Pika123
New Member
( events aren't in chronological order )
I was touched by one of my cousins when I was little. I don't feel aware as I'm typing but I've had three traumatic sex experiences. One of my cousins touched me and told me not to tell anyone ( I'm a guy ). The next time my ex dad was naked while I walked into the room. He made a porn joke and that really upset me Third episode was a tall blonde girl who touched my butt while I was in middle school. This manifested into porn addiction while I was a kid. Just now I told my mom I touched myself. I know these forbidden sensations manifested into aloofness mixed with anxiety stress and temper tantrums. I want to stop it but zoning out doesn't help. I'm suffering. I had only felt guilt and paranoia ever since I've looked at bad images. Now I feel nothing. I don't even know how I'm typing. Anyone else can relate?
I was touched by one of my cousins when I was little. I don't feel aware as I'm typing but I've had three traumatic sex experiences. One of my cousins touched me and told me not to tell anyone ( I'm a guy ). The next time my ex dad was naked while I walked into the room. He made a porn joke and that really upset me Third episode was a tall blonde girl who touched my butt while I was in middle school. This manifested into porn addiction while I was a kid. Just now I told my mom I touched myself. I know these forbidden sensations manifested into aloofness mixed with anxiety stress and temper tantrums. I want to stop it but zoning out doesn't help. I'm suffering. I had only felt guilt and paranoia ever since I've looked at bad images. Now I feel nothing. I don't even know how I'm typing. Anyone else can relate?