Should I Call the Police?

[Cali Cat]

I heard from a friend of mine today. He lives in another state. He's married to a crazy woman.

They got into a huge argument over the weekend, and when he called me today it had escalated to physical violence. She hit him over the head with a long-handled police flashlight hard enough to draw blood.

He texted me that he was on his way to stay in a motel tonight and that he would contact me when he got there. It's been nearly three hours, and I've heard no word from him. I've talked to his mother, and she hasn't heard from him either and he won't text her back.

I honestly don't know what this man's wife is capable of doing. His mother seems to believe that she is capable of shooting him, and she does have a gun. She's already committed violence against him once today. I'm very worried because it's not like him to not get back to me for this length of time. I also called his phone and it went directly to voicemail. That means his phone is off. He wouldn't shut his phone off under these circumstances. I think maybe she smashed his phone. She did smash her own phone with a hammer during another argument of theirs.

I honestly don't know what to do at this point. I wonder if maybe I should call the police and have them go by the house and see if he's okay. I worry though that maybe they have patched things up and that might cause more trouble. She hates me anyway.

See? This is why I don't have friends as a general rule. Now my night is ruined, and my friend may be in need of medical attention or dead. If he's not dead, and he's just not getting back to me, he may be dead anyway when I get done with him.

So, what do you think? Cops, or no cops?

 

[Crossbreed]

I would call their non-emergency line and tell them what you told us. They can decide if they need to follow through.

(If he goes to sleep with a concussion, he might never wake up.) And don't erase any of his texts.

 

[garnetflower13]

How awful! I agree with calling the non-emergency number and relaying the info you shared. There is such a thing as a well-being check by police (not sure if it is called that) where it is perfectly acceptable to have the police check on someone that you're concerned about. Please keep us informed!

 

[Crossbreed]

There is such a thing as a well-being check by police (not sure if it is called that) where it is perfectly acceptable to have the police check on someone that you're concerned about.

I had to look it up, too. It is called a Police Welfare Check.

 

[Cali Cat]

(If he goes to sleep with a concussion, he might never wake up.)

That's exactly what I'm worried about too. Thank you.

 

[Cali Cat]

I had to look it up, too. It is called a Police Welfare Check.

Thank you for this.

 

[Cali Cat]

I just made the welfare check call. His wife is going to be so pissed off. I hope I haven't gotten him into more trouble.

I guess there's nothing to do but wait and see.

I have to call the police back in an hour to see if they made contact.

 

[Cali Cat]

Well, it turns out my friend was not at home, so I'm guessing that he made it to the hotel alright. I don't know what happened to his phone though. If I don't hear from him tomorrow I'll expect that either he left without his charger and the phone has died or she broke it before he left.

At least she didn't shoot him.

 

[Crossbreed]

Are they going to look for him at the motel or for his car?

 

[Cali Cat]

Are they going to look for him at the motel or for his car?

No, that would be a missing persons report. It has to be 24 hours for that.

It's okay though, he finally texted me in the middle of the night. He "forgot" to do that when he got to the motel, and his phone was dying, so he put it on the charger and went out.

I read him the riot act, and told him to never involve me in his martial problems again.

Thanks for your help though.

 

[garnetflower13]

Oh, I'm so glad he made it out OK! And I'm glad that you read him the riot act, because I hate it when people involve one in their issues then forget to inform about the outcome.

 

[Judge]

Under the circumstances it really sounds like it's incumbent on him to make a decision of contacting the police. Otherwise as you already seem to know filing a missing persons report is probably the best you can do as a concerned third party. But if you're in touch with him...it's a moot point. Frustrating though for you when you know what's happening.

Violent domestic disputes are among the most dangerous calls the police routinely make. No laughing matter for sure.