New here, I'm 38 and sick of acting...

[C Flo]

Hello, I'm 38 years old and new here. I've known that I've been an Aspie for years and slowly started owning it more and more. What can I say, it's a bit of a lonely life, no friends and a lot of acting in order to maintain my level of success.

I've been blessed to find a woman that has grown to understand me and we've had two wonderful children together. I live on Long Island and work in Manhattan.

I'm not big on sharing, part of my defense mechanism, but look forward to becoming comfortable and contributing to the group.

 

[Danny 74]

Helloooo c flo....!

 

[tree]

 

[Nitro]

 

[Amy Susan Rose]

Welcome. My two greatest allies in life are my kids! Happy you have found your soulmate and this site.

 

[Tyrantus1212]

'Lo Flo! I'm really happy for you bud. I'm almost 30 and I never dated, and I too have been pretty lonely with very few friends, often times zero. I'm also happy that you joined this community; we contribute BACK to those who contribute to it! I'm fairly new here but already learned quite a bit from my fellow Aspies.

I wouldn't say I hate acting NT but I can definitely say that I'm extremely bad at it. No matter what the situation, my personality always spills out. Judging by what I said above about never having dated, it obviously means I haven't found the right woman, and I've been doubting my whole life if I ever would. I did manage to find a couple of friends who understand me though, and that's one heck of a miracle. Not to mention them being right around the corner...

But before now I've been lonely for the most part; in childhood it was by choice, but later on it was due to how bad I was at acting NT and trying to fit in. That's a whole other story though.

 

[Ambi]

Hello, I'm 38 years old and new here. I've known that I've been an Aspie for years and slowly started owning it more and more. What can I say, it's a bit of a lonely life, no friends and a lot of acting in order to maintain my level of success.

I've been blessed to find a woman that has grown to understand me and we've had two wonderful children together. I live on Long Island and work in Manhattan.

I'm not big on sharing, part of my defense mechanism, but look forward to becoming comfortable and contributing to the group.

I'm looking forward to your posts! I just self-diagnosed within the past year, and I am burned out from acting, but I'm not sure what I'm going to do - keep trying to act, or come up with a new happy medium that enables me to be in the world in a healthier way. Welcome!

 

[SusanLR]

Welcome! I always said we carry a bag of masks as we go out into the world. I seem to have become quite good at acting the way NTs find acceptable for short periods of time as needed. But, it's never comfortable so I don't get too close. The act can only go on for so long. If you are around someone a lot or have to live with them, they eventually catch on I've found. I act when I need to. If it serves no purpose, I don't. I like to keep things on a peaceful level without being asked a million questions about why this and that regarding my life.
So the show must go on...I guess. Leaves one feeling alone though.

 

[Momo]

Welcome to the forum of polite online weirdos.

 

[StephF]

Hi there

 

[xudo]

Welcome

 

[Bella Pines]

Well then by some miracle you have found the right place. I'm 41 years old, proud of my aspergers and wouldn't want to be any other way, no friends as such and a hell of a lot of acting to continue functioning in a high pressure job in the city of London. Considered successful but am a bit meh about the whole thing. After a while my smile makes my cheeks ache.

Blessed to have found an NT (neurotypical) husband who over 17 hard fought years has grown to understand and accept me. He actually sees my shutdowns coming before I do and sends me out alone for a coffee. We have 2 adorable children, bizarrely enough, neither of them have yet to show any aspie or autistic signs.

However, I have my passions to keep me going. I am working to be a author, short storywriter, children's book illustrator, photographer and maybe when the mortgage/kids education is under control I might go back to college to study neuroscience.

The forum is refreshing, there is a highly unusual level of acceptance here. If you have specific aspie traits like getting obsessed about a project, collecting things, not really understanding emotional NTs or having to act your way through an NT dominated society, then this is all considered normal.

So welcome