Odd encounter today

[Jumpinbare]

Because I am very touch-averse, when I will be shopping, I routinely wear one of my t shirts with the words "Please don't touch me. I'm autistic." printed on it.
Today, after leaving the store, I was unlocking the door of my car. A teenage boy, I maybe 15, walked right up to me like he was going to ask a question. He stopped, looked at my shirt, then up at my face with a questioning look, but said nothing. After several awkward seconds, I looked down at my shirt and back up at his face and nodded.
He then reached out a finger and touched my sleeve without actually poking me. Then he turned and walked away without a word. I thought maybe he was nonverbal autistic, but even if he was, I still can't make sense of what he did.

 

[WhitewaterWoman]

He asked, are you really autistic? When you indicated yes, he said, so am I. A human connection from one to another.

 

[Fino]

Sounds to me more like a child being a child. You tell a kid you don't want to be touched and that will be the first thing they do.

 

[Jumpinbare]

He asked, are you really autistic? When you indicated yes, he said, so am I. A human connection from one to another.

I guess maybe.

 

[Jumpinbare]

Sounds to me more like a child being a child. You tell a kid you don't want to be touched and that will be the first thing they do.

He touched the hem of the shirt sleeve, but not me. He was close enough, he could have easily touched my arm, or pressed on the sleeve to "touch" me through the sleeve, but he didn't. And he walked away calmly, not like a kid who had gotten away with something.

 

[MildredHubble]

Could have been tentatively trying to wind you up but perhaps didn't know what would happen/understood what Autism is. He may not have known whether you'd do nothing or turn green and shot-put him into the stratosphere. So he gently tested your boundaries and quit while he was ahead.

On a positive note, even though he tested your boundaries you maintained your composure.

 

[Jumpinbare]

On a positive note, even though he tested your boundaries you maintained your composure.

I kept expecting him to ask me something. The look on his face was as stereotypically questioning as you could get. It didn't seem like he was being mischievous. Of course, we're not the best at reading people's body language either.

 

[MildredHubble]

I kept expecting him to ask me something. The look on his face was as stereotypically questioning as you could get. It didn't seem like he was being mischievous. Of course, we're not the best at reading people's body language either.

It's of course possible that he was curious and as others have said, possibly autistic.

On the other hand, I've encountered quite a few people that looked very inquisitively at me while doing something unpleasant to me.

I guess we will never know what the motivation was

 

[Fino]

The classic "I'm not touching you" routine. Or maybe not understanding why it'd be wrong to touch you and wondering with awe, "What will happen if I touch him..." He also may have considered touching your sleeve as touching you. What a mystery it all is.

 

[Au Naturel]

Since nothing bad happened, I would not ascribe any ill intent to it. For me, that's all there is to know.

Can't read minds. He did what he did and why he did it doesn't matter.

 

[Misty Avich]

If the boy was autistic or had some other disorder like that, then it's not as creepy. But for anyone who knows what they're doing to just come up to you and touch your shirt is just weird.

 

[marc_101]

One of those mysteries.

Since I can only guess, my best guess that the kid was a funny teenager that was about to poke you and have a good laugh either at you or with you (in his head) but when he was about to he realized that you we were not being funny wearing that shirt; you really meant it.

Also, since we're playing guessing games, I'd say he is not autistic. An autistic person would mentally nod from far away and leave you alone

 

[Jumpinbare]

.

But doing that to a stranger in a parking lot is a little odd. Especially if he was alone and not trying to be cool in front of his friends. I don't know, no idea what he was doing.

There was a group of teens by the door of the store, but as I was backing my car, I looked over at the group and he was not among them.

 

[Tom]

Just another day in the life of a Fed.

 

[Jumpinbare]

View attachment 127347

Just another day in the life of a Fed.

When I was an Air Force officer, I guess I could have been considered a fed, if you stretched things a bit, but by that reasoning, I am at best an ex-fed.

 

[Tom]

When I was an Air Force officer, I guess I could have been considered a fed, if you stretched things a bit, but by that reasoning, I am at best an ex-fed.

A hotel owner had a problem with his guests. His hotel was built on a pier on the gulf coast and people were fishing out the windows and leaving a big mess despite a big sign in the room that said 'No FIshing From Rooms'. He discussed the problem with a local policeman who suggested he take the signs down. The owner did and the problem stopped.

I think there is a time for identifying, but mostly when needed, such as with family, close friends, medical personnal, a professor, a boss, etc.. General public identifying although it shouldn't be a problem, can be, as it may attract the cocky or malovent.

There are exceptions, one being if you are engaging in activism.

 

[Misty Avich]

Where I come from signs are put there as a way to avoid lawsuits. If you don't heed a sign then you can be held responsible for any accidents or danger to others. If a sign isn't there but rules are still in place then it's the company or business or council who are held responsible. So, for example, it is illegal in the UK to smoke inside public areas, so on every bus there are signs saying "no smoking", and if someone does smoke then the driver has a right to kick them off the bus. If there were no signs on a bus and someone smoked, even though everyone still knows it's against the law, then the bus company would be held responsible, even though the driver would still likely kick the smoker off the bus, as it's the law.

 

[WhitewaterWoman]

I guess maybe.

For some reason, what we now call level 2 and 3 autistics will approach me in community settings. That, plus 20 years of working with level 2 and 3, has given me a sense of what their communication is like. And this sounds very representative of some. (Obviously not all.)

I am honored when they approach me and risk that bit of human connection.

 

[Jumpinbare]

He asked, are you really autistic? When you indicated yes, he said, so am I. A human connection from one to another.

For some reason, what we now call level 2 and 3 autistics will approach me in community settings. That, plus 20 years of working with level 2 and 3, has given me a sense of what their communication is like. And this sounds very representative of some. (Obviously not all.)

I am honored when they approach me and risk that bit of human connection.

I wondered why you had seemed confident with the first statement. Now I see where you are coming from. I will consider myself honored.

 

[Neri]

One of those mysteries.

Since I can only guess, my best guess that the kid was a funny teenager that was about to poke you and have a good laugh either at you or with you (in his head) but when he was about to he realized that you we were not being funny wearing that shirt; you really meant it.

Also, since we're playing guessing games, I'd say he is not autistic. An autistic person would mentally nod from far away and leave you alone

Respectfully, autistic people can act all sorts of ways, not just one's that you'd expect. "If you've met one autistic person, you've met one autistic person".