Want help to understand more about aspergers

[ASPERGER?]

My therapeutic that she thinks I have aspergers because I have never socialised through my school years and with my family I am 52 years old I have trust issues. Someone help me understand all of this I want to learn more about aspergers please. I am deaf in right ear partially deaf in my left ear and I have issues with loud noises I can feel the loud noises I have PTSD social anxiety OCD have issues with showing emotions. I get frustrated a lot. Thank you.

 

[Katherine Rawstron]

Hello. There is help out there, but how to access that help depends where you live, especially which country you live in. There are also books available that are easy to read. I don't know about self-help groups (if you feel that would help), but if you're interested in going down that route, you could Google it for your local area, or look in the Phonebook (if you can't use a phone, it will give an address to write to, or you can call in person).
If you live in the UK, Waterstone's stocks books on autism and Asperger's, and probably on the other issues you mentioned as well. You could also try Amazon, or Google the subject you're interested in.

 

[zurb]

Welcome to the site.
Feel free to browse around and ask questions.
Some books you may be interested in:
Congratulations! It's Aspergers Syndrome, by Jen Birch
Aspergirls, by Rudy Simone
The Complete Guide to Aspergers, by Tony Attwood (good, but long!)
Again, welcome to the site.

 

[Southern Discomfort]

Depending on what the OCD is it might be autistic behaviours. Things like wanting items to be symmetrical or in the right order can be common in people with Autistic Spectrum Conditions and there is a group of people on the spectrum who are misdiagnosed as having obsessive compulsive disorder, there is also a group who have both however. But if there is underlying anxiety attached to these behaviours such as a feeling that something bad is going to happen if you don't this X then it's most likely to be OCD.

These also social anxiety with people on the spectrum because they don't understand others intentions as they cannot read their tone of voice, body language or facial expressions, or they misread them! There can be other reasons for social anxiety though.

I'm guessing you're deaf for other reasons such as an infection, meningitis or something like working with loud machinery like my dad does. I don't know if there is a connection to PTSD and loud noises being traumatic to autistic individuals, I think I read something, somewhere at some point that did make that connection. But they might be unrelated for you though, you tell me.

For me, I'm fairly capable at communicating with others. The main areas I struggle with it how to make friends; the art of going up to someone and starting a conversation eludes me and I don't want to do it anyway. I also can struggle with keeping a conversation going. I don't have any real problems with Theory of Mind - the ability to makes accurate thoughts on what another person is thinking. For years at school I didn't really want to talk about anything or do anything that wasn't related to computer games, you might have had a similar experience with another activity or topic. I found talking to other people generally to be uninteresting. For example, I'd eat food with people when guests were over but after that I wanted to go any do my own thing.

You won't have the exact experience that I do though because whilst everyone on the spectrum experience similar things to varying degrees, we are all unique in our own ways.

You might want to purchase a book that talks about autism and Asperger's syndrome in more depth than sites on the internet can offer. A good start is Tony Attwood's 'A Complete Guide to Asperger's syndrome'. Another shorter book which talks more about the science behind autism is 'Autism and Asperger's Syndrome: The Facts' by Professor Simon Baron-Cohen.

 

[Servelan]

You didn't say whether you're a man or a woman, but if you're a woman, even at your age the book 'Aspergirls' might be helpful (I'm 62 and have found a lot of useful information in that book). Whether you're a man or a woman, Uniquely Human is a good book, talks about how the world sees autism wrong; there's another one called Asperger's From the Inside Out, which was written by a guy with Asperger's and IMHO is excellent as well.

Now, as to the PTSD...I found that treating my PTSD (I use cannabis) helped with my Asperger's innate anxiety. I don't know that will work for you, but it is one way to manage the anxiety of PTSD. My ex husband was abusive, and I got complex [long-term, ongoing] PTSD from the way he treated me for 18 1/2 years (I'm doing ok now, and I recognize my triggers as being depictions of abuse or stories about abuse, mostly). If long term abuse was part of your life, Pete Walker wrote an excellent book on the subject called 'Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving' and I highly recommend it; even though the focus is on childhood long-term abuse, the basic concepts are the same.

One thing I found at age 60 when I discovered that I have Asperger's is a wonderful sense of freedom - no more beating myself up about social faux pas and no more guilt about not being 'normal'. A lifetime of guilt and self-recrimination went away, and I'm much more accepting of myself as I am. I hope that you find the knowledge as empowering as I did.

 

[Servelan]

Things like wanting items to be symmetrical or in the right order can be common in people with Autistic Spectrum Conditions and there is a group of people on the spectrum who are misdiagnosed as having obsessive compulsive disorder, there is also a group who have both however. But if there is underlying anxiety attached to these behaviours such as a feeling that something bad is going to happen if you don't this X then it's most likely to be OCD.

Ooh...more symptoms to recognize! I wondered if this was autism. Thanks for sharing that. I have a hard time with things that aren't symmetrical - gets my shui all fung'd up - and might be what makes me a grammar...what's a good word for something like someone who'll beat your knuckles with a ruler if you misspell stuff and use lousy grammar other than the stereotypical 'nun'?

Love it when I can point to my 'peculiarities' and say it's Asperger's, not as an excuse, but as a reason and explanation thereof.

 

[Karen S.]

Ooh...more symptoms to recognize! I wondered if this was autism. Thanks for sharing that. I have a hard time with things that aren't symmetrical - gets my shui all fung'd up - and might be what makes me a grammar...what's a good word for something like someone who'll beat your knuckles with a ruler if you misspell stuff and use lousy grammar other than the stereotypical 'nun'?

Love it when I can point to my 'peculiarities' and say it's Asperger's, not as an excuse, but as a reason and explanation thereof.

You've described yourself as a Grammar Natzi. Welcome to the club, there are a lot of us. I had to edit this post a few times....

 

[Servelan]

You've described yourself as a Grammar Natzi. Welcome to the club, there are a lot of us. I had to edit this post a few times....

We simply have to come up with a better name for it. Grammar...hmmm. Have to think about that.

 

[puzzlingbill]

I don't like the term "Grammar Nazi". I don't shame people for having bad grammar, but I've stopped reading stories (I read a lot of fan fiction) when there were too many typos. For me it's like a blaring alarm goes off when I see a typo; reading something with a lot of them is an unpleasant experience. That makes me good at proofreading / editing and I've done some of that.

If an author wants me to read their story, they have to make an effort to clean it up before releasing it. If English isn't the author's primary language I'll cut them some slack, and there are other reasons why it can be harder for some. If a story is well-written and has an interesting storyline and interesting characters, I can put up with some typos. I think "Grammar Nazi" is a lame attempt by people who are unable to, or can't be bothered to, get it right to shift the blame to a nagging teacher type.

 

[Karen S.]

I don't like the term "Grammar Nazi". I don't shame people for having bad grammar, but I've stopped reading stories (I read a lot of fan fiction) when there were too many typos. For me it's like a blaring alarm goes off when I see a typo; reading something with a lot of them is an unpleasant experience. That makes me good at proofreading / editing and I've done some of that.

If an author wants me to read their story, they have to make an effort to clean it up before releasing it. If English isn't the author's primary language I'll cut them some slack, and there are other reasons why it can be harder for some. If a story is well-written and has an interesting storyline and interesting characters, I can put up with some typos. I think "Grammar Nazi" is a lame attempt by people who are unable to, or can't be bothered to, get it right to shift the blame to a nagging teacher type.

I added the wink emoji to indicate that I wasn't serious about it. I'm not fond of the phrase myself but it's what many people call it! I also noticed that I spelled nazi wrong, even after my many edits!

 

[Streetwise]

Hello I'm the same but its so exhausting being correct
Had a tiny moment of joy remembering a teacher in primary school agreeing that a word in a Carol that hed written on the blackboard was wrong I was astounded he wasn't annoyed
I think some people would call us controlling anal
Draconian they're wrong