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NT Newbie

Rachel Roth

Active Member
Hi, I’m Rachel :) I’m a little nervous to join here, as I am an NT. My husband is an Aspie and recent new member Rudy Schmidt. I am a psychologist (with only a bachelor’s degree, not really qualified to do much here :p ) and love working with children, especially ‘at risk’ children (though I hate that phrase! It makes them sound like they’re on the cusp of joining a gang or something, and every one of them I’ve ever met have been -amazing- people!) .

Rudy and I have been married for five years. As he’s already mentioned, the move from his native Wales to America triggered an uptick in his Aspie traits. For five years I had a lot of guilt about that because we had no idea he was an Aspie-I thought his meltdowns were just a sign that he was unhappy with his life. Time and again he would meltdown, seem to lament his choice to leave his home, and I would myself meltdown out of guilt.

Then we realized that he’s an Aspie. That has changed everything for him, mostly for the better. It’s changed a lot for me, too—I no longer view his ‘meltdowns’ as a reason for guilt or even necessarily all that much of a negative thing—it’s just his way of easing off the pressure so he can cope more effectively again.

I myself am ‘differently abled’ as well—I was born with Spina Bifida. There was a hole in my back at birth, and it frayed my spinal column. I cannot feel anything below the knees, and I use a wheelchair to get around.

I was also born with hydrocephalus, or water on the brain-I have a shunt that drains my cerebral spinal fluid. Sometimes these differences cause neurological problems—for example, I get tired after what most people might consider half a day’s work, and I have to lie down for a few minutes to recharge or I get so sleepy I can’t focus (ADHD medication helps with that, but it’s not a fix-all).

I’m joining the forum because a)I have a definite professional interest in Aspergers’ Syndrome, as I’ve helped and hope to continue helping children, some of whom have AS, and b) because this is such a big part of Rudy’s life. He shares everything with me, and I want to be able to share this forum with him, at least partially.

I know I’m long-winded, so thanks for listening. I’m excited to hopefully learn a lot!

~Rachel
 
Hello and welcome Rachel,
I applaud you for wanting to help others, and if there is anything I can do, just ask. I am happy to hear that you and your husband are working things out. Discovering that someone in your close circle has this or something like it, is a real challenge.
Good luck to you.
 
Hi Rachel. Welcome to AC.

Glad to see you can properly read Rudy's need to "recharge". It's one of those things so often misunderstood.
 
Hi Rachel,
I was diagnosed with Aspergers just recently and am also finishing up my bachelors in psychology. My husband has MS and relies on a wheelchair to get around. It seems like we have a similar situation (kind of).
It's really great that you are so supportive of your husband. He's a lucky man.
Take care,
Loray
 
Hello, Rachel! :)

Don't worry. We welcome everybody here. Sometimes our members may disagree during a discussion, but that's part of healthy discourse.

You sound like you're a great role model for those kids---you're positive-thinking, friendly, and hard-working! Thanks so much for sharing a little about yourself. Besides my ASD, which I found out about a few years ago, I've got cerebral palsy, so I know what it's like to be "differently-abled."

I look forward to your contributions to the forum! Welcome!
 
Even before I knew I had Aspergers, I called her my "translator", because she always had to explain to me whether people were trying to insult me or not.

Funny story, actually - this happened when we were dating. It was my first time in America, and my first time in an American restaurant. In the UK, our waiters and waitresses generally do not work for tips, so are under no obligation to be extra specially polite. Here in the USA, customer service with a smile is taken much more seriously. Anyway, we were eating, and this waitress kept coming back and filling glasses and acting so overly polite, with big, grand "hellooooo!"'s and "how're you todaaay?"'s. When she was finished, I turned to my wife (then-girlfriend) and said "snotty cow! What the heck was her problem? What's up with all that sarcasm? Did I do something to upset her!?"

Poor woman's been my translator ever since. :p
 
Welcome to AC :)

My TBI presented me with a brain shunt as well
My shunt was installed to balance my brain hemispheres and had an additional valve added to my neck to prevent a siphon action from standing to quickly...I now have more plumbing hardware than a bathroom :p

Good to hear you are part of a team that is exposed to the spectrum,we need more to understand us,as well as you needing others to understand your woes.

Thanks for trying to understand a bit of the spectrum ;)
 
Peace--thank you! I do like helping people when I can, and I love children.

Judge--thanks for the welcome! I'm still learning, but I'm trying :)

Friday13th--wow, we have a lot in common! :) Sounds like you're supportive of your husband as well :)

Ereth--thank you so much for the warm welcome! I do try to be a good role model, because I can remember being that age and my school counselor (my ultimate dream job for myself) was a role model for me. As of right now I'm volunteering with my university's summer daycare program while I'm looking for a job. Thanks for sharing about your CP, I'm looking forward to being here :)

Rudy--haha, that's still one of my favorite stories xD

Nitro--ah, fellow shunty (as I call them)! I understand the whole "more plumbing than a bathroom" thing, I get (playfully) teased about that all the time xD This weather is killing me because I get headaches everytime there is a bad thunder storm, and that's been several times a week this summer!

Thanks again, everyone, for the warm reception :) I look forward to getting to know everyone!

~Rachel
 
Welcome Rachel :)

It's always good to see more people taking a genuine interest in AS, and supporting their loved ones. I hope that you can find this forum to be a great resource for information.

Should you wish to also browse our recommended reading section, we have a great collection:
Resources | AspiesCentral.com
 

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