Noisy Christmas Merriment

[Rasputin]

This is my second Christmas post today.

So my wife and I went over to a niece’s home for Christmas. We had a nice family dinner, and then someone brought out a gambling game of some kind.

I don’t gamble, so I declined to participate. Then as the game got going there was unconstrained shouting, screaming and howling due to the extreme fun everyone was having. I put in my noise cancellation Airpod Pro earbuds, and am now spending the Christmas evening sitting in the kitchen by myself.

For those of you lamenting spending Christmas by yourself, I just want you to know that spending Christmas with family is not necessarily a picnic either. Not fewer than four family members have asked me what is wrong, and no one understands hyperacusis (hypersensitivity to sound).

Enjoy the rest of the evening everyone!

 

[Fino]

I assume you are unable to leave to further rooms or outside?

 

[Thinx]

I would have prearranged to leave after the meal. Although I wouldn't actually if I am honest, have gone in the first place. Nothing wrong with spending Christmas alone. Rather enjoyable indeed. Done that sometimes. But in any case I don't feel comfortable with indoor gatherings just now due to Covid.

It's been pleasantly quiet here. Myself and partner went for a walk, and later had a delicious home cooked meal. Roast beef etc. Probably same again for Boxing Day. After that we'll get started on some house projects and hobbies again.

I'm guessing you showed up partly to please your partner who likes to mix with family? Hope she's had a good time.

 

[Rasputin]

I assume you are unable to leave to further rooms or outside?

That was correct. I went to the basement before going to the kitchen, however the basement was too cold. The temperature outside was well below freezing. My wife finally gave me her car keys so I could drive home. She caught a ride home with her sister.

 

[Rasputin]

I would have prearranged to leave after the meal. Although I wouldn't actually if I am honest, have gone in the first place. Nothing wrong with spending Christmas alone. Rather enjoyable indeed. Done that sometimes. But in any case I don't feel comfortable with indoor gatherings just now due to Covid.

It's been pleasantly quiet here. Myself and partner went for a walk, and later had a delicious home cooked meal. Roast beef etc. Probably same again for Boxing Day. After that we'll get started on some house projects and hobbies again.

I'm guessing you showed up partly to please your partner who likes to mix with family? Hope she's had a good time.

My partner (wife) had a great time. Not going was not an option, as it would have been unacceptable to my wife. I finally was able to get her car keys so I could drive myself home. This is not the first Christmas I have spent in isolation, while family celebrated Christmas.

 

[Misery]

"Gambling game"?

Was it like a board game or something? I know there are games based on betting and risk taking and such. Though, I gotta say, even as a board game fan myself, I'd have a hard time tolerating a loud group.

This is not the first Christmas I have spent in isolation, while family celebrated Christmas.

This part I can sympathize with. I mostly did the same thing.

 

[Gerontius]

was down stairs and heard the Christmas Day kitchen fight start among the landlady & her family--highly educated, professional, artistic, family still decided to throw a regular Donnybrook in the kitchen on Christmas Day.

So I stayed down below, worked on practicing the organ, wrote and drank and drank & wrote. It was a good day. I had a pint of hard cider which I'd chilled down in a coffeepot packed with snow. Quite good. Unfortunately as it was fairly strong and I am not very large I ended up getting that "long Christmas nap" early.

Being alone on Christmas is often a pleasant thing. Called up family too.


A Christmas visit from an ATF agent-- Alcohol, Typewriters, Fireplaces.

 

[Neonatal RRT]

This is a common topic we've discussed before. How do people with auditory sensory issues deal with social environments? Obviously, you found your earbuds. I have such horrible tinnitus, silence, or the lack of ambient noise, makes my tinnitus come to the forefront, instead of the background,...earbuds would not be good for me. On the other hand, I also have sensitivities to certain frequencies and decibel levels,...finding some sort of balance is something I deal with daily. I have done things like sitting in another room, taking a nap, leaving and going for a walk by myself,...but others who don't know what you're going through are likely to interpret that behavior as that "you don't like them" or you're "anti-social",...or worse. At work, and now with social situations,...I take "mini-breaks",...5-10 minutes alone in another room,...collect myself,...then back into the situation. The balance being that I can "pace myself", but still be somewhat present and interacting with others.

 

[LadyS]

I would agree. My family is large so gatherings tend to be loud and chaotic, which always takes away the enjoyment for myself. I was finding myself grateful for the isolation part of the pandemic and having the option of a "just us" Christmas. Not all of us enjoy having people in our faces expecting you to be "holiday sociable". Especially with family members who aren't exactly the warm loving type.

Gatherings we have always end up feeling empty and forced because it's expected to have them and you're supposed to be having a good time and are criticized when you're not showing it.

 

[Suzette]

My husbands sister inlaw insists on dominating conversation at 30 decibels. Her children, used to the tactic, just talk louder to get their own voices heard. I feel physically ill after an hour of this. I escape to my room, or to the back yard with the dog. And my mother, going deaf, refuses to wear hear hearing aids so the t.v. is always so loud you can easily follow a show from anywhere in the house.

Like @Neonatal RRT, I have tinitus and usually find ear plugs and the like to amplify my own head noise. But there are high fidelity ear plugs, designed for musicians, that lower the volume of sounds without blocking them. I am going to try some. On Amazon they cost $20 to $30 U.S. d.

I also want to find glasses that significantly cut glare without blocking light too much. My eyesight is pretty poor and even with prescription sunglassess I get too much visual snow that obscures my vision. Light helps cut it down but I am still bothered by glare. I hope I explained that well.
I have even thought about getting those Inuit "glassess" that are just little bars to cut glare. My husband accepts that I am a weirdo, but those glassess might be a step too far for him.

 

[Rasputin]

"Gambling game"?

Was it like a board game or something? I know there are games based on betting and risk taking and such. Though, I gotta say, even as a board game fan myself, I'd have a hard time tolerating a loud group.



This part I can sympathize with. I mostly did the same thing.

Yes, it was a horse racing board game.

 

[Rasputin]

My husbands sister inlaw insists on dominating conversation at 30 decibels. Her children, used to the tactic, just talk louder to get their own voices heard. I feel physically ill after an hour of this. I escape to my room, or to the back yard with the dog. And my mother, going deaf, refuses to wear hear hearing aids so the t.v. is always so loud you can easily follow a show from anywhere in the house.

Like @Neonatal RRT, I have tinitus and usually find ear plugs and the like to amplify my own head noise. But there are high fidelity ear plugs, designed for musicians, that lower the volume of sounds without blocking them. I am going to try some. On Amazon they cost $20 to $30 U.S. d.

I also want to find glasses that significantly cut glare without blocking light too much. My eyesight is pretty poor and even with prescription sunglassess I get too much visual snow that obscures my vision. Light helps cut it down but I am still bothered by glare. I hope I explained that well.
I have even thought about getting those Inuit "glassess" that are just little bars to cut glare. My husband accepts that I am a weirdo, but those glassess might be a step too far for him.

The new AirPods Pro have something called Conversation Boost that works in transparency mode to allow you to interact in a noisy environment while cancelling out background noises. You can even amplify conversations if you need to. I find that they actually work very well. When playing music, however, you should not listen at high volume.

 

[Matthias]

This is my second Christmas post today.

So my wife and I went over to a niece’s home for Christmas. We had a nice family dinner, and then someone brought out a gambling game of some kind.

I don’t gamble, so I declined to participate. Then as the game got going there was unconstrained shouting, screaming and howling due to the extreme fun everyone was having. I put in my noise cancellation Airpod Pro earbuds, and am now spending the Christmas evening sitting in the kitchen by myself.

For those of you lamenting spending Christmas by yourself, I just want you to know that spending Christmas with family is not necessarily a picnic either. Not fewer than four family members have asked me what is wrong, and no one understands hyperacusis (hypersensitivity to sound).

I'd educate them about hyperacusis and how noise affects you. If they continued their unconstrained shouting, screaming and howling, I'd let them know that what's wrong is their lack of respect and concern for your wellbeing as they indulge their selfish desire to be rowdy at your expense.

 

[Suzette]

I'd educate them about hyperacusis and how noise affects you. If they continued their unconstrained shouting, screaming and howling, I'd let them know that what's wrong is their lack of respect and concern for your wellbeing as they indulge their selfish desire to be rowdy at your expense.

I have discovered that most people are not inclined to be helpful when you insist that your problem is their problem. Ear plugs or even air pods are much easier to acquire than cooperation.

 

[Rasputin]

I'd educate them about hyperacusis and how noise affects you. If they continued their unconstrained shouting, screaming and howling, I'd let them know that what's wrong is their lack of respect and concern for your wellbeing as they indulge their selfish desire to be rowdy at your expense.

Great suggestion, but it did not work. I did explain the problem, and this was met with blank stares.My wife offered me her car keys to leave, and I accepted. Their perspective is that hyperacusis is my problem, not theirs.

 

[Rasputin]

I have discovered that most people are not inclined to be helpful when you insist that your problem is their problem. Ear plugs or ever air pods are much easier to acquire than cooperation.

Your discovery has been my experience as well.

 

[Gerontius]

My husbands sister inlaw insists on dominating conversation at 30 decibels. Her children, used to the tactic, just talk louder to get their own voices heard. I feel physically ill after an hour of this. I escape to my room, or to the back yard with the dog. And my mother, going deaf, refuses to wear hear hearing aids so the t.v. is always so loud you can easily follow a show from anywhere in the house.

Like @Neonatal RRT, I have tinitus and usually find ear plugs and the like to amplify my own head noise. But there are high fidelity ear plugs, designed for musicians, that lower the volume of sounds without blocking them. I am going to try some. On Amazon they cost $20 to $30 U.S. d.

I also want to find glasses that significantly cut glare without blocking light too much. My eyesight is pretty poor and even with prescription sunglassess I get too much visual snow that obscures my vision. Light helps cut it down but I am still bothered by glare. I hope I explained that well.
I have even thought about getting those Inuit "glassess" that are just little bars to cut glare. My husband accepts that I am a weirdo, but those glassess might be a step too far for him.

I wear blue-light blocking glasses and they do not look too far out of the ordinary.

 

[Suzette]

I wear blue-light blocking glasses and they do not look too far out of the ordinary.

I wonder if I could get a blue light blocking coating for my prescription glasses. As I get older light and noise are more problematic than they have ever been.

It could also be, now that I am aware of my a.s.d. doing something about these issues seems more acceptable.

 

[Gerontius]

I wonder if I could get a blue light blocking coating for my prescription glasses. As I get older light and noise are more problematic than they have ever been.

It could also be, now that I am aware of my a.s.d. doing something about these issues seems more acceptable.

I'm almost certain you could--get a nice strong one; you won't regret it. They have been a game-changer for me, allowing me to do things like not wreck the car, pursue a college education, and look at people without squinting like an off-brand Clint Eastwood.

 

[Rasputin]

My husbands sister inlaw insists on dominating conversation at 30 decibels. Her children, used to the tactic, just talk louder to get their own voices heard. I feel physically ill after an hour of this. I escape to my room, or to the back yard with the dog. And my mother, going deaf, refuses to wear hear hearing aids so the t.v. is always so loud you can easily follow a show from anywhere in the house.

Like @Neonatal RRT, I have tinitus and usually find ear plugs and the like to amplify my own head noise. But there are high fidelity ear plugs, designed for musicians, that lower the volume of sounds without blocking them. I am going to try some. On Amazon they cost $20 to $30 U.S. d.

I also want to find glasses that significantly cut glare without blocking light too much. My eyesight is pretty poor and even with prescription sunglassess I get too much visual snow that obscures my vision. Light helps cut it down but I am still bothered by glare. I hope I explained that well.
I have even thought about getting those Inuit "glassess" that are just little bars to cut glare. My husband accepts that I am a weirdo, but those glassess might be a step too far for him.

You should discuss with your Opthalmologist. I wear special prescription computer glasses which reduce glare from the computer screen. I know it’s not the same thing, but maybe there is tinting that would help.