thought you had with such people.
 
Self-diagnosis is kind of like limbo. You can try it on and see if it fits, but you'll never know for sure.* Some of my autie children (including one lower-functioning one) and I were diagnosed with Attention Deficit, first, but it became clear over time that that diagnosis was incorrect.

*It is that fact that will keep your relatives skeptical. The good news is that there is no down side to, at least, trying some ASD coping strategies.
 
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