Phone calls

[scleod]

Does any one else struggle with phone calls?

So little context.
It is not just any phone call. It is phone calls of substantial matter. Dr app, massage etc.

I was in a car accident in November, hit from behind while stopped at a red light. This means I have to call my insurance company because i have to start a bodily claim; I have a concussion, whiplash, migraines and major jaw pain and damage. I have 2 years to do this. BUT here is the kicker, I just found out that I only get dental coverage for 3 months. My jaw was shifted a half inch out of place. Every time I think about calling Im like oh I have time. Then I think of the pain then I think I should call then I think of how long it will take then I think of repeating the story of what happened again then I think of all the moving part then I think of everything over and over and over again and send myself into such a tizzy I cant even move and just rock for hours. And thus here we are. The pain is keeping me up at nigjt I cant eat properly cause I cant chew cause my jaw hurts so much.

Umm advice anyone? Or does anyone else get this hapoening to them with simple ridiculous stupid phone calls? I could make them for my husband but not me.

 

[Jumpinbare]

I didn't know I was autistic till a year ago. When I needed to make a call, I'd give myself a day or two, then I'd grit my teeth and Git R Done. I was pretty harsh with myself about "weaknesses".

 

[SusanLR]

Phone calls have always been difficult for me.
I let calls go to voice mail, then decide when to return the call, or if it is something I need to return at all.

I also think I have time and procrastinate making phone calls.
There's just something about making that call. I try to limit them to one call per day.
Glad for days there are none.
I don't use a smartphone. Simple talk and text.

I believe the phone call dislike is in the same league as the difficulties many of us have with eye contact and socializing in general.
They are all making a connection with others and that feels awkward most of the time for me.

 

[kriss72]

Does any one else struggle with phone calls?

Yes, they are challenging, I usually either try to practice my "speach" beforehand, like if making an appointment where I can predict the flow of the call - or I go very open about I have no idea of what I'm doing, starting with I hope it is the right number I called, I'm trying to ....

About your insurance claim, is there a possibility to do it in writing, or have someone else call on your behalf, maybe with you next to them?

 

[scleod]

Thank you everyone I am loving every minite of this. The responses are so real it makes me excited to read them. Keep em coming

 

[scleod]

Yes, they are challenging, I usually either try to practice my "speach" beforehand, like if making an appointment where I can predict the flow of the call - or I go very open about I have no idea of what I'm doing, starting with I hope it is the right number I called, I'm trying to ....

About your insurance claim, is there a possibility to do it in writing, or have someone else call on your behalf, maybe with you next to them?

I unfortunately cant do it in writing. Just would make things to easy for me lol.
That's a good idea, I think I am going to try to build up the courage to ask my husband to call with me. It is easier with him. Everything is easier with him. And he gladly assists me.

 

[kriss72]

I unfortunately cant do it in writing. Just would make things to easy for me lol.
That's a good idea, I think I am going to try to build up the courage to ask my husband to call with me. It is easier with him. Everything is easier with him. And he gladly assists me.

Sounds like a good plan - I sometimes use my JJ in that way, like if we need to talk to someone in a shop, or at the reception in the hospital, it's very hard for me to go there to ask, but JJ can initiate it, and then I can supplement.

 

[scleod]

Sounds like a good plan - I sometimes use my JJ in that way, like if we need to talk to someone in a shop, or at the reception in the hospital, it's very hard for me to go there to ask, but JJ can initiate it, and then I can supplement.

For some reason Ifeel less than because of this. I did not used to struggle so pootly with this. But I guess I woild push myself so hard I would get physically ill. It has also been increaseingly hard to control since the yet anothe brain injury. My 11th diagnosed to be more specifiic

 

[kriss72]

For some reason Ifeel less than because of this. I did not used to struggle so pootly with this. But I guess I woild push myself so hard I would get physically ill. It has also been increaseingly hard to control since the yet anothe brain injury. My 11th diagnosed to be more specifiic

Sorry to hear about your brain injuries, sounds bad, feel free to share what happend to you, if you want to.

I know it's easy to say, hard to do, but I don't think we should feel less than because life have made some things difficult for us - if I'm having a difficult time e.g. shopping I try to think, hey, Kriss, you are actually in this shop, that is an accomplishment you can be proud of.

Asking for help is a sign of strength not weakness pushing your self beyond your limit is not helping anyone, it's ok to push one self to the limit if it has a purpose, but not above it IMHO.

 

[marc_101]

Yes. I still don't like them. I don't like to attribute everything to a diagnosis, though. I especially hated making calls in English when my English was not great because you can't use hands or other ways of communication. But I don't enjoy them much in my native language either.

One recommendation that helps me: You're most likely talking to a stranger. A person who doesn't know you, to whom you don't owe them anything. They are not going to think about you that hard. You could also say stuff like: "Sorry, I had a concussion [most people are familiar with concussions], be patient and speak slowly because I won't be able to understand you." Most people want to be nice to others when they understand them.

 

[WhitewaterWoman]

In general I don't like phone calls. Strangely enough, I worked for more than 20 years in a field that required me to make lots of and lots of phone calls. I developed a pattern for making these calls and that worked pretty well. Of course difficult situations caused increased anxiety.

A wise man told me that I should reserve the difficult tasks for the morning when I am more alert. I have done this and it does help. Of course the time of day might be different for different people, whenever you are feeling the most alert and capable.

The trouble with calling the insurance company is that you don't know what the key words are. In every organization I have dealt with, there are key words to use to get what you want. If you don't know the key words, it makes the phone call more difficult.

I might suggest that you write out what you want to say and the important points you want to make to be sure of getting your information across. I still do that for important calls or appointments.

It sounds like your main concern right now is with your jaw and whether or not insurance will cover what you need after 3 months. So I would suggest calling and just saying that. ("My main concern is xyz problems with my jaw and if insurance will cover it after three months.")

Do not be afraid to interupt the person you are calling to bring the conversation back to your main point. I have been known to say things like "This is my main concern and you haven't aswered my question yet. I am not satisfied with this call and want the information or please connect me to your supervisor." Repeat ad nauseum until you get what you need.

All that said and depending on where you live and what kind of health insurance you have, I believe that your regular health insurance will kick in if your car insurance gives out. (I have been in a couple of car accidents and that is what I remember happening.)

 

[Kisa the tea]

I don't like phone calls at all. I much prefer texting or instant messages.

 

[Outdated]

Thank you everyone I am loving every minite of this. The responses are so real it makes me excited to read them. Keep em coming

I have hated phones all my life. I've tried many times to rationalise it but never came up with anything definitive.

I go to extremes to avoid making phone calls. I much prefer to talk to people face to face, and video calls are no better. I'm very sensitive to people's body language and moods and this makes up a lot of information that I use to help me understand what people are saying. In a phone call most of that information is missing.

I used to get funny reactions from people when applying for jobs many years ago. I'd take the phone number and then scroll through the yellow pages of the phone book until I found the business address, then instead of phoning I'd walk through the front door and introduce myself. Most were impressed by this but some were suspicious.

I do the same sort of things today as well, and I hate smart phones even more than I hated the old landline. I rarely take my phone with me when I go out, it remains plugged in to the back of my computer. I hate text messages because I have to go looking for my other glasses so that I can read the messages, and compared to using a keyboard I find replying to texts extremely awkward and unintuitive.

And I hate being "on call" all the time. If the phone rings and I don't feel like answering it then I don't bother. I miss the days before mobile phones. If someone wanted to talk to you they'd come and knock on your door, and that was too much trouble unless they thought it was important.

 

[scleod]

Yes, they are challenging, I usually either try to practice my "speach" beforehand, like if making an appointment where I can predict the flow of the call - or I go very open about I have no idea of what I'm doing, starting with I hope it is the right number I called, I'm trying to ....

About your insurance claim, is there a possibility to do it in writing, or have someone else call on your behalf, maybe with you next to them?

Thankfully I was able to submit it via an app. I could bare to call. I tried 3 times and hung up but my jaw is all swollen, hot, burning and feeling it if place from the crash so I am gonna have to go see a dentist, which I did make that call!! Yay

 

[scleod]

Sorry to hear about your brain injuries, sounds bad, feel free to share what happend to you, if you want to.

I know it's easy to say, hard to do, but I don't think we should feel less than because life have made some things difficult for us - if I'm having a difficult time e.g. shopping I try to think, hey, Kriss, you are actually in this shop, that is an accomplishment you can be proud of.

Asking for help is a sign of strength not weakness pushing your self beyond your limit is not helping anyone, it's ok to push one self to the limit if it has a purpose, but not above it IMHO.

That is very true. Thank you for that kind advice. We all need to be a little more gentle on ourselves.
As for the concussions I may share one day. They are quite traumatic stories not necessarily for me but for others reading. But it may be cathartic..

 

[kriss72]

Thankfully I was able to submit it via an app. I could bare to call. I tried 3 times and hung up but my jaw is all swollen, hot, burning and feeling it if place from the crash so I am gonna have to go see a dentist, which I did make that call!! Yay

I'm happy to hear you were able to do it through an app and good you could call the dentist, I sometimes do a little happy dance after making a difficult call, but I guess that could be painful to you due to the injury.

 

[scleod]

In general I don't like phone calls. Strangely enough, I worked for more than 20 years in a field that required me to make lots of and lots of phone calls. I developed a pattern for making these calls and that worked pretty well. Of course difficult situations caused increased anxiety.

A wise man told me that I should reserve the difficult tasks for the morning when I am more alert. I have done this and it does help. Of course the time of day might be different for different people, whenever you are feeling the most alert and capable.

The trouble with calling the insurance company is that you don't know what the key words are. In every organization I have dealt with, there are key words to use to get what you want. If you don't know the key words, it makes the phone call more difficult.

I might suggest that you write out what you want to say and the important points you want to make to be sure of getting your information across. I still do that for important calls or appointments.

It sounds like your main concern right now is with your jaw and whether or not insurance will cover what you need after 3 months. So I would suggest calling and just saying that. ("My main concern is xyz problems with my jaw and if insurance will cover it after three months.")

Do not be afraid to interupt the person you are calling to bring the conversation back to your main point. I have been known to say things like "This is my main concern and you haven't aswered my question yet. I am not satisfied with this call and want the information or please connect me to your supervisor." Repeat ad nauseum until you get what you need.

All that said and depending on where you live and what kind of health insurance you have, I believe that your regular health insurance will kick in if your car insurance gives out. (I have been in a couple of car accidents and that is what

That is very good advice. I may have to list to that advie and even wright that that down 'go back to the jaw point, ask to speak to supervisor if off topic' becuase I will eventually have to talk to a claim rep.

I also had a work place injury and fractured my foot and have to deal with a work place rep so I can use the same strategy