New here!

[Terpsichore]

Hi, I'm new. I suspect I have autism, but I'm not seeking a formal diagnosis

I'm a mom of 3. I love dance and fantasy and video games. I started to wonder if I had autism when I realized the only people I can hang out with without being completely drained of energy all suspect they have autism. I also have an autistic brother and an autistic child (his dad and I sat through his assessment going "but all those things are normal! We did all that as kids!)

I've always had problems with fatigue and emotional regulation and I'm starting to wonder if these are more autism induced than anything else.

I feel like my nervous system is just an on/off switch with jittery nervous energy on one side and extreme fatigue on the other with no in-between Does anyone else feel like that? What do you do about it? I'm wondering if the jittery nervous energy is just my attempt to mask and do everything and avoid criticism and the fatigue is just a result of that being unsustainable? How do I acheive a sustainable middle ground?

Anyway, I guess I'm here to see how much I relate to you all and get some advice if you have any?

 

[tree]

 

[WhitewaterWoman]

Welcome.

Before I retired, I certainly had days I could get a lot of work done, and others when I had to completely rest. That has smoothed out a lot with retirement.

You have a lot on your plate raising 3 kids, one with autism, and running a household. Pacing helps me get through the day. Taking frequent breaks. Masking is exhausting.

 

[FayetheADHDsquirrel]

Welcome!

 

[the_tortoise]

 

[Grondhammar]

Hi Terpsichore, love the username! I did my undergraduate work in Classics and that's a perfect name to match your interests

I don't know if it's related, but your statement about fatigue caught my eye due to some recent reading. I'm almost done going through some recent research (Jan 2025) aimed at trying to correct the male-bias in autism detection, specifically focussing on how monotropism shows up in girls & women. It seems quite different.

The below link is behind a paywall unfortunately, but if a local library can get this to you, it may be a good read: Autism, Gender Differences, and Monotropism

A small abstract that may be helpful:

"Due to being naturally more socially aware (having XX chromosome: see The importance of having two X chromosomes - PMC) social observational behaviour may be more available. This allows females to learn early on how to act ‘as if they have understood’ a social convention or expectation, even when they haven’t. Therefore, their actions act as a type of mask (Allely, 2019; Lawson, 2020). This is not a mask of their choosing, but one as seen by others, allowing an individual to cope outwardly, while desperately paddling below the surface to stay afloat (Allely, 2019; Lawson, 2020). ... However, this pretense takes much energy and is exhausting way beyond usual limits seen in the typical population."

I hope you can enjoy being here and can relate and get the advice you're looking for. I wish I knew an easy answer to give you!

 

[717]

hi, welcome.

 

[Neonatal RRT]

Hi, I'm new. I suspect I have autism, but I'm not seeking a formal diagnosis

I'm a mom of 3. I love dance and fantasy and video games. I started to wonder if I had autism when I realized the only people I can hang out with without being completely drained of energy all suspect they have autism. I also have an autistic brother and an autistic child (his dad and I sat through his assessment going "but all those things are normal! We did all that as kids!)

I've always had problems with fatigue and emotional regulation and I'm starting to wonder if these are more autism induced than anything else.

I feel like my nervous system is just an on/off switch with jittery nervous energy on one side and extreme fatigue on the other with no in-between Does anyone else feel like that? What do you do about it? I'm wondering if the jittery nervous energy is just my attempt to mask and do everything and avoid criticism and the fatigue is just a result of that being unsustainable? How do I acheive a sustainable middle ground?

Anyway, I guess I'm here to see how much I relate to you all and get some advice if you have any?

First of all... welcome.

What you are experiencing with regards to the mental fatigue and emotional dysregulation is consistent with the autism experience. I often view these things from a medical perspective, so that said...

What has been gleaned from post-mortem studies of the autistic brain is that (1) with regards to the "mental exhaustion" perspective... the neurons themselves often have far more synaptic connections than say, the neurotypical. More synaptic connections can translate into more energy being used...a higher metabolic rate, more demand for "fuel", more metabolic wastes, and more likely to have excitatory-to-inhibitory neurotransmitter imbalances, as well as oxygen radical-to-antioxidant imbalances. (2) There are often far more neurons packed into the brain, as well, due to a general lack of neural pruning that occurs when we are toddlers and in our teenage years. (3) There can be altered layering of the grey matter...and higher density of the white matter. (4) Our cerebellum, which actually has 80% of the neurons and is responsible for all manner of fine-motor tuning, is also of a different microanatomy.

Taken together, this all fits with this idea that "function follows form" in terms of our sensory experience, mental exhaustion, emotional dysregulation, and fine-motor coordination (which includes verbal skills).

What to do with that information? It falls under "management" of your condition... no different than anyone else with a heart, liver, kidney, lung issue.

1. Good sleep. Structured and routine. L-theanine, magnesium glycinate, melatonin... sometimes all together, may help.
2. Pace yourself. At work what that may look like is a handful of 5-10 minute "mini breaks" in a quiet environment throughout the day... long enough to relax and refuel... but not long enough that people are going to miss you and complain.
3. Limit or eliminate caffeine... I know, blasphemous to say that, but given what I said above, turning up the fire might not be the best idea.
4. Creatine...not for bodybuilders anymore... 5, 10, 20g of creatine helps tremendously with energy metabolism in the brain. It has a lot of studies behind it. Check it out.
5. L-theanine... 200-400mg... helps with the excitatory-to-inhibitory neurotransmitter imbalance. Calms the mind.
6. N-acetyl cysteine, Co-Q-10, and Epicatechin... all strong antioxidants and help intra and extracellular oxidative stress.
7. Insulin has the effect of vasodilation... amongst other things... but in the autistic brain it may mean increased perfusion to the point of increasing pressure within the brain and giving you that mental "fog" and/or a sensation that your brain is swollen. Minimize your simple sugars..."junk food"..."insulin spikers". Go for low-glycemic, poly and monounsaturated fats. Avoid protein shakes and bars... they are potent insulin spikers... but do eat good protein sources. Portion control is important. Snacking should be minimized.
8. If you are able to eat a wide variety of foods... great. If not, and your diet is rather restricted, or you have the habit of eating the same meal nearly every day... then, take a broad-spectrum probiotic. The more different types of bacteria, the better. Gut flora is often the source of our neurotransmitters, so you don't want to be in a situation where there is overgrowth of any one type as this can contribute to not only neurotransmitter imbalances but also IBS, IBS-like, or even colitis symptoms.
9. Across the general population, roughly 40% of us have a MTHFR gene mutation (highest in the female autistic population) that doesn't allow us to methylate...a key reaction needed for B-vitamin and folic acid/folate metabolism. B vitamins are needed for energy metabolism. If you choose to take a B-vitamin complex and folic acid/folate supplement... specifically look for a "methylated" version, as it has already been through that reduction and your body can actually use it.

Hope this has been useful.

 

[Judge]

Sounds like you've definitely come to the right place. There's no better perspective you can have than being able to identify and share with others of your own kind.

Welcome to the Autism Forums.

 

[Terpsichore]

Thanks so much everyone!

First of all... welcome.

What you are experiencing with regards to the mental fatigue and emotional dysregulation is consistent with the autism experience. I often view these things from a medical perspective, so that said...

What has been gleaned from post-mortem studies of the autistic brain is that (1) with regards to the "mental exhaustion" perspective... the neurons themselves often have far more synaptic connections than say, the neurotypical. More synaptic connections can translate into more energy being used...a higher metabolic rate, more demand for "fuel", more metabolic wastes, and more likely to have excitatory-to-inhibitory neurotransmitter imbalances, as well as oxygen radical-to-antioxidant imbalances. (2) There are often far more neurons packed into the brain, as well, due to a general lack of neural pruning that occurs when we are toddlers and in our teenage years. (3) There can be altered layering of the grey matter...and higher density of the white matter. (4) Our cerebellum, which actually has 80% of the neurons and is responsible for all manner of fine-motor tuning, is also of a different microanatomy.

Taken together, this all fits with this idea that "function follows form" in terms of our sensory experience, mental exhaustion, emotional dysregulation, and fine-motor coordination (which includes verbal skills).

What to do with that information? It falls under "management" of your condition... no different than anyone else with a heart, liver, kidney, lung issue.

1. Good sleep. Structured and routine. L-theanine, magnesium glycinate, melatonin... sometimes all together, may help.
2. Pace yourself. At work what that may look like is a handful of 5-10 minute "mini breaks" in a quiet environment throughout the day... long enough to relax and refuel... but not long enough that people are going to miss you and complain.
3. Limit or eliminate caffeine... I know, blasphemous to say that, but given what I said above, turning up the fire might not be the best idea.
4. Creatine...not for bodybuilders anymore... 5, 10, 20g of creatine helps tremendously with energy metabolism in the brain. It has a lot of studies behind it. Check it out.
5. L-theanine... 200-400mg... helps with the excitatory-to-inhibitory neurotransmitter imbalance. Calms the mind.
6. N-acetyl cysteine, Co-Q-10, and Epicatechin... all strong antioxidants and help intra and extracellular oxidative stress.
7. Insulin has the effect of vasodilation... amongst other things... but in the autistic brain it may mean increased perfusion to the point of increasing pressure within the brain and giving you that mental "fog" and/or a sensation that your brain is swollen. Minimize your simple sugars..."junk food"..."insulin spikers". Go for low-glycemic, poly and monounsaturated fats. Avoid protein shakes and bars... they are potent insulin spikers... but do eat good protein sources. Portion control is important. Snacking should be minimized.
8. If you are able to eat a wide variety of foods... great. If not, and your diet is rather restricted, or you have the habit of eating the same meal nearly every day... then, take a broad-spectrum probiotic. The more different types of bacteria, the better. Gut flora is often the source of our neurotransmitters, so you don't want to be in a situation where there is overgrowth of any one type as this can contribute to not only neurotransmitter imbalances but also IBS, IBS-like, or even colitis symptoms.
9. Across the general population, roughly 40% of us have a MTHFR gene mutation (highest in the female autistic population) that doesn't allow us to methylate...a key reaction needed for B-vitamin and folic acid/folate metabolism. B vitamins are needed for energy metabolism. If you choose to take a B-vitamin complex and folic acid/folate supplement... specifically look for a "methylated" version, as it has already been through that reduction and your body can actually use it.

Hope this has been useful.

That is so helpful! Thank you! I'm actually already doing several of those. I've never tolerated caffeine and magnesium has been helping a lot and I found out I have MTHFR mutation (I did a gene sequencing to rule out the dangerous forms of Ehlers-danlos) and I make sure to do methylated b vitamins

I had heard good things about creatine but was like "do I really need another supplement?" But I think I've seen enough recommendations to give it a try

I havent heard of L theanine, N-acetyl cysteine, or Co-Q-10, but I'll look into them

I don't feel like I've found any strategies for taking breaks that really helps me. I'm still trying to figure that one out

 

[Kitsuna]

Hi, welcome!

 

[Rodafina]

Hello and welcome, @Terpsichore. I think that your intro posts demonstrates the idea the "normal" really is a relative term. I hope you recognize what's normal around here as what's normal for you and your family, too.