People Don't Deliver The Things They Say To People

[The Penguin]

I learned with most people I interact with in my life, they normally don't deliver the things they say. They can promise something but at last minute always back out. Mind you, I understand sometimes there can be something that happen giving the person a reason to not to deliver their promise. However, if this is an ongoing thing, then this is something does gets me really upset. Of course I have no control of the person actions. I think some people might say something to make a person to feel better but not truly mean it. The person might not realize they have a habit of doing this and might not realize how this can effect a person.

Me as a person, I do deliver the things I say to people most of the time. I wish more people can do the same but I think I'm asking too much from society.

 

[Suzanne]

I am like you, The Penguin. Because I have been let down SO MUCH, I mean it when I say it and often get thanks for keeping my word.

The first time it happened to me, I was shocked and it caused a snowball effect.

Because I take things so literally, I have been left disappointed on so many occasions that it has left me feeling angry.

I now do not trust anyone. I have had some wonderful acknowledgement and think: at last and then, it doesn't happen.

I guess it is as you have said: people want to make you feel better and so, throw out lovely suggestions, but we tend to take them literally and well it is "written" in ink to us and the memory stays around.

One positive thing that comes from all this rubbish is that I do not EVER want to be guilty of the same thing, so in a sense, I am taking something from severe negativity ( as you are doing) and turning it into something positive.

I am bitter and full of resentment; but there is still a huge part of me that is not sunk so low that I cannot rise above things and I will not become what I hate!

 

[Bolletje]

I'm one of those people that often fails to deliver. I want to be helpful and want to make people feel good, so I offer my help and advice liberally, but I often forget to consider the practicality beforehand. Even worse when I've been drinking because I'll make plans with everyone at that point.

I think part of it is trained behavior. I've learned that it's considered friendly to offer your help, but I've also experienced that most people will not take you up on your offer, or cancel plans. I think that combination is what causes most unfortunate situations in which someone does want my help but I'm forced to backtrack because I don't have the time or I'm anxious to go out.

 

[LittleLemon]

I used to be so trusting of people, but like you Suzanne, I've been let down too many times. Now when people offer to help out or simply suggest we get together 'sometime', I get so confused and not sure how to take it. Do they really mean it or not?

 

[toothless]

im like you penguin,ill always give what i say even if it affects my mental health but but i get let down time and time again with promises or actions i am so fed up of it.
i have no trust of support staff it takes me a while to work out if theyre honest and will do what they say,same with any group of people but im around support staff the most.

i hate it when a favoured support staff or manager is leaving the company and she/he says,dont worry i will come and visit you i wont be like those who say they will come but never do, and you know? they have never contacted about visiting.
i honestly dont think people care.

 

[The Penguin]

i honestly dont think people care.

I have witness with many people I meet in my life if they have access to many people, they don't have to care if they drop a person if it easy for them to find someone else. I don't find it right there people out there that is like this. When I learn this person have this type of character, I will just drop that person as I don't want someone like that in my life.

 

[OkRad]

I have witness with many people I meet in my life if they have access to many people, they don't have to care if they drop a person if it easy for them to find someone else. I don't find it right there people out there that is like this. When I learn this person have this type of character, I will just drop that person as I don't want someone like that in my life.

Sadly I am in that now. A friend of 15 years has gotten on meds and found new friends. He is Aspie and we always had a deep friendship, but after my accident, he is dropping me. I am panicking a lot. Not doing anything about it, because I am PDD and Autie. So it is just mental agony becaues I cannot undersand it and he will not talk.

Once in a while he emails me. I will never say to him not to because I have zero friends, no one in my life. I am so sad about it, if I COULD cut it off I would. But I cannot. People say stay strong, but THEY have other supports.

We are not and never were intimate. So there is not that added burden, thank God. Still, my not being able to move on and his toying with me hurts and will till I die .