• Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Private Member only forums for more serious discussions that you may wish to not have guests or search engines access to.
    • Your very own blog. Write about anything you like on your own individual blog.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral

potential date in CT

paloftoon

paloftoon

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
I'm near Philly and I did a short video chat with someone in a rural or small town of CT near Waterbury.

He seems interested in me.

He seems to like how I look.

He's got a 'typical' mainstream race look that I like a lot. I have a lot to offer (respectable job, own place), but I know that a lot of people don't like my "exotic" look. I think I very recently got a superb haircut, and for only $8!

He likes outdoor things and I like indoor things more. I hope he's open to doing things that I like and I would definitely try to be open to things he likes. I'm okay with traveling if there seems like there would be enough reciprocation.
 
Go for it!

Your first dates should always be about getting to kniw one another. To that end, don't hold back who you are. Don't try to be pleasing to him, just be yourself without appology and give him plenty of room to express himself too.
 
Omg. It's great to hear this. Maybe that haircut was the confidence you needed.

Being exotic is hard if you are on the spectrum, because you must draw a lot of attention. But this means you present yourself with confidence!
 
Omg. It's great to hear this. Maybe that haircut was the confidence you needed.

Being exotic is hard if you are on the spectrum, because you must draw a lot of attention. But this means you present yourself with confidence!
 
Thank you for all the support. I have three other potential matches even though this one is my favorite. CT guy doesn't initiate. Only responds sometimes and only wants me to contact him last minute because he is unsure of his schedule supposedly. Sucks. Either he's dealing with a lot and/or getting a lot of potential matches. Probably both.

One guy who is overly shy reached out to me again. He seems interested enough, but unsure. I do like his look. Not as much as CT guy, but that's okay. He's still physically attractive to me and doing well enough. He's very different than me, but seems to complement me well. Another guy has improved a lot in his life, but I feel more like it will be a quality friendship building with maybe a bit of fun. The 3rd person, he doesn't initiate at all and I liked him a lot, but the communication is lacking. His text messages from others weren't always going through to him, and he didn't trade any other contact info with me like Skype, Discord, or FB even though he confirmed he had those when I offered to communicate through at least one of those mediums since phone text wasn't working for him that well.
 
paloftoon said:
Thank you for all the support. I have three other potential matches even though this one is my favorite. CT guy doesn't initiate. Only responds sometimes and only wants me to contact him last minute because he is unsure of his schedule supposedly. Sucks. Either he's dealing with a lot and/or getting a lot of potential matches. Probably both.

One guy who is overly shy reached out to me again. He seems interested enough, but unsure. I do like his look. Not as much as CT guy, but that's okay. He's still physically attractive to me and doing well enough. He's very different than me, but seems to complement me well. Another guy has improved a lot in his life, but I feel more like it will be a quality friendship building with maybe a bit of fun. The 3rd person, he doesn't initiate at all and I liked him a lot, but the communication is lacking. His text messages from others weren't always going through to him, and he didn't trade any other contact info with me like Skype, Discord, or FB even though he confirmed he had those when I offered to communicate through at least one of those mediums since phone text wasn't working for him that well.
Click to expand...


Are these guys autistic or NT? I don't remember if you're self-diagnosed or professionally.
 
Magna said:
Are these guys autistic or NT? I don't remember if you're self-diagnosed or professionally.
Click to expand...

They are all NT. I'm not at a point where I tell them my "label" yet. If it somehow comes up in conversation or if I'm meeting them in-person for the 3rd time, then I start to offer up more.
 
Gerontius said:
Well did it go well?
Click to expand...
If you mean the guy who re-matched me, we had a nice phone call and we're supposed to meet Wed. evening. So, it's still in-process. I wouldn't say "well". It honestly feels like a drag to have to initiate everything with him- but especially since we're re-matching.

Another guy has usual text issues with his phone (or is way too shy and not being honest about it.) Not really think about the potential dishonesty. Just more the lack of initiation on his part.

A 3rd guy, he seems like a friend, maybe a good friend and maybe some benefits too. I'm not sure if it's going to be more than that.

and well CT guy- he apparently had a party yesterday and was preparing for it the day before. It's "nice" that he's responding, but he can't take me serious because of the distance and maybe he likes people that are more like him physically and interest wise :/

At least today I want to try a fried mac and chicken sandwich in another state! lol.
 
Last edited:
I hate online dating but I know that's the easiest way to meet people these days. It just seems that it's hard to keep someone's attention.

What do you mean that CT guy wants someone more like him "physically and interest wise?"
 
jleeb05 said:
I hate online dating but I know that's the easiest way to meet people these days. It just seems that it's hard to keep someone's attention.

What do you mean that CT guy wants someone more like him "physically and interest wise?"
Click to expand...

CT guy seems to have an average build body and I have a bit of flab. Also, his interests are all outdoor and mine are all indoor interest basically.
 
CT guy is a fake, ugh! He purposely won't make time. I asked him about 5 different days and he said he was busy on 3 of them, wouldn't answer about one of the dates, and said "That's nice" to one of the other days. He also said he was willing to travel to my area. He just wants to play games and wants pretty pictures and to show off ugh. It made me slightly paranoid enough to try to look him up. So I ended blocked him on LinkedIn. He's part of an lgbt professional network in CT. There are the type of people we may encounter in organizations that are supposed to be supportive, ugh. Feels like it's probably a white privilege thing too. . .
 
paloftoon said:
CT guy is a fake, ugh! He purposely won't make time. I asked him about 5 different days and he said he was busy on 3 of them, wouldn't answer about one of the dates, and said "That's nice" to one of the other days. He also said he was willing to travel to my area. He just wants to play games and wants pretty pictures and to show off ugh. It made me slightly paranoid enough to try to look him up. So I ended blocked him on LinkedIn. He's part of an lgbt professional network in CT. There are the type of people we may encounter in organizations that are supposed to be supportive, ugh. Feels like it's probably a white privilege thing too. . .
Click to expand...

Sorry to hear that! I wish people would be more direct. "That's nice?" What is that supposed to mean? If you don't want to hang out, just say so.
 
jleeb05 said:
Sorry to hear that! I wish people would be more direct. "That's nice?" What is that supposed to mean? If you don't want to hang out, just say so.
Click to expand...

It sounds nice to say that, but it's a veiled way of saying "I don't care about you. I can get a lot of other people I really like more."
 
paloftoon said:
It sounds nice to say that, but it's a veiled way of saying "I don't care about you. I can get a lot of other people I really like more."
Click to expand...
I am sorry to hear that! I wish I could offer more.
I really don't like how you described yourself as "too exotic". It's like a kindish way to dis yourself. Like thinking your not good enough because you aren't bland.
This long distance troll is just that, an ugly, self centered jerk. He does not deserve your delicious spicyness!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

New Threads

Top Bottom