I am a 26 year old male. I feel that I may have Aspergers syndrome. One thing that has prevented from thinking that I have aspergers is that as a child I would laugh uncontrollably and get into trouble at school by teachers and principals thinking I was laughing at them, but really I had no idea why I was laughing so hard. I felt like I was annoying to a lot of people and this is a big reason why I started smoking marijuana at age 14, is so I could calm myself down. I worked as a busboy/ room service as a teenager and smoked all the time. My parents tried to get me help (and catching me smoking pot) through a couple of psychs due to moving around to different cities but I was always adamantly opposed to it. Now at age 26 with the social problems I am having I wish I would have taken advantage of their generosity.
There have been plenty of times where girls have come on to me in very straight forward ways and I have always chided away from them because other people where around us even if just one person. When I was 20 I began playing music for money and eventually moved across the country to a metroplex area to find more work. Before I moved I obtained an associates degree at a community college and made 0 friends in a 2 year time span. When I think about "friends" that I do have, there is only one person who I actively called once every couple of months and will actually talk to me; happens to be a high school friend. I feel like alot of "friends" I have had all thought of me as being annoying and I always had to invite myself to any kind of gathering, I am not someone who gets invitations to anything.
When I started playing music I received more attention from girls but I could never take advantage because of all of the people in the bars. If someone very beautiful, nice, would start talking to me I would just say hello and walk down the street, no goodbye or anything.
In the past year I have decided that this line of work is not for me. I am constantly told by people that I look mad, sad, not having a good time (my parents said this to me all the time growing up). I think that this is a reason why I am not getting more work. I have set things that I do but usually I have to play with people I don't really know or have not played with before and I never get to know any of these people or make any kind of conversation with them. I went to college for jazz studies last year but could not relate to anyone and made 0 friends again. I changed my major and again made 0 friends. I realized that gaining technology skills may serve me better in the long run if I make a long term commitment to it. I took A+ courses in the summer and am taking cisco courses currently.
I love to play music but I hate to teach and no longer do that anymore.
I write everything I need to do in a day down the night before, keep a Calendar, but the past few months have been very hard in terms of keeping a regular sleep pattern. If I'm not paid to be somewhere in the morning I just cannot get myself out of bed (I take night classes now). I've been applying to a hundred or so jobs over the past few months and I will admit I've missed interviews from being tired from a gig the night before or just not being able to go to sleep until 5 in the morning.
I do not have health insurance right now.
I sometimes can't get terrible phrases out of my head (about me) and repeat them constantly to myself when I'm alone. My productivity as of late has been pretty abysmal. In short, I don't have any friends that I hangout with, I've never been on a date, and I hardly talk to my family that is across the country. I like movies and music and thats pretty much it. I'm not sure what I have or if any of it could make me a person with aspergers, but I'm getting older and its making me look more weird everyday. I really feel like I need to get a handle on this before it is too late. Any information or suggestions would be appreciated. Thank you-
There have been plenty of times where girls have come on to me in very straight forward ways and I have always chided away from them because other people where around us even if just one person. When I was 20 I began playing music for money and eventually moved across the country to a metroplex area to find more work. Before I moved I obtained an associates degree at a community college and made 0 friends in a 2 year time span. When I think about "friends" that I do have, there is only one person who I actively called once every couple of months and will actually talk to me; happens to be a high school friend. I feel like alot of "friends" I have had all thought of me as being annoying and I always had to invite myself to any kind of gathering, I am not someone who gets invitations to anything.
When I started playing music I received more attention from girls but I could never take advantage because of all of the people in the bars. If someone very beautiful, nice, would start talking to me I would just say hello and walk down the street, no goodbye or anything.
In the past year I have decided that this line of work is not for me. I am constantly told by people that I look mad, sad, not having a good time (my parents said this to me all the time growing up). I think that this is a reason why I am not getting more work. I have set things that I do but usually I have to play with people I don't really know or have not played with before and I never get to know any of these people or make any kind of conversation with them. I went to college for jazz studies last year but could not relate to anyone and made 0 friends again. I changed my major and again made 0 friends. I realized that gaining technology skills may serve me better in the long run if I make a long term commitment to it. I took A+ courses in the summer and am taking cisco courses currently.
I love to play music but I hate to teach and no longer do that anymore.
I write everything I need to do in a day down the night before, keep a Calendar, but the past few months have been very hard in terms of keeping a regular sleep pattern. If I'm not paid to be somewhere in the morning I just cannot get myself out of bed (I take night classes now). I've been applying to a hundred or so jobs over the past few months and I will admit I've missed interviews from being tired from a gig the night before or just not being able to go to sleep until 5 in the morning.
I do not have health insurance right now.
I sometimes can't get terrible phrases out of my head (about me) and repeat them constantly to myself when I'm alone. My productivity as of late has been pretty abysmal. In short, I don't have any friends that I hangout with, I've never been on a date, and I hardly talk to my family that is across the country. I like movies and music and thats pretty much it. I'm not sure what I have or if any of it could make me a person with aspergers, but I'm getting older and its making me look more weird everyday. I really feel like I need to get a handle on this before it is too late. Any information or suggestions would be appreciated. Thank you-
