It's hard to take a shower because I can feel every drop of water go down my body. At times, I'll go almost a month without a shower. The sound of plates/utensils clacking together hurts. People talking close hurts. Hair touching my face makes me agitated. The clothes that I wear nip at me. I can feel blood flow and my heart beat. I squint, even when it's cloudy outside, and literally blinded when the sun is out. Going to church is hard, and having over 100+ people singing is unbearable.
Why do people say isolating yourself makes your sensory issues worse? Me getting out more, has made me exhausted. I can barely even walk through my own house with feeling overwhelmed.
Wow, I am 61.5 years old, and my sensory issues are not “desensitized.” I know what works for me and I take great measures to protect myself. One has got to do what one does....and I just had to quit not only my job, but the career I spent a long time training for.
I am proud of my sensitivity now, and know where I belong. I am challenged to find a life that supports my needs. I cannot tolerate bright light so I wear a long brim baseball cap in summertime. I try to avoid fluorescent lights (difficult to avoid in job environments though), room temperatures over 72 degrees F. (again, difficult in work environments because people complain that they are “cold” and demand 75 to 78 F.), and I detest any synthetic fabrics on me or next to me. I must wear natural leather or Cotten canvas shoes and nothing of synthetics!
Sound is a huge one for me- I hear the buzzing in fluorescent lights (as well as see the flickering), I hear wall clocks ticking, and cannot stand the sounds of others chewing, slurping, tapping, shuffling, talking, humming, etc. Sometimes are more difficult then others Like when I am stressed, or sick, or upset in any way.
I avoid big places like Walmart’s, shopping malls, and big grocery stores. I avoid shopping or errand running on weekends or holidays when everyone is out on roads. And shopping. The bigger the holiday, or weekend, the more likely I can be shut in, or in a nature preserve deep on a trail no one else uses.
I cannot tolerate the buzzing of lawn mowers, or the banging of construction equipment. I carry two types of rap plugs at all times, and wear both - at work, on the street, or in my home if need be.
I have lived my life with as much avoidance as I can muster, or found tricks and technology to assist me. I avoid crowds like parades, or beaches when there are throngs of humans.
I appreciate the quiet of nature, birds singing, leaves rustling, and the sound of spring comb frogs. I used to sleep with whales singing on a CD. I now live next to a freight train line, and actually find the rumble of trains quite soothing. Sometimes, I turn down the heat real cold in winter, and sleep with my layers of coats and hoods, and gloves on. This is oh so soothing and masks sounds also. I wish they made all-cotten sleeping bags so that I could cocoon deep inside.
I pretty much need to be alone as much as possible with my sensory issues. It’s ok by me.
