wants to end relationship but is scared he'll be alone

[Cindy905]

My friend moved into an apartment with his girlfriend a few months ago. He is not happy about this and goes back and forth about telling her to leave and ending the relationship. His big concern is that he will be alone - he may think this but not true. Anyway, the girl has no job, not helping with the rent, is messy and upsets my friend every day. He is depressed and can't bring himself to tell her to go. Anyone have any suggestions to motivate him to take this big step???

 

[King_Oni]

I think he should think about what "benefits" he has from her sticking around. People like this leeching of you personally, are holding someone back in doing what he/she wants to do.

At some point it'll go really sour if he keeps doing this. He might consider this; is this worth ending up at a therapist for? Because that will eventually happen I think. He'll get more depressed, and at some point, dare I say... domestic violence will occur. Not saying that this will happen for everyone, but this will happen from time to time. That's a moment where she'll leave, and he's most vulnerable.

So all in all, he should ask himself what he wants out of life. And to be honest, maybe someone should tell him that "being with someone" isn't a goal in life by itself... being with someone are means to keep you happy to achieve goals.

 

[apassingword]

someone using me like that would hurt so much, I'd rather be alone.