The social skills involved with negotiating price

[King_Oni]

So, every once in a while I end up selling or buying things online. Some new, some used items. Every once in a while I end up at a 2nd hand store. And one of the main things that happens a lot with this is negotiating price. Haggling over price might be another way of putting it. Bartering, not so much, since that often involves exchange of items for items without money as a medium.

To me this is a totally different aspect of social skills. It's probably more business oriented, as well as part of "standing up for yourself" and stating what you think is fair. And thus I'm interested how others deal with this. Do you think you can barter fine when it comes rounding of a deal? Or do you just agree on any set price as long as it's reasonable. Or do you engage in a purchase but afterwards beat yourself up about it because you actually overpaid but just couldn't say no.

Why I think it's different is because it involves communication with someone that's partially based on facts. And facts and information are something quite a lot of us care a lot for.

Mind you, this isn't a thread to ask who buys used items or someone who doesn't because he/she's a germophobe. It's purely the social aspect from doing trades and how you manage those, since, like I pointed out, it's somewhat based on facts, since you quite often have pricing information around somewhere. There's a reference point to what it's worth, and those are often locally (or even globally set).

So, how do the folks here on AC go on and about this?

 

[Christy]

I'm very poor at this king oni. Whether it be at a garage sale or "discussing" a quote I've obtained for work, I have a lot of trouble both gauging what a fair price would be, and also knowing how to discuss it. I've passed up many items because I'm too anxious to negotiate, and at work I get someone else's opinion on whether its a fair price before I phone to discuss it with the sub consultant.

 

[jimited]

I'm terrible at negotiating. I always end up paying what ever I am told whether I think it is reasonable or not.

 

[MoCoffee]

I am definitely one of those people who pays the asking price and regrets it later. Just thinking about haggling makes me anxious!

 

[Judge]

TV shows like "Pawn Stars" provide a very basic form of haggling techniques. As long as you understand from the outset that a pawn broker is going to aggressively bid for most anything at no more than 50% of the perceived market value. Know the math and the market value before you go through a pawn broker's doors.

Big ticket items like automobiles? Pays to use the Internet to determine the actual invoice cost. Find a realistic percentage over the invoice cost and stick to it like glue. Also helps to buy a car no earlier than September in any year. Timing is everything...

Whether you feel limited by your Aspieness or not, objective let math and timing be your guide rather than subjective behavioral considerations.

 

[grapesicles]

I go to car boot sales a lot, both buying and selling, so I've become more confident at doing this. I try to be as polite as possible and negotiate reasonably, ie. I may ask how much two items are that I'm interested in, they say £3 each, I ask "would you sell them together for £5" and the worst they can say is no. Or if something's out of my price range, I'll make an offer of what I can afford and if they refuse, I tell them I don't have enough on me or that I can't afford it (because it's true).

I just put my fake confidence on, smile and be friendly - there's nothing worse than rude customers asking for a discount. Also if something's already very cheap, it's also rude to ask for a better deal, ie. asking to pay 75p for something that's £1! I just remember that from experience in the seller position, I'm much more likely to be kind to someone who approaches me nicely rather than someone who is rude or aggressive!

 

[tridianprime]

There is one technique that is perfect for us aspies. Put your hand in your pocket and pretend you have a gun. Oh wait... I'll probably get nervous and forget my lines.

 

[wyverary]

There is one technique that is perfect for us aspies. Put your hand in your pocket and pretend you have a gun. Oh wait... I'll probably get nervous and forget my lines.

That seems like a pretty good way to get arrested, which I imagine would have some detrimental effects on acquiring/selling the item.