Sometimes we need a little something that isn't easy to find...

[Chance]

That something we need is locked inside us by things that have happened to us usually.
I think I watched this video probably 10 times, maybe more... Because it hits really close to home in how my life has been... Too close actually.

What I learned is that what I need is the same thing every person on this earth needs... Not only someone to care for us, but us to become someone who cares.

Maybe it will help someone, or help you as you try and find your place in LIFE, as I always try and find mine. : )

Oh and no fear is has no bad language...

 

[Major Tom]

This was very powerful, thanks for sharing.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

The success of their wonderful choice or the failure of their stupid choice.

Nice.

 

[OkRad]

Interesting. But I have to say, the way things are, I am not so sure that a 5 minute vid can do anything for most of this world, now.

I supposed if I lived in an upscale place, and had a secure home and job and loving family and security.....I suppose THEN, I could operate in choice mode.

Sure, we all have choices. The homeless guy has a choice to eat the crappy donut at the place he only has to walk 5 miles to get to, or he has a choice to walk 7 miles to get to the place where they serve actual eggs. But then he has a blister on his foot and it's windy and freezing.

Do we really have choices?

I am not so sure.

Out choices are constricted based on our genes, our family, our backgrounds, our society, our countries, socioeconomics, etc etc etc.......

We can be like the lady at Wal Mart who INSISTS that Oprah said we can change, but when you are in a place that affords little choice, you think you are loaded with choice and it's just your fault.

But the higher up you go, the more educated the person you talk with, they get it.

Here is a great article on a study which shows the more inept people are, the smarter they think they are.

Those who can , DO. Those who can't just go around in circles, thinking they can, thinking they will very soon, thinking someone is to blame, etc. instead of just accepting that sometimes, people really are in the place in which they will always remain.

In this light, it is the people who CAN and DON'T who are to blame, not those who really have no choice and are told they do. Yes, I know people who clawed their way out, but I know more who did not. We should blame those who have and don't not those who can't and don't.

You can still have a meaningful life without always chasing a mirage.


The more inept you are the smarter you think you are

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

Here is a great article on a study which shows the more inept people are, the smarter they think they are.

The dunning krugger effect.

People take prior positions all the time. The more you confront them with facts the srtonger they fight to holdmtheir prior opinion.
Richard Thaler,nudge theory had some interesting stuff on this.

How,if you approach people differently, they can explore themselves how they formed their own opinion.
Thaler was more behavioural economics.
Krishnamurti,imo,had a similar method in his teachings.
He would try and take people out of their prior judgments and perceptions and take responsibilty formthem under the guise of them exploring together.

But,in a pecking order soecietal sense, its not logical to take responsibility - it can be perceived as weakness.
Ie saying 'my fault' can sometimes be losing points in your social group or work group.
Daft from our perspective.

So,okra dee, i agree.

Not chasing the mirage can be the best out of many worse outcomes.

Serenity prayer, perhaps.

 

[Warmheart]

Thank you for sharing this, Chance.

 

[LucyPurrs]

Have always believed genuine caring is one of the most powerful things there is in human relationships. That sounds stupid but hopefully you get what I mean.

 

[Judge]

Have always believed genuine caring is one of the most powerful things there is in human relationships. That sounds stupid but hopefully you get what I mean.

It doesn't sound "stupid" to me at all. It's what IMO can define the difference between conditional and unconditional love.

 

[LucyPurrs]

It doesn't sound "stupid" to me at all. It's what IMO can define the difference between conditional and unconditional love.

Thanks Judge, you get what I mean. But many people find this very unexpected also and tend to doubt the caring which is sad.

 

[Judge]

Thanks Judge, you get what I mean. But many people find this very unexpected also and tend to doubt the caring which is sad.

True. Some of us get to a point in life all bruised and battered it becomes very difficult to determine one from another and it's easy to become jaded. I'm no exception to this myself.

 

[LucyPurrs]

True. Some of us get to a point in life all bruised and battered it becomes very difficult to determine one from another and it's easy to become jaded. I'm no exception to this myself.

Understandable.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

Thanks Judge, you get what I mean. But many people find this very unexpected also and tend to doubt the caring which is sad.

The social law of reciprocation.

Some are not able to receive gifts in the spirit which they were intended.

They assume an obligation with the gift.

As they can't understand giving freely without motive.

 

[Chance]

Its cool (but also different) how each of us might perceive something we hear, or watch (like that video).

I kind of disagree about not having a choice... I do think there are circumstances where stuff just happens and makes things go really bad, but it never has to stay that way.

We MAKE the choices (often way before the bad stuff actually hits the fan) that determine if we will be dead, homeless or in jail... Not always, but much of the time, our outcome is from the choices we make... To deny that is simply to blame everyone else for my problems - which I refuse to do (but I could do and be very right in doing so).

As I grew up...I hated the world. I trusted NO ONE. I was molested, abused, beat freaking unconscious twice, abandoned (which was probably the best thing)... Later, I tried to end my life. I could choose to hate people. I could chose to do horrible things to kids. I could choose to never trust a soul again... I CHOOSE that I am better than that, and I am not here to carry on the horrible crap I had to live through...

I think that horrible stuff was actually what made me choose to be so different than most people around me. I think it made me care more than others, because I cant possibly ever become the monsters I grew up hating. I forgave them and my life changed. No one can take that away from me.

I do think a mass of people are looking for hope (even though hope is a beggar). I see a world stumbling, who is going to be there is no one cares? I will be, and those like me will be, because we KNOW that even a change in mindset equals a choice to get up, or stay in a personal hell.

 

[OkRad]

PS. In no way did I want to disparage your post, @Chance ! I do go in and out of Choice mode. So sometimes that vid would be great for me, other times a poke in the eye.......

Makes me wonder how much is Chance, no pun intended. Even Aristotle felt Luck was imperative. Like is it even Chance that we can choose?

Clearly I was off Choice Mode when I watched it!

 

[Gritches]

Oh my God. This touched my heart and resonated with me so much. I don't even know what to say...dead, homeless, or in jail. Yeah. That's pretty much the score.

 

[Chance]

PS. In no way did I want to disparage your post, @Chance ! I do go in and out of Choice mode. So sometimes that vid would be great for me, other times a poke in the eye.......

Makes me wonder how much is Chance, no pun intended. Even Aristotle felt Luck was imperative. Like is it even Chance that we can choose?

I used to believe in "luck" or "chance" but not much anymore. Sure you can get lucky and win the lottery, but that is a lightning strike, and it has not much do do with real everyday life...

I can look at any point in my LIFE where I made good or bad choices and I own those choices, every time. I also know I will make more bad choices (if only for lack of insight or knowledge) but "luck" has just never been something that seemed to care for me much...

People who worry over luck to me are like the people in your article... I cant fall into that, otherwise I don't really have much of a reason to live. Basically that article was pointing out ways to make people feel stupid, then prove they were stupider than they thought... And yes there are stupid people out there and I might be one of the most ignorant people on the face of the planet... But is that what we want to do with the time we have here?

Most people are trying to understand LIFE and they are soaked in technology, horrible hole filled teachings, and twisted traditions, that are choking them from ever getting past any of it... Very few people even dare to believe there is more out there, because people say that is stupid to think there is something better... And then big men with big titles before and after their names, only make us look even more stupid for daring to try and become better... I simply don't get it. I never will...

I also know my approach is not for everyone and I'm sorry if it hit you wrong... But if people stop caring, stop taking responsibility, and stop trying, and only find reasons to not believe there is a better life out there for every single one of us who choose that to be so... Then there isn't much reason for the sun to even rise tomorrow for me.

I don't want to go to the grave pointing out how unlucky I was... or how bad I was treated. I want to go to the grave owning my bad decisions, and the few good ones I might find at some point, because I will dig until I find what I am looking for, or I will die first... Its that simple : )

PS I'm not upset with you at all... You have every right to your opinion always... We can disagree and should at times... Its what makes us who we are. I might even be wrong on all of this...
But I own it. : )

 

[OkRad]

I used to believe in "luck" or "chance" but not much anymore.

And yet, your screen name.....
We are all mysteries with our Screen names!!

 

[Chance]

And yet, your screen name.....
We are all mysteries with our Screen names!!

No mystery... I have been called that all my life. I think it was cause of when i was born, and not expected to make it...

 

[JDartistic]

After reading this, for some reason, I thought of this quote by Charles Bukowski:

WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE, ALL OF US; WHAT A CIRCUS! THAT ALONE SHOULD MAKE US LOVE EACH OTHER, BUT IT DOESN'T...