Ok here goes..was I misdiagnosed or?

[maximus]

Hi there.
I have been lurking a little on several aspergers boards and discovered that theres things that I can identify with but also things that seem completely alien to me..

I have been reading up on the disorder,most common I see is social awkwardness/difficulties..I got this diagnosis in my mid teens but during,prior or after the evaluations I have not experienced any notable difficulties in interacting with people on a social level..I always went to parties,I generally speaking always have had girlfriends/female friends with benefits etc..I dont take things litterally all the time or miss social cues etc(well not that I have noticed anyway,or that have been made clear to me by others).

I did serve some years in the army as infantry,part of that time in combat and in a role where misunderstanding quick orders often put sarcastically would have put other people at severe risk..that never happened..and I don think anyone would put me in charge of other people in a high risk zone if they evaluated me as a risk to myself or others.

These are the traits in my personality and life wich I find directly contradictory to this diagnosis..I was not aware of the details /symptoms of this diagnosis and I have never given it any second tought since I got it,before now..

There are however things I do recognize myself in..especially the special interests where you learn everything about a topic and become sort of a "walking encyclopydia"
I have always been very interested in history and tend to obsess on several subjects that fall uner that category..to the point that I can recite dates and historical persons and events "in my sleep".

Weapons and military tactics wich often coincide with history and after a while the military itself as I went along serving in and as something I was very interested in.

Also other topics I get very obsessed with on a "revolving basis"..then they kinda peter out for a while until they get refreshed or I pick up a new topic.

After I quit active duty ,joined the reserves and became a civillian I starting a life with my fiance,that didnt work out much on account that we were very different individuals..also I started enjoying having time for myself to the point that I could go for a whole week without contacting any of my friends..I chalked that up to having spent so much time so close to other individuals that I maybe needed some alone time..
I also started to do some self medicating at times just to escape from reality.
I recently saw the movie "Mozart and the Wale" and as always I looked it up on imdb only to discover that people regarded that as an accurate portrayal of aspergers..
I couldnt identify with much the characters did in that flick.
I then started reading up on aspergers and that eventually lead me here..

I guess that is my life story in short almost..what do you think?..was I misdiagnosed as a kid or may I have a very mild case of this ..or have I been totally fooling myself all these years?

 

[aspirejohn]

Without waffling on too much, I'd just like to point you to this website:

http://www.disabledinfo.co.uk/dis/323-understanding-the-differences-between-aspergers-an.asp

 

[maximus]

Thanks for the reply but as I already mentioned ive been reading up a little on the disorder..and by a little I mean a LOT..thanks for your reply tough.

What I am looking for here i guess is some practical feedback..that is from someone that is living with this disorder in some shape or form either directly or indirectly..
But thank you anyway for taking time out of your day to police up that link..I dont think I have seen that particular one before.

Also..I didnt spellcheck my previous post ,nor check for grammar errors ,as I now see there are a few..my apologies for that as it was somewhat edited post haste.

 

[maximus]

Reading my initial post I realize maybe I should have made it more clear that I was given this diagnosis by professionals.(two psychatrists working in concert if memory serves)but I never found it relevant after that,not even in a high stress enviroment subject to instant change.
This evaluation was prompted by some misbehavior in school(getting into fights,stuff like that).

 

[jaws]

Not sure if this will help but you might look into Addictive Personality issues, OCD, PDD-NOS, ADD, and ADHD. The last three I have seen in various places to be considered forms of ASD similar to AS. The first two may be linked to psychological influences that are considered coping mechanisms. You might also be aware from your research, that since there is no one definitive test for AS, it has been postulated that someone could get five different diagnoses from five different therapists.

I have studied some psychology (electives, not major). I have also mentioned in other postings that I have noticed similarities between ASD and addicts, but there are also some distinct differences (when not dealing with an addictive aspie, which could blur those differences). While I'm not trying to give any type of suggestion that you are afflicted with any of these other issue, and I am not qualified to contradict a licensed professional...I'm just proposing other areas to consider in your self exploration.

A book I would recommend is "Addictive Thinking and the Addictive Personality" by Craig Nakken. This was recommenced to me by a professional therapist, when I was confronted with my partner's addiction. Over the years of researching both mine and his issues, I've been surprised by some of the similarities.

 

[maximus]

Thanks for the reply,yes I agree..five different shrinks can easily yield five different diagnoses..and I got mine in the late 90's when there was a surge of Aspergers and ADD/ADHD diagnoses ..
I have considered that some of my problems post military service may come from PTSD possibly..also I took an online test wich where linked to from a similar forum where the results came back as 9 out of 10 Neurotypical(out of 10 NT on one side and 10 AS on the other) but I do take online tests with a grain of salt..(also it could have been me subcounciously putting down the "right answers")

I do remember also some(elderly) shrink at a meeting with several shrinks + my mother when I had recieved the diagnosis,wich claimed to have known Dr.Asperger himself protesting rather loudly to the diagnosis..it all boiled down to the same team that evaluated me had a couple of sessions with my mother wich have insisted on the diagnosis since she found out about the details on the disorder..

As mentioned I never gave it any second tought after recieving it and had put it out of my mind upon entering the military where I didnt find it relevant..neither did the doctors that performed the psych evaluation at the MEPS center.(prior to boot camp).
If this disorder may have become somewhat overdiagnosed the last 15 years..I kinda find it disturbing in a way that doctors can be so "lazy" if you will..and it certainly must hurt the thousands living with this disorder for real when the floodgates have been opened for "fake aspies" wich got this diagnosis both unintentional or seeked it out intenionally to recieve benefits attached to it.

That being said,I do not know if I am a very mild case that by some extreme stroke of irony got "only the good parts" or if its as you mentioned coping mechanisms..some as a direct result of the psychic trauma of being in stressful situations(eg combat and the stress of being deployed to an active combat zone over time),or some as coping mechanisms from my childhood,or perhaps a mixture of all.

I will continue my personal research,and I have also asked my present therapist for a new evaluation..

and I do thank you for taking the time out of your day to reply (I will also look up that book you mentioned,I can most likely get my hands on it at my uni's library)

 

[Spinning Compass]

It sounds like you are very high functioning as am I. There are many people who, not knowing my history, would say that I couldn't possibly have Asperger's either. I don't relate to some of the movies I've seen about Asperger's/Autism either. I grew up in the Dark Ages where parents had a lot more control over how they disciplined their children, and I suspect the reason that I don't stim or do some of the other things I've heard about is that if I did, it would have been literally beat out of me. It was made very clear early on that such things weren't tolerated. Yes, there aspects of my upbringing that were pretty harsh by today's standards, but on the other hand, I am able to function pretty much as if I were normal.

I haven't gone for a formal diagnosis because I do not wish to get entangled with the mental health establishment again if I can help it. I have very bitter feelings about the way I was treated then. At any rate, why seek a label if you can get along all right on your own?

 

[maximus]

It sounds like you are very high functioning as am I. There are many people who, not knowing my history, would say that I couldn't possibly have Asperger's either. I don't relate to some of the movies I've seen about Asperger's/Autism either. I grew up in the Dark Ages where parents had a lot more control over how they disciplined their children, and I suspect the reason that I don't stim or do some of the other things I've heard about is that if I did, it would have been literally beat out of me. It was made very clear early on that such things weren't tolerated. Yes, there aspects of my upbringing that were pretty harsh by today's standards, but on the other hand, I am able to function pretty much as if I were normal.

I haven't gone for a formal diagnosis because I do not wish to get entangled with the mental health establishment again if I can help it. I have very bitter feelings about the way I was treated then. At any rate, why seek a label if you can get along all right on your own?

That makes sense...I come from a military family so I had a somewhat harsh upbringing myself..
Do you function normally in social settings if I may ask? I do myself...I tought this was one of the absolute halmmarks of Aspergers..well you live you learn..im up for a new evaluation soon,and as said they didnt note anything during my (brief) entry level military psych evaluation.
But then again the military is in dire need for personell these times..

I only wonder one thing,I held the rank of Sgt. E-5(OR-5 for NATO) and was in charge of my own fireteam at the time we were deployed overseas..could this work when you are high functional?(you HAVE to be able to read eachothers voices,body language etc etc..for obvious reasons)..

thanks for the reply

 

[jaws]

That makes sense...I come from a military family so I had a somewhat harsh upbringing myself..
Do you function normally in social settings if I may ask? I do myself...I tought this was one of the absolute halmmarks of Aspergers..well you live you learn..im up for a new evaluation soon,and as said they didnt note anything during my (brief) entry level military psych evaluation.
But then again the military is in dire need for personell these times..

I only wonder one thing,I held the rank of Sgt. E-5(OR-5 for NATO) and was in charge of my own fireteam at the time we were deployed overseas..could this work when you are high functional?(you HAVE to be able to read eachothers voices,body language etc etc..for obvious reasons)..

thanks for the reply

I can read many people and most situations and have held many leadership positions. I think that given the training AS can be an asset to certain leadership situations. The "lack of empathy" and "mind blindness" eliminates certain fuzzy situations allowing an aspie to base decisions on situational facts and prior training, without being overly concerned with feelings or outcomes. I've seen it noted that aspies make good EMT's and do well in the military because of the given rules and routines.

In researching I have quoted the above terms, as it is not an indication of being emotionless or uncaring...in fact aspies are generally regarded as having a high level or sympathy for others who are in situations we can recall going through ourselves.

I've attained my abilities through a lifetime of watching others (especially my father, who has mainly been in sales positions), practice, and formal education in management, public speaking, sales, psychology, etc. The main thing I've read is that aspies can learn to perform socially, but that we do it in a different and more deliberate way than NT's. For this reason, social interaction may be performed at near normal appearance, but leaves us completely drained and stressed out.

 

[psychedelica]

It would be possible you have AS or, PDD-NOS would be more likely then, right? (I'm far more AS than you but I have PDD-NOS, officially). But it seems unlikely. If what you said is everything, I would have tons of disorders, just mild cases. Can I ask why you got a diagnosis? Where there problems you were having that made you think you there was something 'wrong' with you? That might explain why you were diagnosed.

 

[Spinning Compass]

You asked if I functioned well in social situations. It depends on the situation and how long I am in it. I have gotten better over the years at faking it. But I am more comfortable in "scripted" situations where there are well-defined expectations, such as work, professional organizations, even the theater. As long as I am not asked to relate to people other than on a superficial basis I do all right. I do not do well in intimate settings (and I am not talking about sex). I need to keep people at arm's length because I have learned that if I don't they might see the unguarded "real" me and then they will either reject me or make fun of me or both. So that is the paradox. I can have friends as long as they are not close friends.

 

[Kit]

I can relate to what you are saying because I have also questioned my diagnoses in the past. I even almost went for a second opinion but I got talked out of it. I don't have good self awareness about myself so it be hard to take those tests I'd bet. I am more PDD-NOS than AS but was diagnosed with AS. My husband thinks I suck in social situations. I was not aware of the struggles I have. I always seem to do fine in it but then I realize I do struggle in them. I am shy for one and two I don't always know what to say or what I should say and how to say it. I also get nervous if I have to make a phone call or something. I can't stop worrying about being offensive or not.

You could be mild where your symptoms come and go.