Thinking

[Will 25]

Hi... So Im 25 and kinda been going thru this process seriously this last week.... My nephew has autism and my sister is a very educated mom because of it and wants to know everything she can to be a better mom to me.... She brought it up this week in a polite way that she is concerned for me and the way my life has been and that she believes I may have Asperger's or high functioning autism... I have been looking up alot of information to borderline becoming an insomniac because I cannot sleep without knowing more there is a fear in me with being officaoffi tested even though I exhibit almost every sign or symptom.... And I took an online test and scored a 45 and anything above a 34 was a high likelyhood of autism high functioning but, and I say this with no disrespect to anyone, I am afraid to be officallof diagnosed because I feel dumb and I am worried about being treated diffrentdif between my family and wife I have struggled in many areas and been misdiagnosed with multiple mental disorders multiple times and could never feel right or be right no matter how many medications I tried no matter how many combinations of medications or therapy or anything for that matter and the problem still persists and the more I have read and consumed knowledge from different people websites or books the more and more I am seeing signs and symptoms and being aware of what I am doing personally and things I have persistently tried to ignore to feel or look normal like everyone else... I'm struggling emotionally and mentally trying to accept or grasp the reality of having this and being properly tested for it.... Can anyone help or give me guidance or advice?

 

[Nitro]

 

[AO1501]

Welcome!

First thing is that there is nothing wrong with being autistic, nothing wrong with having Asperger's. It doesn't change who you are, because you're that person already. What is does is help explain you better.

Therapies and medications won't really help much because it isn't something that can be fixed. It's the way your brain is wired, which isn't the same as some of those other people you've seen who 'look normal'. It just makes you different, not worse.

There is really no reason you need to fear an official diagnosis. If you are an Aspie, you are one now, not just after. Likewise, there is really no reason you need an official diagnosis unless a support program of financial support depends on it. So you can wait until you are more comfortable with it being made official, and in the meantime, hang out here, with us, and read and ask questions, because that's what this site is for, and because there are a lot of members here who will be happy to read what you write, and help you better understand what Asperger's Syndrome means, and whether it is what you have.

 

[Will 25]

Welcome!

First thing is that there is nothing wrong with being autistic, nothing wrong with having Asperger's. It doesn't change who you are, because you're that person already. What is does is help explain you better.

Therapies and medications won't really help much because it isn't something that can be fixed. It's the way your brain is wired, which isn't the same as some of those other people you've seen who 'look normal'. It just makes you different, not worse.

There is really no reason you need to fear an official diagnosis. If you are an Aspie, you are one now, not just after. Likewise, there is really no reason you need an official diagnosis unless a support program of financial support depends on it. So you can wait until you are more comfortable with it being made official, and in the meantime, hang out here, with us, and read and ask questions, because that's what this site is for, and because there are a lot of members here who will be happy to read what you write, and help you better understand what Asperger's Syndrome means, and whether it is what you have.

Well yea it hasn't gotten to the point I can get a job but can't keep it and idk it's just caused alot of things in my outside world to deteriorate to the point of I think I will have to get help... In appreciate your reply I think that's my flwed thinking is I can just shove it under the rug

 

[AO1501]

Well yea it hasn't gotten to the point I can get a job but can't keep it and idk it's just caused alot of things in my outside world to deteriorate to the point of I think I will have to get help... In appreciate your reply I think that's my flwed thinking is I can just shove it under the rug

If you are on the autism spectrum, it will inevitably create a whole lot of differences between you and much of the rest of the world, and can make trying to work things out - even yourself - very hard to do. And it is hardly a surprise that the reaction is to try and brush everything under the carpet - lots of people wish that was possible!

But you have to get some sense of who you are yourself before you can then go on to make sense of everything else.

If you tell us more about yourself and the issues you are experiencing, we may be able to help with a little bit of guidance and some ideas.

 

[Bolletje]

Welcome! You don’t have to fear diagnosis, it won’t change who you are. Of course, it does attach a label to you, but it also helps you make sense of things. If you are diagnosed, you’re under no obligation to disclose the diagnosis to anyone. It’s your personal business and it’s up to you to decide who has to know.

I can understand you’ve got a lot going on in your head at the moment. When my therapist suggested assessing me for autism I had a bit of a freak out as well. I had to go through all of the stages of grief before I realized that the diagnosis did not change who I am at all, but it did give me a clear understanding of why I am the way I am, and why I sometimes struggle with things that “normal people” have no issues with. I could stop beating myself up (mentally) over being different. And it actually allowed me to flourish afterwards, because with that understanding came acceptance.

Whichever route you choose to take, diagnosis or not, I hope you find some wisdom here.