Totally new to all this.....

[bigfootjrf81]

Hello...

So here I am on an Asperger's syndrome discussion board. The realization that I might have this DSM diagnosable "disorder" has only just recently come to me. I have not been formally diagnosed but the patterns inherent in my life for the last 33 years cannot be overlooked.

I currently work in mental health as a case manager, so I experience people on a daily basis with some form of addiction, disability, or disorder. This has been a life-altering, tremendous weight that I am split in two about. Half of me rejoices because this could be an answer to so many questions in my life; whereas, on the other hand, it is still something I must, as I tell my clients, learn the proper skills and coping strategies to work through.

Please feel free to ask me questions. I will answer honestly and openly. Please ask questions; it will help me to understand myself and this whole asperger thing.

I appreciate any help or support.

Thank you,
Bigfoot

 

[Warwick C]

Welcome to the forum Big foot, where abouts are you from.

 

[Turk]

Hi Bigfoot and welcome. Many of us are self diagnosed and yes finding answers, to our life questions, are like fire and ice. Knowing about it and mixing with like minded people, goes a long way, to feeling better about our lives.
Cheers
Turk

 

[Vanilla]

Welcome

Also a self-diagnosed Aspie here. I know how learning about such a life-altering phenomenon can cause you to have many questions about yourself, so as you've requested, here are a few questions to get your juices flowing:

- What triggered your epiphany, when you had suddenly realised that you might have Aspergers?
- How do you feel about this self-diagnoses?
- How has this changed your perception of yourself?
- Do you plan on getting a formal diagnoses?
- Have you made any adjustments in your life to accommodate your new found self-diagnoses, and what are they?
- Do you have any concerns that you wish to share?
- Have you spoken to loved ones about this? If so, are they supportive?
- What traits do you possess, which could be typically described as Aspergers's traits?
- What are your interests/ obsessions (if any)?

I'll leave you with those for now; feel free to answer as many, or as few, as you feel comfortable with.

 

[Zack]

Hello Bigfoot,

I am new to this site as well. I think we are in the same boat in terms of coping with and discovering new things about AS. I am also self-diagnosed, and this site has, so far (for the day I have been here), been extremely helpful and comforting. I think you will be able to find what you are looking for.

 

[bigfootjrf81]

Turk, Zack, and Brent:

Thank you very much for the welcome.


~~~The Bigfoot~~~

 

[Brent]

Welcome

 

[bigfootjrf81]

Vanilla:

I have always known that something was different with the way I look at the world. During my school days, I was frequently called names (weird, freak, odd duck(my favorite lol)).

The "realization" was not mine but my wife's. The other night we were having ANOTHER discussion about my lack of intimacy lack of perceived compassion etc. Yes I said another, and boy was she angry. Instead of fighting with her again, I opened up to my wife and told her things about my childhood. She felt pity but she also said later I said something that "triggered" something she had seen on tv or heard from a friend.

The next day she very gently asked me to sit with her. She asked me if I would be open to listening to a list of signs and symptoms. I cannot even begin to express what it felt like hearing my whole life-story being poured out in a list.

Anyway, I ramble, FYI. I will answer more of the questions at a later time. Thank you so much for asking them. As this is a support-type board, I'm hoping no one will be offended if I possibly say something that could come across in a certain way. If I do, I apologize in advance.


~~~The Bigfoot~~~

 

[Paige]

What are your hobbies?

 

[bigfootjrf81]

What are your hobbies?

Pretty much just reading. I study a lot. I like to watch cartoons with my boys (4 and 7). I also love to sing and make music.

Thankfully, all you know about me is a screen name (lol) so I have the freedom to say as a 33 year old man, I can't stand adult shows. I usually watch cartoons with my kids. Truth be told I enjoy it just as much as they do. I put that little blurb in there because I heard that is also one of the key things is interests in things that are not your age group.

 

[Judge]

Hello...

Half of me rejoices because this could be an answer to so many questions in my life; whereas, on the other hand, it is still something I must, as I tell my clients, learn the proper skills and coping strategies to work through.

This is true! But simply put, it's better to know. Otherwise there's little chance of self-improvement, whatever that ultimately entails.

Welcome Bigfoot!

 

[bigfootjrf81]

Welcome

Also a self-diagnosed Aspie here. I know how learning about such a life-altering phenomenon can cause you to have many questions about yourself, so as you've requested, here are a few questions to get your juices flowing:

- What triggered your epiphany, when you had suddenly realised that you might have Aspergers?
- How do you feel about this self-diagnoses?
- How has this changed your perception of yourself?
- Do you plan on getting a formal diagnoses?
- Have you made any adjustments in your life to accommodate your new found self-diagnoses, and what are they?
- Do you have any concerns that you wish to share?
- Have you spoken to loved ones about this? If so, are they supportive?
- What traits do you possess, which could be typically described as Aspergers's traits?
- What are your interests/ obsessions (if any)?

I'll leave you with those for now; feel free to answer as many, or as few, as you feel comfortable with.

I'll answer the traits question, as that could help both of us to a better understanding....

First thing you need to know about me is even if this all does pan out, I have no choice but to be in social situations. I am 6'10", 320 lbs. I stand out in a crowd regardless of whether I want to or not.

Anyway, the best way to describe my perceived-related traits is to tell you what is has felt like to be me all my life.

Long story made short (which for me is never the case. You've been warned lol), my mother has always told me that as a child I was a "heathen." We're talking ASPD here. She said I crushed little birds on the sidewalk and enjoyed it, set fires, pulled cat's tales, you name it. Mind you, I do not remember any of this. What I do remember still is as vivid as the day it happened; the day that my parents took me to an inpatient psychiatric hospital in San Diego, and then stepped onto that wood-paneled elevator as I watched the doors closed....

I don't remember how long I was in there. What I do remember is the next memory I have is not with my parents. They sent me to live with my uncle in Yuma. Don't know how long I was there either.

Anyway, (told you about those long stories, sorry) school life for me, shall we say, SUCKED. Oh, I was bright; even received a Presidential academic award. Alas, life at recess was not as happy. No friends, very VERY lonely. I used to sit by myself and make up songs that I can still remember the words to. FF to high school... By then, I had all of my imaginary friends and universes created. I had a VERY complex universe that I existed in. Every "person" had unique traits, powers, and personalities. My universe was the best friend I had. Of course, talking to myself as I was fighting an army single-handedly, or flying through space with my teammates was not considered "normal" and I learned quickly to hide it from people, especially my parents. Oh, BTW by that point in high school I had been diagnosed with ADHD, Oppositional Defiant, and depression. I was on short bursts of methylphenidate, zoloft, wellbutrin (ugh, allergic reaction. NEVER AGAIN).

FF to post high school. No maintainable job. No friends. Living with parents. Dragonball Z was my life! lol. I played with my mother's daycare kids. Loved children. Loved playing with them. Finally, I felt so much guilt and shame coming from my father, I motivated myself for the first time in my life and joined the United States Army.

In the Army, I was always voted in the bottom portion of the class by my peers. comments like "argues a lot," "doesn't help out, and "not a team player" hurt but I shrugged them off. BTW I should mention that even into my 20's my imaginary universe was still in full effect. I went on much fewer adventures, but I did nonetheless. I went to movies by myself, I went to dinner by myself. Life was lonely.....

FF to my deployment to Korea. I met my wife online at a christian website. The fact that she took such an interest in me excited me. We got married a year later.

I love my wife. She is my greatest friend and supporter..... And I DRIVE HER NUTS...lol. Some of the things she frequently complains of:
Never initiate romance
Don't help around house
Always involved with little things like video games or reading
Too loud all the time. Lower my voice
I don't like to talk. I shut people out
I am "weird" around people
I change around visitors
I act "goofy" in stores, restaurants, etc.
I "think" differently than "normal" people (not sure how to explain that one lol)
I pick at my face, arms, whatever
I chew my nails

I know that was a lot. I hope I don't have you running for the hills lol

In all seriousness, life for me as a child sucked. If this "disorder" whatever it is is the answer, I would be MOST grateful for all the support I can get. As I have already stated, I don't have many friends, so please feel free to talk to me. I won't ignore you, believe me. If anything, you'll probably get tired of hearing me vent, just like everybody else I've met and driven away.

Anyway, help would be awesome.

Thanks,

~~~~The Bigfoot~~~~

 

[Vanilla]

I'll answer the traits question, as that could help both of us to a better understanding....

First thing you need to know about me is even if this all does pan out, I have no choice but to be in social situations. I am 6'10", 320 lbs. I stand out in a crowd regardless of whether I want to or not.

Anyway, the best way to describe my perceived-related traits is to tell you what is has felt like to be me all my life.

Long story made short (which for me is never the case. You've been warned lol), my mother has always told me that as a child I was a "heathen." We're talking ASPD here. She said I crushed little birds on the sidewalk and enjoyed it, set fires, pulled cat's tales, you name it. Mind you, I do not remember any of this. What I do remember still is as vivid as the day it happened; the day that my parents took me to an inpatient psychiatric hospital in San Diego, and then stepped onto that wood-paneled elevator as I watched the doors closed....

I don't remember how long I was in there. What I do remember is the next memory I have is not with my parents. They sent me to live with my uncle in Yuma. Don't know how long I was there either.

Anyway, (told you about those long stories, sorry) school life for me, shall we say, SUCKED. Oh, I was bright; even received a Presidential academic award. Alas, life at recess was not as happy. No friends, very VERY lonely. I used to sit by myself and make up songs that I can still remember the words to. FF to high school... By then, I had all of my imaginary friends and universes created. I had a VERY complex universe that I existed in. Every "person" had unique traits, powers, and personalities. My universe was the best friend I had. Of course, talking to myself as I was fighting an army single-handedly, or flying through space with my teammates was not considered "normal" and I learned quickly to hide it from people, especially my parents. Oh, BTW by that point in high school I had been diagnosed with ADHD, Oppositional Defiant, and depression. I was on short bursts of methylphenidate, zoloft, wellbutrin (ugh, allergic reaction. NEVER AGAIN).

FF to post high school. No maintainable job. No friends. Living with parents. Dragonball Z was my life! lol. I played with my mother's daycare kids. Loved children. Loved playing with them. Finally, I felt so much guilt and shame coming from my father, I motivated myself for the first time in my life and joined the United States Army.

In the Army, I was always voted in the bottom portion of the class by my peers. comments like "argues a lot," "doesn't help out, and "not a team player" hurt but I shrugged them off. BTW I should mention that even into my 20's my imaginary universe was still in full effect. I went on much fewer adventures, but I did nonetheless. I went to movies by myself, I went to dinner by myself. Life was lonely.....

FF to my deployment to Korea. I met my wife online at a christian website. The fact that she took such an interest in me excited me. We got married a year later.

I love my wife. She is my greatest friend and supporter..... And I DRIVE HER NUTS...lol. Some of the things she frequently complains of:
Never initiate romance
Don't help around house
Always involved with little things like video games or reading
Too loud all the time. Lower my voice
I don't like to talk. I shut people out
I am "weird" around people
I change around visitors
I act "goofy" in stores, restaurants, etc.
I "think" differently than "normal" people (not sure how to explain that one lol)
I pick at my face, arms, whatever
I chew my nails

I know that was a lot. I hope I don't have you running for the hills lol

In all seriousness, life for me as a child sucked. If this "disorder" whatever it is is the answer, I would be MOST grateful for all the support I can get. As I have already stated, I don't have many friends, so please feel free to talk to me. I won't ignore you, believe me. If anything, you'll probably get tired of hearing me vent, just like everybody else I've met and driven away.

Anyway, help would be awesome.

Thanks,

~~~~The Bigfoot~~~~

It sounds like you needed to get that off your chest for some time now, I'm glad you were able to do that

Thanks for sharing your story, I'm sorry you've had to struggle with so much.

 

[bigfootjrf81]

It sounds like you needed to get that off your chest for some time now, I'm glad you were able to do that

Thanks for sharing your story, I'm sorry you've had to struggle with so much.

Thank you. I hope that my story "qualifies" me
Also, thank you for your profile. I saw your little blurb at the bottom and took those tests.
I got a 118 and a 100 on the "Aspie Quiz" (My wife took it for me at home and said she got a 145)
I got a "104(??)" on the RAADS-R.

Do you know what "neurotypicals" means?
How do I post that stuff like you did?

 

[Brent]

Thank you. I hope that my story "qualifies" me
Also, thank you for your profile. I saw your little blurb at the bottom and took those tests.
I got a 118 and a 100 on the "Aspie Quiz" (My wife took it for me at home and said she got a 145)
I got a "104(??)" on the RAADS-R.

Do you know what "neurotypicals" means?
How do I post that stuff like you did?

Anything you want to appear below every post you can add to your signature here: http://www.aspiescentral.com/account/signature

 

[Vanilla]

Thank you. I hope that my story "qualifies" me
Also, thank you for your profile. I saw your little blurb at the bottom and took those tests.
I got a 118 and a 100 on the "Aspie Quiz" (My wife took it for me at home and said she got a 145)
I got a "104(??)" on the RAADS-R.

Do you know what "neurotypicals" means?
How do I post that stuff like you did?

Glad to help

Neurotypical (or NT) simply means the norm; the majority of people on this planet, who are typically considered 'normal' (ie. without AS). Generally speaking, you would compare your score with NTs, as this would be the 'control' group to measure and determine where on the spectrum you are.