Pure Hollywood Fiction then IRL.

[Tony Ramirez]

This I have to post with my experience with women my past 5 1/2 years of socializing with them.

Pure Hollywood Fiction	IRL
If you show emotions to a woman, she will like you.	You will scare her away if you keep doing it. She will actually want to avoid you.
Again same response when you get emotion she will suddenly kiss you.	She will run away and ghost you.
Act like a jerk, she will suddenly kiss you. (Never did this but showed mean expressions)	Best case, she will ignore you and leave. Worse, she will mace you.
Cold approach a woman and fall in love.	Again the best cast ignored or worse case insult public humiliation or a mace in the face.
Joining mostly women's groups, you will fall in love.	Most are married, boyfriends, boomers, they segregate the men and the women in the groups anyway.

 

[tree]

Knowing the difference between fiction and reality is useful.
People like fictional stories because they satisfy their fantasies.

Assuming that real life situations will play out they way they do
in fiction can result in disappointment. Fiction is constructed to
appeal to an audience. It doesn't have to be based in reality.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

Just real life experience @tree after living a life watching TV and movies for over a decade and believing it.

BTW I hate those Hollywood fictional movies TV shows now and I can't get through movies TV shows that implement that garbage in it anymore. I have not watched a Hallmark movie since Christmas 2019.

 

[FayetheAspie]

My own opinion as a woman concerning the above list.

Showing emotion - could be positive or negative depending on the emotion in question (either way would not kiss a random stranger just because they showed emotion)

Acting like a jerk - definite NO (I don't think men want to be slapped around and screamed at all the time. We don't either.)

Cold approach? - I'm not sure what that means.

Joining a group with a lot of women - Eh? It could work, but is far from certain. A lot of variables.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

Cold approach? It can work in some situations. I cold-called my future spouse because we both signed up for a trail maintenance project and she was looking to car pool to share gas costs and have company for a long drive. I had no qualms calling her because I thought it was only going to be transactional. Little did I realize that our interests were elements of what we were looking for in a partner. During our trip we did fall in love. It was preparation and luck because I was socially maturing at that time and was open to a relationship yet only called her because I was going to be near her for some fossil collecting before driving to the project.

 

[thejuice]

The showing emotion/(crying?) one I noticed recently. A woman told a story to me about a guy who was crying in a restaurant and what a baby he was and how embarrassing. I didn't say anything because I liked her as a friend, and kinda agree anyway. But that was the whole story, it did seem a little callous. I'm still sceptical of the whole "men should cry more" movement. I think women might sympathise but not necessarily respect you. At worst, mocking derision in this instance. It depends.

 

[FayetheAspie]

It sounds callous to me as well especially if there was a very serious reason for crying or if she don't know what the situation was. It actually irritates me when people mock someone for crying (unless it's obvious that the tears are a phoney act of course). Mean, what if someone had just died or something. What should he do, smile? I hope not.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

The showing emotion/(crying?) one I noticed recently. A woman told a story to me about a guy who was crying in a restaurant and what a baby he was and how embarrassing. I didn't say anything because I liked her as a friend, and kinda agree anyway. But that was the whole story, it did seem a little callous. I'm still sceptical of the whole "men should cry more" movement. I think women might sympathise but not necessarily respect you. At worst, mocking derision in this instance. It depends.

I learned that the hard way really which is why I created this post and how Hollywood fiction really pisses me off watching it all my life then emulated it IRL which then hurt bad. You know from our DM @thejuice what happened at my life groups when I tried to show emotions to women at church. It backfired so bad I still have more PTSD and anger now.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

 

[Metalhead]

I learned that being a pizza delivery guy is actually not that fun of a job, despite what I learned watching adult movies.

I also learned (on a more serious note) that it is easier to find a relationship if I love myself first. Confidence attracts others.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

I also learned (on a more serious note) that it is easier to find a relationship if I love myself first. Confidence attracts others

Damn I forgot that in my list. I don't believe that. IRL that's not true. In Hollywood fiction that's true IRL that does crap. I was confident and it did nothing except give me a painful textationship and more ostracism.

 

[tree]

@Tony Ramirez

Find a therapist yet?

 

[Metalhead]

Damn I forgot that in my list. I don't believe that. IRL that's not true. In Hollywood fiction that's true IRL that does crap. I was confident and it did nothing except give me a painful textationship and more ostracism.

You are too busy looking for a better half, but all humans are complete by themselves. Most people do not want a codependent relationship. This was one lesson I had to learn myself the hard way. Be your own better self without needing another. That is what people want.

 

[Shamar]

This I have to post with my experience with women my past 5 1/2 years of socializing with them.

Pure Hollywood Fiction	IRL
If you show emotions to a woman, she will like you.	You will scare her away if you keep doing it. She will actually want to avoid you.
Again same response when you get emotion she will suddenly kiss you.	She will run away and ghost you.
Act like a jerk, she will suddenly kiss you. (Never did this but showed mean expressions)	Best case, she will ignore you and leave. Worse, she will mace you.
Cold approach a woman and fall in love.	Again the best cast ignored or worse case insult public humiliation or a mace in the face.
Joining mostly women's groups, you will fall in love.	Most are married, boyfriends, boomers, they segregate the men and the women in the groups anyway.

I have a rule that almost never lets me down - - If it comes out of Hollywood, it is wrong.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

@Tony Ramirez

Find a therapist yet?

We have been looking it's been quite difficult. Many are full, actually don't take Medicaid $200+ a session or have waiting lists. Hospital was a dead end, friends was a dead end. Like my life was a dead end. Screw finding a therapist I give up like a relationship, education, job and living in my own.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

BTW I am feeling more optimistic with the church community I am currently in the one I joined in the summer I was referred during game night. Trying others and old places was a disaster which caused more stress but I am staying with them only.

 

[Mary Terry]

I learned that the hard way really which is why I created this post and how Hollywood fiction really pisses me off watching it all my life then emulated it IRL which then hurt bad. You know from our DM @thejuice what happened at my life groups when I tried to show emotions to women at church. It backfired so bad I still have more PTSD and anger now.

You should apply what you learned about Hollywood movies to your watching pornography.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

You should apply what you learned about Hollywood movies to your watching pornography.

I actually watch amateur real couples porn but I don't want to get into that personal stuff.

 

[Judge]

I actually watch amateur real couples porn but I don't want to get into that personal stuff.

@Mary Terry is right.

Even "amateur porn" is still scripted by the participants and whomever is technically handling the video technology that creates it. -A gimmick just to get you to buy into it.

It isn't "real", short of a couple being illegally filmed without their knowledge or consent. No more or less than any Hollywood production, equally scripted with the same intent and profit motive.