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OK to socialise with boys?

M

Mozzie89

Well-Known Member
At university I just feel a bit more at ease talking to males, cause it can be easier to talk to. Often of evening socialisation, I'm happy to be the only female in a group of my male uni friends.

However do you think they may feel perhaps annoyed at a female hanger on if they wished for all male company and do I look too weird not joining the all female groups from classes?

I have noticed since it's academic university students they do talk about more intellectual things rather than laddish topics so maybe it's not a problem to mix the genders among more educated groups of people?
 
Mozzie89 said:
At university I just feel a bit more at ease talking to males, cause it can be easier to talk to. Often of evening socialisation, I'm happy to be the only female in a group of my male uni friends.

However do you think they may feel perhaps annoyed at a female hanger on if they wished for all male company and do I look too weird not joining the all female groups from classes?

I have noticed since it's academic university students they do talk about more intellectual things rather than laddish topics so maybe it's not a problem to mix the genders among more educated groups of people?
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and me with girls
like at school i can be social with girl then boys
 
I think its pretty common actually for someone on the spectrum to feel more comfortable when socializing with the opposite gender or the same gender, I don't really have that much issue as such but I seem to be talking to the guys alot since I was in a school full of boys, the population that are females are literally 20%.
 
I think it is okay and I also think it is common for a girl on the autistic spectrum... maybe because less emotional conversation. I don't know whether they would mind, i don't think so. However, with me, I only talk to girls at University because I feel tense around boys. I don't know why it is. I have trouble with a lot of aspects of the conversations the girls talk about though. Maybe boys would be easier.
 
Mozzie, plain and simple, for the most part guys will always like having girls hanging around. The one exception is if she is ruining the atmostphere (by going against the current group decision, like trying to play crazy 8's at poker night) As long as you are acting like one of the guys, they will never mind. In fact, they'll probably like having you around (gives them something to think about...)
 
Krazie243 said:
Mozzie, plain and simple, for the most part guys will always like having girls hanging around. The one exception is if she is ruining the atmostphere (by going against the current group decision, like trying to play crazy 8's at poker night) As long as you are acting like one of the guys, they will never mind. In fact, they'll probably like having you around (gives them something to think about...)
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Thanks a lot. Tbh looking back, I should have made more of an effort (or perhaps I've only learnt these things recently, us Aspies being later developers) to have made friends with these particular males, purely out of Platonic interest earlier on then it would have been more normal and expected for me to hang out socially with them, rather than as I did towards the end of term tagging along with them, as I felt like I was doing. Anyway at least I've learnt so won't make mistakes again. :)

And of course as you said, heterosexual males enjoy female company anyway lol ;)
 
And of course as you said, heterosexual males enjoy female company anyway lol ;)
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Yes we do... lol. We males have that unfortunate weakness for women that is easily exploited. We'll gladly let you be a part of our group if you aren't making a mess of it =)
 
Most of the new friends that I've made at sixth form are boys. There are a few girls I go round with, especially a girl who is in two of my classes. I'm comfortable around her, which is good, and she's very funny, but I wouldn't want to be a really good friend of hers or anything.
Tonight I'm going out (she says casually) with a group which is practically all boys. If it was all girls I'd probably be calling to cancel right now. I'm happy because my friends (well, the people I spent time with) at secondary school were more girls and it's just so much easier without them...

My parents have always been weird about it. If I went to the cinema with a boy they'd insist on meeting him first, so often I cancelled. And then they said "you should have more friends! you should socialise more!". Hmph. They are straightlaced and Christian so I forgive them slightly for their oversight...the very obvious oversight, that I don't 'fancy' my friends just because they are boys and I am a girl!
 
superboyian said:
I think its pretty common actually for someone on the spectrum to feel more comfortable when socializing with the opposite gender or the same gender, I don't really have that much issue as such but I seem to be talking to the guys alot since I was in a school full of boys, the population that are females are literally 20%.
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True. I think the reason for this is that we may find typical, popular or "with it" members of the same sex rather intimidating, for example if your a girl u may find you dont "click" with girls that want to do nothing but talk about clothes, sex, shopping and all that marlarky that girls talk about so you feel safer with boys that dont expect that. Me being an aspie male i have to admit i find it easier talking to girls because typical blokes expect me to be into football, formula 1 and going clubbing all the time. Theres not as much pressure to blend with the oposite sex. Anyone see my point?
 
I also find it easier to talk to boys than girls, girls can be so bitchy sometimes. Girls in my class used to make a big deal of it if they saw me talking to a boy, they used to say,
"OMG you like TOTALLY fancy him, you should go out, etc.", but I can be friends with a boy without needing to stick my tongue down his throat.
 
Nerd by Default said:
True. I think the reason for this is that we may find typical, popular or "with it" members of the same sex rather intimidating, for example if your a girl u may find you dont "click" with girls that want to do nothing but talk about clothes, sex, shopping and all that marlarky that girls talk about so you feel safer with boys that dont expect that. Me being an aspie male i have to admit i find it easier talking to girls because typical blokes expect me to be into football, formula 1 and going clubbing all the time. Theres not as much pressure to blend with the oposite sex. Anyone see my point?
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that is exactly how i feel about it, as a girl it is very hard for me to meet the expectations of the girls around me
 
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