• Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Private Member only forums for more serious discussions that you may wish to not have guests or search engines access to.
    • Your very own blog. Write about anything you like on your own individual blog.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral

Teen Aspie, getting first job!?

D

Diana

New Member
Hey there, New to this,hoping someone has been in this situation. My son is 16 this week, and will start the process of looking for a job. I'm not sure if I should have him disclose his pdd/aspie diagnosis or not? He loves to help people and serve others so I feel he will do great once he geta going. Just unsure about the "start"
Also, he doesn't want to drive, and I'm supportive of that decision, when he's ready he will. However, I've been encouraging him to get his permit so he can take driving lessons at driving school so he will be comfortable when he decides he's ready. He has taken the permit test 8 times, and hasn't passed yet. Any pointers out there for that? Thanks in advance!
 
I understand that for some Aspies, practice is key for driving. Can he get more?

I would not disclose. Just use words that declare how one works best, like "I really dislike having something I need to concentrate on but I keep getting prevented, I don't do my best that way," or whatever his issues might be in a job situation.
 
Thank you for your reply. Yes, he can get more practice, once he passes the permit portion. That's the tough part so far. Thanks again.
 
in regards to a job, no. do not disclose the diagnosis, whatever you do. when an employer hears the word "autism" or "aspergers" they can get reaaaaaaally uneasy. unless you're really lucky, employers won't be very receptive to any challenges your son may have regarding the workforce. i know i have problems with getting started on tasks myself, especially since being alone makes me terrified and causes me to stop doing things and even run away from what i am doing if there are not other people around. try to mention the symptoms your son struggles with, not the condition they are connected to. the employer will be a lot more sympathetic that way. however, this is just my experience, and of course what i'm going through is a completely different set of circumstances than what you and your son are going through.
 
The only time you should disclose is through a program which promotes people on the spectrum for jobs I think, or if it's through a service which is directly helping that individual get a job.
 
Getting a job could be a huge change in direction for your son. When I was 16 I got my first job working at a super market. To my horror the only position I could get was cashier. I wanted to work in any part besides that one. However I was determined to work, I wanted to have my own car and that required money. The cashier job was a blessing in disguise. I quickly went from an awkward teen who would barely speak to anyone, to an awkward teen who could at least carry on a conversation without much trouble. Not a conversation in a particularly skilled kind of way, but at least enough to keep talking with a customer going through. I even was able to carry on conversation with female coworkers. Again not in a skilled enough sort of way that they would have any interest beyond passing the time, but it was something. I worked there for almost 2 years until I started community college.

I say do not disclose about his condition unless it is so severe that people immediately wonder what is wrong with him. Disclosing usually just results in bad things coming from a narrow minded and uneducated (or maybe selectively educated/indoctrinated) society.

For the driving thing I guess just practice practice. I can't particularly relate to that bit because I have always loved driving and am good at it. Well over 600,000km now without an at fault accident. And the ability to recover a vehicle that may be sliding out of control (winter climate) with confidence. If I had been born into a wealthy family I firmly believe I could have been a successful race car driver.
 
Hello & welcome. It sounds like he is failing the written test. If he doesn't already, get him accustomed to bicycling in the street (and associated rules).
This helps in three ways:
  1. He will get an experiential sense of the rules of the road and why they are in place.
  2. Many of those rules will transfer into driving.
  3. He can learn them without having to learn the complicated skillset of operating an automobile at the same time.
Once he gets comfortable on the road, most of the written test will make more sense to him. And he can then focus on vehicle operation.
 
Diana said:
Hey there, New to this,hoping someone has been in this situation. My son is 16 this week, and will start the process of looking for a job. I'm not sure if I should have him disclose his pdd/aspie diagnosis or not? He loves to help people and serve others so I feel he will do great once he geta going. Just unsure about the "start"
Also, he doesn't want to drive, and I'm supportive of that decision, when he's ready he will. However, I've been encouraging him to get his permit so he can take driving lessons at driving school so he will be comfortable when he decides he's ready. He has taken the permit test 8 times, and hasn't passed yet. Any pointers out there for that? Thanks in advance!
Click to expand...

Hi Diana. Welcome to AC!!!

It seems as if you have two main problems: the written test for the permit and driving practice. He may be failing the writtten test because of fear of the driving part. If you think this may be the case, you might take him somewhere he can practice driving legally and safely. In the US it is legal to drive without a license on private property.

I had a lot of trouble getting my license due to emotional issues dealing with my Dad insisting he teach me. He was terrible at it.

I went to an enormous empty church parking lot with a friend driving. We switched seats at the parking lot and I practiced driving a while. It works better to pick a site that has a little hill on it for practice with gears. That way to practice is pretty safe and lowers stress about driving.

A way to practice for the written test is to look at the drivers license manual or a copy of the test that was failed, and make flash cards for the questions. Let him practice a while first, then start drilling him with the flash cards.

There are computer programs that will generate flash cards, if you don't want to make them.

If you did not keep copies of the tests that he failed, start doing that to get better flash card questions.
 
I wouldn't disclose the diagnose, but I would mention what your son needs to function optimally at his job. For instance, I usually tell employers i strongly prefer written instructions and I have a preference for working by myself, as opposed to group projects.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

New Threads

Top Bottom