People think you might be able to change your Aspergers (?)

[NeverEnder]

We have all heard of these ideas before: Altering, changing, ending, curing your Aspergers.

While this may not be 100% incorrect, NTs, including Doctors/Therapists, do not get it, I believe.

Really, on a more personal note, I have been gently questioned about my Aspergers by a concerned person in my life:

"Do you accept your Aspergers? Wouldn't you like to change it if you could?" This was meant with good intentions, I know, but...

Honestly, I am just settling into my Aspergers (diagnosed a year and a half ago). I am accepting it for what it is.

Does it make me different? No, I have always been "different". Always. Now I just know a major part of the reason why I have always been considered different.

People have said to me: "You people with Aspergers just won't let it go. You think you are special, better because of it."

Yes, in some ways I do. If my choice was to view/live life as an NT I would decline the offer.

 

[epath13]

I would definitely not like to change... I want to adapt better but despite of all the troubles I love uniqueness of my brain. I LOVE being different, strange, standing out of the crowd...it's one of the best qualities you could ever wish for! well at least that's my opinion and one more thing - I think people like us can potentially help others to discover their uniqueness ...not sure how and why...I just had a picture in my mind and described it in this statement

 

[Occasional_Demon]

I've had people say to me that it's possible to "grow out" of ASD, and that all you need is willpower. All I could do was facepalm because that's not how ASD works. It's not an immature trait, it's not a personality trait - it's something that you are born with, and it's how your brain is wired. I can't jedi mind-trick ASD away; it's a bit like trying to change my hair colour through "willpower", or changing my height.

I'm okay with being an Aspie. If I was offered a "cure", I don't know if people can guarantee that some of the strengths will vanish if Asperger's was taken out of the equation. So, I'm happy to be who I am.

 

[kasmanaft08]

#Tag: Things that bother you

So basically, with Aspberger's, it's a condition that means there's something wrong with me not because I harm anyone through it, but because it's not normal to some abstact standard.

In fact, the only time it's harmful towards myself is when said standard is working deliberately against you/conditioning you to be normal, something I consider to be both stressful and depressing, or you have some other condition (that, mind you, is not Aspberger's) that's causing some problems. I still opt that Aspberger's is nothing more than a different neurological wiring, and nothing more, with a same mix of healthy/unhealthy, good/bad people like any other personality.

People are too focused on the word normal, whether they realize it or not.

I think it's interesting that no one considers that maybe they should change: maybe stop being closed-minded assholes? Maybe... if I'm not harming anyone or myself, mind your own business? Just a thought.

 

[AshleyT]

Nothing angers me more than when i see famous doctors claiming they can 'cure' autism.

They don't seem to understand that the patients are not cured - they have learnt entirely how to fit in.

That's a lot of pressure for a person to have to have their whole life - having to fit in, having to wear a mask all the time.

 

[Arashi222]

I completely agree with what most everyone said so far in this thread. I mean would I change what i know now rather than when I was little? No. Would I change my challenges in my life because of the AS? No I wouldn't why? because it is who I am. If I didn't have AS, if I didn't have a visual impairment I wouldn't be me. So yah I guess it does make me a little upset when people label it as a disability or that it can be cured like its a fungus or something that we need to shake off and grow out of and be "normal" eh "normal is overrated" i wouldn't change any of us we are who we are because of how we got to this point AS included.

Occasional_Demon: wouldn't it be nice though to change our hair color by just thinking about it? or our height? But even with saying that we would always still be us and still in the end revert back to what we were right?

 

[Droopy]

I would like to change the poor social/communication skills part of it but I would leave everything else as is. Whilst it can't be "cured" people on the spectrum can learn to adapt, develop skills and suppress the "bad/annoying" side of it. This may take much practice, learning and time but I think that it can happen. However, I acknowledge that not everyone on the spectrum wants to have social relationships/friends and stuff like that - which is fine - I was like that too for most of my life.

 

[earthsteward70]

I would n't change who I am. I know that I am as good as everyone else. Noone is better than me. However, I am glad I know now about my Asperger's and that as far as people wanting to change/cure me that those are not the type of people I want to surround myself with. I want friends, doctors, even my future partner to get me, love me how I am, and be a positive presence in my life, because I know that if there is any changing it is me who will want it, and me who will make it.

 

[Bay]

I haven't come across anyone in the "find a cure" camp. Although I am new to this, I think I support research to better understand autism but...I personally wouldn't want to be cured of it. I would rather the rest of the world understand it better, is all. I actually like the way that I am wired, and understanding Asperger Syndrome has made it easier to interact with NTs because now I know where the disconnect is, and why. I think that there are probably idiots in all areas of life and it is only a matter of time before I encounter one of the cure/change variety. If nothing else I feel confident in my ability to recognize an idiot when I see one. Harsh? Maybe. But if I can't call 'em as I see 'em here then I can't do it anywhere.

 

[Alpaca]

What's normal to begin with? People need to take a step back and look around for a change. 1 in 150 is technically a sociopath. We have schizophrenics, alcoholics, drug abusers, Narcissists, bigots, nymphos, cho mos, depressives, anti-progressives, etc etc. The list goes on. Not that everyone is bad, but most people have some sort of something going on. Saying that we are not normal because of how WE are is such an incorrect assertions of life in general.

A lot of times I feel like I'm normal and the worlds crazy.

As for changing my condition, I was conducting my own sort of behavioral programming long before I ever was diagnosed. I've taken repeated steps to improve upon myself in anyway that was hindering my progress. Making sure I don't interrupt people, or ramble about Neuro-theorem or reason why you might sometimes see Aurora Borealis in places where it don't belong.

I'm not going to change who I am, but I'm willing to meet people in the middle. I'll accept them for who they are if they accept me for who I am.