Uncomfortable work situation

[AuroraBorealis]

I'm really beating myself up right now.
I just had a talk with someone from HR at my work. They're sort of the disability representative. I wanted to ask whether my autism diagnosis gives me any special rights, and also mentioned my plan to reduce hours and that that's not always that easy. Long story short, I cried for about half the time. I must be way more exhausted and worn out than I thought. Now I'm worried that that might have any consequences for me, even though she emphasised that our talk had been confidential. I'm beating myself up for putting myself in such a vulnerable position at work.

 

[vergil96]

It sounds like you're really exhausted and really need the time off. I hope you manage to get better soon!

 

[Neonatal RRT]

Are you in the US?
Americans with Disabilities Act of 1990, As Amended

I will let you dig into it from here. "Special rights"? Quickly scanning it, probably not. "Considerations"? Limited.

I went this route a few years ago with HR and one of the questions was, "How long will this disability last?", as if I had an ankle sprain. I was like, "I was born with it and will likely die with it." Silence. LOL! The ADA, it seems, has a lot of wordy legal language to say very little, but maybe you can find something in there that might be worth pointing out to HR.

 

[Judge]

Try to be positive about this scenario. "Nothing ventured, nothing gained."

You did what you thought was best for yourself in the long run. Likely a common issue for many of us on the spectrum. A calculated quest based on risk versus reward.

Sometimes in life you do indeed have to make such a "leap of faith", regardless of the outcome. No point in beating yourself up about that.

Though based on your spelling, I assume you are not an American. If you were, I might have a somewhat different message.

 

[AuroraBorealis]

No, not American.

I will try to see this as a neutral thing. As you said, nothing gained, nothing lost. If she says it's confidential, then I will hope it was.

 

[Judge]

No, not American.

I will try to see this as a neutral thing. As you said, nothing gained, nothing lost. If she says it's confidential, then I will hope it was.

Something I would say to everyone one of us here.

That YOU are your best advocate and always will be.

 

[AuroraBorealis]

I feel embarrassed because, now, I wonder why I even went to talk to her. I knew there was nothing she could help me with. I just ended up breaking down crying in her office.
Maybe my subconscious wanted to let me know that I need and want help and that I am overworked and overwhelmed even though I don't realize it.

I hate crying in front of people and not being able to stop it.

 

[Judge]

I feel embarrassed because, now, I wonder why I even went to talk to her. I knew there was nothing she could help me with. I just ended up breaking down crying in her office.
Maybe my subconscious wanted to let me know that I need and want help and that I am overworked and overwhelmed even though I don't realize it.

I hate crying in front of people and not being able to stop it.

I've been there. In a job I held onto for much too long. I can still hear my boss yelling at me behind closed doors, "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

I didn't have an answer back then, other than I was in a job based on a "no-win scenario". But I chose to keep my mouth shut at the time. I quit six months later.

 

[Mary Terry]

It's okay, @AuroraBorealis. You weren't the first and won't be the last to cry during a HR meeting. I think you are worn out and it's no wonder. You've taken on a new, demanding job, moved to a new place, have new job responsibilities, etc. That is a heck of a lot of change and pressure to deal with, all at the same time. Please try to reduce your hours and take more time to recover from workday stress!

 

[AuroraBorealis]

It's okay, @AuroraBorealis. You weren't the first and won't be the last to cry during a HR meeting. I think you are worn out and it's no wonder. You've taken on a new, demanding job, moved to a new place, have new job responsibilities, etc. That is a heck of a lot of change and pressure to deal with, all at the same time. Please try to reduce your hours and take more time to recover from workday stress!

Thank you. I'll do that.