Social weekend - challenging my assumptions

[leehart]

Hi all. This past weekend I have been away at a big conference which generally requires small talk (which I hate and avoid) and catching up with better known people. With what I have been reflecting on here I was able to challenge myself a bit. For example:

When arriving a bumped into someone I know fairly well, he said hi but quickly turned away to chat with a few others we know. Normally I would react to that with a feeling of uncertainty and rejection and avoid him for the rest of the conference! As I walked to the car though pondering that I decided to consider I might be misunderstanding the situation. When I saw him again I made sure to go and chat and he seemed fine.

It struck me that reflecting on how I cope and respond and where the weaknesses might be might not mean I disappear into myself but enable me to cope better than I currently do!

 

[GadAbout]

Try to view a conference involving a lot of networking as an opportunity, while also viewing it as a challenge. Make a goal of striking up (for example) one conversation, however brief, with a stranger, saying hello to three people you already know, and sharing a meal or coffee with someone you feel closer to like a colleague.

If you can do that, you "won" the conference. You get to pick the actual tasks, not me, so maybe you will select different ones. The point is this is challenging for you, but don't view it as impossible. Make goals that are realistic and reward yourself for any successes.

Sounds like you are well on your way to dealing constructively with conferences. Get extra rest before and after, to reflect that these things are hard for you.

 

[Aspychata]

That's great you stepped outside of your comfort zone. Often times it has nothing to do with us but we internalize it.

People have all kinds of multitasking these days, l never take anything personally anymore. It's a waste of time, then you find out you completely misread the situtation.

Glad you came and shared your success,hope it inspires someone else here.

The next time that exact situation pops up, try following along and say hello to the people you both knew. A funny comedic line would make everyone focus on you and they would remember how you made them laugh. Often times somebody else will continue the banter and you have just entered the world of *NT*. lol