Pet Peeve: Verbal repetition

[Mindf'Elle'ness]

I've become quite irritated and vocal in my middle years at people who tell the same dang stories over and over again. It's like they enjoy telling the story so much that they're repeating it over and over again. I have started to be more vocal and ask them, "Do you realize you tell me this story every time I see you?", or "Do you realize that you've already told me this like 5 times?". Sometimes I get a giggle, sometimes they then add on something that really isn't relevant just to make it seem like it's not EXACTLY the same story. This guy I'm dating now, his whole conversation sounds like a copy/paste of the last time we spent four hours together.
What does this mean? How can they not remember that 3 days ago they told me this exact same story? My mother in law would say she's only making conversation.
It drives me insane. Like I want to gouge my eyes out. Or my ears.

Have you ever been told that you repeat yourself A LOT?

Oh, and it seems to be the especially chatty people (people who have the gift of gab) who are the most guilty!

 

[Judge]

I suspect most people are irritated by it. Repetitious sentences and entire stories.

However one thing to consider is that it's not all that uncommon for the elderly to do such a thing. Particularly if they have conditions like dementia, as did my mother. If so, be patient with them.

After all, "Every day you get older. Now that's a law!" -Paul Newman, "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid"

Repetition in people with dementia - SCIE

 

[Aspychata]

I notice if l am stressed, l repeat stuff, and l stim. If not stressed, then no worries.

 

[Raggamuffin]

My parents have been telling me the same stories every time I speak to them for years.

For a long time I found it infuriating. Now I actually quite enjoy it. It's sort of amusing in a weird way.

Ed

 

[Progster]

Have you ever been told that you repeat yourself A LOT?

I tend to over-explain, or over-elaborate I sometimes have a persistent thought that I repeat a lot and I get back, "You've said that one hundred times today already!"

Oh, and it seems to be the especially chatty people (people who have the gift of gab) who are the most guilty!

This kind of person tends to think out loud, so if they have a persistent or recurrent thought, they are more likely to repeat it.

 

[onlything]

Isn't it part of small talk? Always the same and never with any kind of relevance?

I don't find it too annoying, honestly, since I'm rarely interested in stories other people tell. They all sound the same, even if different people tell them. But then, it's maybe because I find very few things interesting in general, a leftover from my last depression episode.

It's quite amusing how my parents like to tell the same exact stories about my brother every time we see each other. It used to frustrate me more than annoy me when I was young - I liked the stories but I disliked the fact that there were none to be told abound me. Simple jealousy, I suppose. I quite accepted the fact that you can't really have stories to tell about an easily forgettable child I used to be.

 

[Alexej]

I tend to over-explain, or over-elaborate

YEs I recognise this one and do this myself

This kind of person tends to think out loud

This often alloys me, since the person takes up all the verbal space thinking something through and I find that this curtails my ability to process and think things thought - which I tend to do silently and interiorly.

 

[Progster]

This often alloys me, since the person takes up all the verbal space thinking something through and I find that this curtails my ability to process and think things thought - which I tend to do silently and interiorly.

Same here - it creates a kind of pressure on the brain that I have to get away from.

 

[Mary Terry]

I have a childhood friend who I now believe is an histrionic. She never shuts up, never asks me how I'm doing, has no genuine interest in my life, and retells the same, boring stories over and over. It is her way of dominating every conversation and getting attention for herself. Her particular style is self-deprecating humor, which, after 50 years of listening to her, is not funny to me, but strangers and people who don't know her well will sit enthralled, listening to her claptrap and laughing. I mostly avoid her now because I don't want to be rude to her.

 

[Judge]

I have a childhood friend who I now believe is an histrionic. She never shuts up, never asks me how I'm doing, has no genuine interest in my life, and retells the same, boring stories over and over. It is her way of dominating every conversation and getting attention for herself. Her particular style is self-deprecating humor, which, after 50 years of listening to her, is not funny to me, but strangers and people who don't know her well will sit enthralled, listening to her claptrap and laughing. I mostly avoid her now because I don't want to be rude to her.

Emotional "vampires" that one inevitably must run away from. Yeah, I've met one before who I was convinced had Histrionic Personality Disorder. Where everything was a crisis for them...like the Robinson Robot on steroids.

 

[AngelaS267]

I do this. A lot of people do this, and I'm sure it's not malicious or to irritate you, so maybe try to understand that. Sometimes the person may forget that they told it. Or maybe the story can provide incite for numerous situations. Or maybe they're on the spectrum too and have a habit of repeating stories because they love that story a lot and thats what they have to offer...

 

[SDRSpark]

I do this. A lot of people do this, and I'm sure it's not malicious or to irritate you, so maybe try to understand that. Sometimes the person may forget that they told it. Or maybe the story can provide incite for numerous situations. Or maybe they're on the spectrum too and have a habit of repeating stories because they love that story a lot and thats what they have to offer...

This!

Although, despite being someone who does this, I also get annoyed when other people do it. Go figure. *facepalm*

 

[Misery]

Memory just works this way sometimes.

I often cant remember something I said 5 minutes ago, let alone 3 days ago. For some people, it's just how it is.

 

[Mindf'Elle'ness]

Memory just works this way sometimes.

I often cant remember something I said 5 minutes ago, let alone 3 days ago. For some people, it's just how it is.

How do you feel if someone reminds you that you are repeating yourself? You're not that old (???), so I'm guessing your forgetfulness isn't age related. Do you think it's rude? Funny?
Edited to re-word: I meant, when people remind you do you think the situation is amusing or that they are being rude? Maybe you understood me anyway. I re-read what I had written and it sounded quite different than what I had intended

 

[Misery]

How do you feel if someone reminds you that you are repeating yourself? You're not that old (???), so I'm guessing your forgetfulness isn't age related. Do you think it's rude? Funny?

Aye, I'm far from reaching the ranks of the elderly. I've just always been this way.

It's always been troublesome to a degree. Particularly back in school. "I forgot" was never acceptable to everyone else when it came to homework (neither was "it's a pointless waste of time anyway" unfortunately) or things like that. Having memory issues is just frustrating overall.

When it comes to repeating in conversation though, ehhh... doesnt happen hugely often as I really just dont talk much. Most of the people around me just want to talk about things like sports or politics.... aka, things I utterly refuse to engage with.... so I tend to just avoid conversation. But on the off-chance that I see a need to explain something, it's often "yeah you already told me about it yesterday". And it's like.... how am I supposed to know that? I once made a sandwich and forgot the bread, you think I'm going to remember yesterday's conversation?

I suppose if I was more talkative and thus the comments came more often it would likely get on my nerves real fast. I'm not exactly very patient.

What does cause frustration though is others getting frustrated because they have to repeat something to me. "I just told you 5 hours ago!" they say, and it's like.... what am I supposed to do about it? I cant just fix it, no need to get so angry....

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Then you wouldn't like me. That's part of my autism. I say a lot of the same things over and over again every time I see the person. I can't help it. And I just recently realized I do it. I'm almost 40. So you can complain all you like, but it's just the way some of us are wired. Besides, that was a fun story right?

 

[Ylva]

It's like the movie Groundhog Day. But I am sure I do it to people sometimes as well, because sometimes I'll have an epiphany and tell someone about it, only to realize I had that same epiphany months ago and told them then.

 

[Ken S.]

Never seen a peeve before, let alone had one as a pet. Can they be paper trained?

 

[tree]

 

[Ken S.]

@tree Looks like you've had it on a diet of straight envy.