Not sure if this is the right place to post... but it's about relationships....

[ladybug]

ok, so I'm going to ask... do aspies need a lot of sleep.... I mean a lot!! Min 10 hrs...?!?! My partner says he cannot function if he can't get 10 hours on a week day and more on the weekend... he trains and works hard... Is it a real need..? My son (also aspie) only needs 6 hrs max per night even less at weekends... granted he is 18 and my partner is mid 50's... but my partner says he's always needed lots of sleep... is it an aspie thing? And if so, how do you manage with work and a social life....?!?
Advice please....??

 

[Questella]

I tend to need a large amount of sleep. Being pregnant I need a minimum of 12 hours most nights and 18 a few days. Normally I couldn't function on less than 7-9. I'd prefer 8-10. Sucks.

 

[Judge]

I've never averaged more than seven and a half hours of sleep tops.

Many years ago I survived on about six hours of sleep for a very long time.

How does this Aspie manage his social life? That's easy. I don't really have one.

 

[mw2530]

I am good on 7 or 8 hours. The issue for me is the quality of the sleep. Chronic insomnia has been a huge problem for me for a number of years. I never feel rested when I wake up in the morning even if I'm laying down for over 8 yours. My crazy mind is just never able to shut off so I never seem to fall into a deep, restorative sleep. I suspect that is why your man says he needs so much sleep. He either can't fall asleep or wakes up in the middle of the night.

 

[Streetwise]

DONT have one COULDNT function i HAVENT slept properly for ten years
the most i get is 5 hours sometimes i wake up after two hours
i always wanted more than twelve thats a sign of depression understandable cells have to repair

 

[kay]

Average sleep range is 7-10 hours. I'm 45 and need 9-11 hours a night, depending on what I've been doing. Don't know that it is an aspie thing or not. I think insomnia is. Used to have that until a little over 5 years ago. Not sure what happened but I think it was two IPA beers that cured it ( I normally would only have one). I quit drinking (just decided it isn't a very healthy thing) and I still sleep just fine.

 

[Tyrantus1212]

This is just me, but I get around 7 hours of sleep each night, I tend to be very reluctant in terms of going to sleep - but I can work and function just fine the following day. I'm almost 30 years old. I'm very much a night owl and I cannot stand mornings. I can't even stand people telling me "good morning" because...well, it's morning. I can go to sleep as late as 5 or 6 AM on certain weekends, if I'm not tired; if I am tired then I just pass out involuntarily. I can still call 7 hours "lack of sleep", they say at least 8 is optimal.

Social life - well I don't really have much of one, only made a few friends in recent years and I text them way too much, even when I'm up all night I often just have some random thought enter my mind and I text it to them. I always have something on my mind, whether it's anxiety or something exciting. I mostly communicate with my parents and live in their home, and mornings/lack of sleep tend to have adverse effects in that regard. I'm much more likely to have my outbursts in the morning time before heading off to work. When I feel sane I just don't understand how these outbursts even get triggered, and at the smallest things. Even when I get enough sleep my mood is still unstable in the morning; that doesn't change the fact that I can't stand getting up early.

 

[ladybug]

I tend to need a large amount of sleep. Being pregnant I need a minimum of 12 hours most nights and 18 a few days. Normally I couldn't function on less than 7-9. I'd prefer 8-10. Sucks.

Oh I remember that.... it's like, you are making a whole other person..!! Of course you're tired...!

 

[ladybug]

I am good on 7 or 8 hours. The issue for me is the quality of the sleep. Chronic insomnia has been a huge problem for me for a number of years. I never feel rested when I wake up in the morning even if I'm laying down for over 8 yours. My crazy mind is just never able to shut off so I never seem to fall into a deep, restorative sleep. I suspect that is why your man says he needs so much sleep. He either can't fall asleep or wakes up in the middle of the night.

This is spot on..! He does say he wakes most nights around 2-4am.... works a bit then back to bed... when I stay over he does sleep right through...

 

[ladybug]

This is just me, but I get around 7 hours of sleep each night, I tend to be very reluctant in terms of going to sleep - but I can work and function just fine the following day. I'm almost 30 years old. I'm very much a night owl and I cannot stand mornings. I can't even stand people telling me "good morning" because...well, it's morning. I can go to sleep as late as 5 or 6 AM on certain weekends, if I'm not tired; if I am tired then I just pass out involuntarily. I can still call 7 hours "lack of sleep", they say at least 8 is optimal.

Social life - well I don't really have much of one, only made a few friends in recent years and I text them way too much, even when I'm up all night I often just have some random thought enter my mind and I text it to them. I always have something on my mind, whether it's anxiety or something exciting. I mostly communicate with my parents and live in their home, and mornings/lack of sleep tend to have adverse effects in that regard. I'm much more likely to have my outbursts in the morning time before heading off to work. When I feel sane I just don't understand how these outbursts even get triggered, and at the smallest things. Even when I get enough sleep my mood is still unstable in the morning; that doesn't change the fact that I can't stand getting up early.

Well, that's interesting... he's NOT a morning person, but says he has make himself be pleasant to those he works with...!!!

 

[xudo]

Aspies, like everyone else are all different. I would like to get more sleep than I do, but I manage perfectly well with what I get. My friend is HFA and can sleep for way longer than any human should, and can't function without it. In her case though, I think this is more to do with the fact that she's gotten used to doing that, so her body now feels like it needs it. I have a couple of NT friends, and some don't sleep for very long at all per night and that's right for them and then others who have to get 8 hours a night to be functional and also take a nap in the afternoon.

 

[Datura]

I am not diagnosed, but I average about 9 hours of sleep a night. Granted, my sleep patterns are a bit eratic and I do not believe my circadian rhythms are synced to a 24 hour clock.

I have actually been teased by co-workers because I am still relatively young and "should" be able to get by on less sleep, but that is just not how my body works. On the odd night I might get by on 6 hours of sleep, but if I will have to make it up somewhere.

As for balancing sleep with work and a social life; I wasn't the best at it. Generally I sacrificed sleep, and my social life, which made me pretty miserable, to the point that I am no longer able to work, so now the pendulum has swung the other way.

 

[Adder1234]

Not really, I've gone with only about 4-5 a day for a week and felt exhausted, but I was still able to function.

 

[Nicci]

The more anxious I am in general about everything around me, the more sleep I need. Also, I am pretty much always tired.
There are many possible factors that could be affecting his needs, so you could go see a doctor if it's a big problem.
In terms of advice, I don't really have any. I don't handle it very well when I have long periods of time with extreme sleep needs. I just sleep and let everything else come second. It's not great.