mwgrigs
New Member
Not sure how to introduce myself other than to say that I'm a recently diagnosed autistic and a very scary and thrilling world is opening up to me. I'm 53 years old and have had a stellar career, rising through the ranks in the military, and law enforcement, and as a C-suite technology leader in numerous organizations. I was married for 10 years with my first wife, had a daughter who is now happily married with two darling children. My current wife of 22 years had a son before we met, he is also happily married with two incredible sons of his own. My youngest daughter (with my current wife) recently announced her engagement to a wonderful young man and I'm eager to watch their future unfold. I love football, golf, and trivia. I have traveled extensively overseas and to all but 5 states in the U.S. I speak two languages and I hold a masters of business degree along with my electrical engineering bachelors and, in addition to my full-time career roles, I've been an independent executive coach for nearly 25 years. I serve on numerous boards and both national and international advisory committees and I contribute to government adoption of technology and public safety solutions all across the globe...and all of that nearly fell completely apart because I had absolutely no understanding of what has been going inside my brain!
Over the past 20+ years, in my current marriage, my wife and I have been "at odds" with each other culminating with her accusing me of being an insensitive jerk, poor father and husband, and emotionally absent. The more I learn about my ASD brain, the less defensive I've become and the more I am able to understand her frustrations and unmet expectations. It was on a whim that a family friend, who works as public school counselor, pondered whether I might be on the spectrum. I didn't know what the "spectrum" was. Even though I have two nephews who were diagnosed with Aspergers, it never occurred that I might be wrestling with the same things as them. After some research, my wife and I found a reputable adult ASD therapist who conducted the testing/assessment with me and confirmed (very solidly) that I am on the spectrum. At first, I thought it was just new information to factor into what I already knew about myself—I also didn't want to use it as a crutch or excuse. But now I am beginning to see and comprehend the impacts of my being on the spectrum and how it factors into everything. More importantly, I am beginning to understand the detrimental effect of my "masking" all these years and pretending to NOT be on the spectrum.
I am hopeful to gather insights from this forum and contribute where I can to help me and others not only come to terms better understanding this "difference" that we possess, but also learning how to help remove the negative stereotypes and stigma that so often accompany it. Wishing all a blessed and prosperous new year! —Mike
Over the past 20+ years, in my current marriage, my wife and I have been "at odds" with each other culminating with her accusing me of being an insensitive jerk, poor father and husband, and emotionally absent. The more I learn about my ASD brain, the less defensive I've become and the more I am able to understand her frustrations and unmet expectations. It was on a whim that a family friend, who works as public school counselor, pondered whether I might be on the spectrum. I didn't know what the "spectrum" was. Even though I have two nephews who were diagnosed with Aspergers, it never occurred that I might be wrestling with the same things as them. After some research, my wife and I found a reputable adult ASD therapist who conducted the testing/assessment with me and confirmed (very solidly) that I am on the spectrum. At first, I thought it was just new information to factor into what I already knew about myself—I also didn't want to use it as a crutch or excuse. But now I am beginning to see and comprehend the impacts of my being on the spectrum and how it factors into everything. More importantly, I am beginning to understand the detrimental effect of my "masking" all these years and pretending to NOT be on the spectrum.
I am hopeful to gather insights from this forum and contribute where I can to help me and others not only come to terms better understanding this "difference" that we possess, but also learning how to help remove the negative stereotypes and stigma that so often accompany it. Wishing all a blessed and prosperous new year! —Mike
