Part of a team

[Neia]

I always dreamt of being part of a tight-knit group of friends. My ideal was the old 70s tv show The Famous Five, four kids and a dog.
In my mind, that was perfection.

Of course, I was never able to fit in, so that sense of belonging was never realised. Even in my family I was the odd one out.
There were some others that, I now suspect, were/are also on The Spectrum. But they got a pass because one wasn't supposed to live past puberty (fortunately still very much alive), another drank himself to death and was coddled so his drinking didn't get any worse... but I was too normal I guess. So more was demanded of me, and not very much forgiven.

I still sort of crave for that sense of belonging to a team, a tight-knit group of friends.

When I buy a game I think of how wonderful it would be to play it with friends. But I'm still the odd one out.
Amongst my friends, I'm the only one who remains single and is not a mother. But even if any of them were also single with no children, they'd be going out dancing, or to pubs, or other stuff like that. They'd not be interested in playing computer/board games, hiking, collecting rocks, observing nature, ...

So, I'd still be the odd one out.

I guess all that remains for me on this Earth is writing the adventures I dreamt of in childhood.
I'm glad I have an imagination.
But it still sucks!

 

[Outdated]

I still sort of crave for that sense of belonging to a team, a tight-knit group of friends.

I never did. Even as a little kid I was quite happy playing by myself and I didn't need others around me.

But even if any of them were also single with no children, they'd be going out dancing, or to pubs, or other stuff like that.

For me this was the opposite. All my friends settled down to have families and I was the party boy in to my early 40s.

There was only really a couple of times that I felt like I was part of a community, not in a tightly knit group of friends but as a valued member of the community. Both times it was because of computer knowledge. I started getting in to computers big time in 96, when everyone was starting to get on the net.

I upgraded and rebuilt my computer several times and I started doing the same for people I knew. Everyone's computers had to be upgraded back then if they wanted to go on the net and see streaming video, they needed the new processor with MMX capabilities.

So as a social thing I upgraded everyone's computers for them, all they had to do was pay for parts and shout me a couple of beers. I had a lot of fun doing this and it made me very popular. I also ended up with a whole heap of working computer parts, outdated but still in good condition.

So I went to second hand computer markets and I'd buy a case to put parts in, and a screen and keyboard and mouse to go with it, and assemble computers. I loaded them up with Windows and Office and a few games and gave them to single parent families that couldn't afford a computer. I was earning a heap of money at the time and I never really cared much about money, I can always get more when I need it.

It was a similar situation when I moved out in to the bush. That's the only times in my life that I felt that people valued me.

 

[Neia]

I never did. Even as a little kid I was quite happy playing by myself and I didn't need others around me.

It's sort of funny really. I guess.

I loved playing by myself, being in my own private world where bullies (of any age) never got their way, where I had my imaginary friends (even if I knew they weren't real) and did belong and no one rejected me.
It was like living inside one of my books.

I wanted to be alone, but dreamt of having friends. But, looking back, I think I was very pragmatic. I knew I was not like the others, and accepted that. It was a fact of life for me, so I resigned myself to it.

Sort of.

 

[Shamar]

I always dreamt of being part of a tight-knit group of friends. My ideal was the old 70s tv show The Famous Five, four kids and a dog.
In my mind, that was perfection.

I still sort of crave for that sense of belonging to a team, a tight-knit group of friends.

I understand exactly what you mean. I have always wanted to be part of a group, a team of people working together, to have friends, or even A friend. But I understand now that can never happen. I still crave it though.

 

[VictorR]

playing computer/board games, hiking, collecting rocks, observing nature

There are some AS / ND groups in my area that do exactly those things.

Perhaps if there aren't such groups in your area, you could start one?

 

[Neia]

There are some AS / ND groups in my area that do exactly those things.

Perhaps if there aren't such groups in your area, you could start one?

I'm more the person who sometimes wonders about something, tells others, and they run with it. My extreme anxiety would keep me from starting a group like that.

 

[VictorR]

I'm more the person who sometimes wonders about something, tells others, and they run with it. My extreme anxiety would keep me from starting a group like that.

Maybe you could see if there are related groups in your area, and tell them about the things you're interested in, and to let you know if/when they do have those sorts of activities.

Sometimes organizers are willing to experiment with events if they know they can bring in some folks who aren't interested in their current offerings.